J-Mo, thanks for the recap! I agree with you 100%. The whole deliberation was f**ked up. I had EXACTLY the same reaction when they said they loved Anime's photo. I think this cycle, most girls have one-note: RB, MeeMaw, Anime and AmINuts. I just hope Teyomboy wins this.

J-Mo, oh dear, I'm laughing so hard my mascara is running! Thank you for all the time and effort you put into these genius recaps. I couldn't understand any of the Brazilian ladies talk but you deciphered it so well.

I thought Fo would get nothing but praise because she was the only one who actually looked like Carmen Maranda. But you're right, it is ridiculous the hypocritical way they judge these girls.

And I quess we'll never know if Gay-Jay did actually tell Rich Bitch to stay in just one pose for 50 frames.

You can often predict where each season of ANTM is going to go based on where Survivor goes...as they are both under CBS auspices, and the travel deals more often than not are linked.

They even used the same capoeira, a Brazilian form of martial arts, this week.

Maybe in the future, they can swap casts...although the models wouldn't notice the starvation aspect of Survivor, it would have been fun to watch Rich Bitch deal with bugs, rain, and sleeping in a hut next to everyone else. Plus it would be harder for them to trash a campground.

And, yes...MeeMaw is on her last, feeble legs, as they used the phrase of death, "She just doesn't look fresh." Especially in comparison to the lovely produce the ladies were wearing on their heads.

Those headpieces really were outstanding.

i actually really liked allison's shot this week. i think she finally learned that just a tiny change makes a huge difference. like look at the first and second pictures in the collage (this week and the first week), they're essentially the same face but this weeks is so much more striking. like first week was just some dumb chick making a face, but this week's was much more commercial/print ad girl making a face.

Of course I'm a fan of both Fo Ho (who is ridiculously cute) and AnimeEyes (who is ridiculously ....???) , so it doesn't really matter what they do.

Interesting to see Fo's vindictiveness come through.

And AnimeEyes just so wonderfully clumsy, I keep thinking I'm looking at a bobblehead doll.

Neither Teeyomboy or Animat get my juices flowing, and it's pretty obvious that MeeMaw's going home next week.

What was on Anime's belly? Looked like a treasure trail (which I would love to follow...I find her very hot for some reason), but when we stopped the dvr, it looked like a band-aid or something...you can see it on the "you don't have to be psychic" photo...

Loved me some Rich-bitch...way frackin hot, perfect, body, but too much of a bitch...play on playah, just on someone else's playground...

J-Mo
I love love love you. But only in a bestest bff way. I don't want to have your baby or anything, ugh. And we both were in Minneapolis in the 80s so that makes us kinfolk, right?
Anyway.
I've been unemployed for the 1st time in my life and reading your posts gives me a reason to live on. Seriously...kind of... sort of... actually.
It's the only half hour in my life where I snort out my nose when I read anything. And I do so look forward to that. "Ice pirates and loofah sponges...." I love it!
Your posts are spot on. If you could find the time to review the latest Celebrity Apprentice debacle my nose would really appreciate it.

J-mo, I did the exact same thing, I went to the website and looked at all the Anime's in a row . . . f'in hypocritical BS!!! Although I did think she was bringing it in the shoot and poses and I was happy as a clam to see her finally get it. Fo really is a beauty, and her childishness is easy to understand in such a young thing . . . and there was nothing wrong with her pic.

RB, once again, knew she was going from the list of complaints--the editing is so obvious on this show . . . but good riddance, I say, whatever looks she has are so diminished by her attitude. And she's one damn uninspired model . . . good luck to her, I'm sure the world can't wait.

Sadly, I'm sleeping on my keyboard today, and it's not the best way to appreciate the artistry of you (I sowwy) And that video was really sad, in so many ways--what a different world we live in, that had to be the worst show ever, and even sadder it was her last performance. Also sorry to see her remembered as the banana lady . . . oh well, better than nothing I suppose.

I found that challenge to be very un explained, and it's true about mee maw--pity about her age and face, coz she's clearly got the chops . . .

J-Mo, meu amor! Thanks for the great recap! Your "Portuglish" is way better than those Brazilians's English! I'm Brazilian and I couldn't understand them either! Where are the subtitles when we need them? Why they insist in speaking English if they can't? lol

I have to agree with Rich Bitch, tho, Sao Paulo stinks! The air smells like sewage..and a favela is so depressing and smelly too!
BTW, Carmen Miranda was born in Portugal.

Can someone tell me what Tyra meant by, "she looks like my age?"
Kisses!

I'm just glad Natalie pointed out she was following Jay's lame directions. He always gets it wrong - or he sets up the girl he know's supposed to go home that week. He lulls them into a false sense of security so they are shocked when they are sent home. Tyra knows it's true - that's why she gets so defensive when girls point out the flaws in her show.
In an interview on another site, Natalie blasts the show and their editing (nothing knew for reality victims) and she reiterates the inconsistencies in the show.

I think the difference in Anime's first week picture and this one is the red lipstick. It helps define her face. Otherwise, I don't think I've ever seen her look homelier.

I am starting to like Aminat. She's got a hell of a body and legs ten miles long. I find her one facial expression quite striking.

I'm thinking Teyomboy or Fo should have won this week.

MeeMaw would look years younger with longer, softer-colored hair. And eyebrows would help a lot.

"Poor thing. At first I thought she was saying something about ice pirates and loofah sponges"

Love it!

Too bad they are in a country where about half of the women are more beautiful than these girls.

Thanks J-MO, wonderful always again! first - your literal translation of accents is fantastic! i love attempting to read it in that accent... even though i speak portuguese, its fun to try it out.
and second, daniel the sexy URSO!!! ROFL, i luv that line J-Mo!

OMG! where do we start with the hypoCRAZY that is Tyra & Co this week?
Too Miranda, not Miranda enough...
You know, Richbitch might be not the most likeable girl, but Kudos to her! she stood up and spoke up about the fact that Jay was telling her the shot was great and everything... but when Tyty went through the frames "there were no varieties"
thats why she was eliminated, she spoke back to the "judges". I agree her picture was WAY better than AmINuts (legs will be broken).
they murder Allison week after week for having the same face, yet Aminuts displays the same face in all photos, and she is still in the "competition"
and YES! Allison, the face was the same! lol but yet it was DIFFERENT this week according to Nigel Boreker, paulina porizkunty, Miss J, and Tyty.
next week i predict Celia will go, cuz this week they already pulled the shes tooo old card again, for 3 weeks in a row, remember the aunty comment?
i can see teyomboy winning this shit, even though her picture wasnt Miranda, but it was... yeah or whatever something like that... im confused with all the hypocrisy.
as for Fo-Ho, she looked cuter with long hair, this weirdo hairstyle she is sporting is not working for her, she looks real squishy face.
besides that, girl got so confused, and as much as i think she is bland, that was soo unfair for her, she was TOOO MIRANDA, and was told to "pretend" your in jeans and tshirt, WHAT THE FUCK!
and then to say "you needed the extra frames" FUCK ME DEAD. WHAT IS WITH THE crazy bat shit talk Tyra & co go on about.
ANYWAY, RICHBITCH WELL DONE for speaking out and taking a stand.
And BTW CHECK OUT AUSTRALIA's NExt top model!!! our crop of Ano/bullimic and delusional chicks are awesome! 1st episode, there is already backstabbing, bullying, finger down the throat after dinner - GOD damn this bitches are crazy!
then the judges praise this girl in the bikini shoot where her RIBS are poking out, and they said "HOT BODY", fashion is a sick sick world LOL.

Oh J-Mo, I do so look foward to your recaps every week! I am in complete agreement about the randomness and bs of the judging. But we're talking about Tyra here, so I don't expect it to make sense.

I loved the last pic of rich bitch, looking like she wants to kill Tyra. Just once, I wish someone would lose their shit at judging. How great would it have been if she was all "Are you fucking KIDDING me?"! Ah well, a girl can dream.

SWAK, PottyMouth

On the first season of Canada's Next Top Model, one of the girls that was eliminated right near the end (she didn't quite make the Top 3) kept threatening in confessional to go off on the judges if they eliminated her. They did. She didn't go completely off but she did get this sour look on her face, spits out "You just made a big mistake. A BIG mistake!" at the judges and stormed out without saying goodbye to any of the girls left. It was WONDERFUL! Her name was Brandi Alexander (I swear) and every time she was on the screen I would think "Yeah, but that's just her strippin' name." She was late for her go-sees because she stopped to go shopping for herself along the way, she went snooping through everyone else's luggage while they were out at their spa prize. She was gold, I tell ya.

I had high hopes for Rich Bitch pulling something like that. I wanted a foot stomping, finger pointing meltdown in from of the panel but no, she was actually pretty gracious (gracious for her anyway). Still have my fingers crossed that AmINuts will cut someone.

I'm so sorry, I forgot the most important part: Great recap, J-Mo!

So I'm all "but what's coprophilia?" and I Google it, and now I'm scarred for life. Ewwwww.

Loopy, I thought Fo's hair looked fine when they first cut it, but either it isn't growing out well or she doesn't know how to style it. Yeah, you do have to style hair that short, or at least put some product on it, or it just gets bushy.

My cat gets the same expression on her face that Miss Jay demonstrated when she is in the litterbox, only happier. Do you think she expects Nigel to jump out and take her picture?

mercurian... LOL, you're welcome, and chile, I hope Teyomboy wins this thing, too, at least she has two notes! xoxo :)

LisaMay... thanks for the love, sugarpie (sorry your eye makeup turned moist!) and I agree, Fo Ho surely did seem like a young ghost of Miz Miranda, but I guess that's just not good enough for Tyra & Co! xoxo :)

cattyfan... OMG, I was so shocked when I saw Schoonie's recap of "Survivor" and read about the capoeira going on there, too! Weird. I would kill to see Rich-Bitch complaining in the wild, too... I bet her ass would be on Exile Island from Day One and never leave! xoxo :)

whitney... I'm jealous that you can find the variety in Anime's pictures, whenever I look at that collage I just get six similar shades of "Duhhhh" and some nibbly noises. Still, I can kinda see what you're saying, she just needs to distort her face more. xoxo :)

itchy... do you know anyone who could manufacture an Anime-Eyes Bobblehead Doll? You could make a skillion dollars with that! I also found Fo Ho's new bitchy streak to be interesting (and a little sad, she seemed so much sweeter when she was crying all the time). xoxo :)

pappy44... I don't know what's going on with Anime's belly, but I didn't think that girls were supposed to have the "treasure trail". Come to think of it, *I* have a "treasure trail" (although I'm so damned hairy on my belly that it's more like a "treasure freeway"). Loved your kiss-off to Rich-Bitch, that was mighty cute! xoxo :)

K_lo... Shout out to my MPLS peeps! Bloomington in da houuuuuse! LOL! Okay, I won't ever do that again. Thanks for the kudos, you're awfully kind, especially in light of being in job limbo right now (I hope things get better soon). BTW, Honey Gangsta is the one who recaps Celebrity Reha- I mean, Apprentice, I hope you'll check her out, she's an awesome writer! xoxo :)

juddfan... I know, wasn't that video a tad chilling? Times sure were different back then when you see what passed for comedic entertainment, but thing I find the most fascinating about it is the fact that Carmen never lost her grin, that's a true professional performer. Still, the jokes on there were horrible... but then again, so are the ones on a lot of today's sitcoms. P.S. Get some rest! xoxo :)

detinha... OMG, I am so pleased you liked my Fo-Netics, I just love accents, not only are they sexy (at times) but they can be so much fun! BTW, the comment Tyra made about MeeMaw looking "her age" I think was meant to convey that while MeeMaw is only 25, in some of her photos she's looking more like Tyra's current age of 35. Thanks for the love! xoxo :)

thatswhatshesaid... you know I was totally all over finding said interview with Rich-Bitch, and I was not disappointed, thank you for the tip, she basically claims she's EXACTLY the opposite of how she was portrayed on the show, and that she's "not rich" and that Tyra favors the black girls. BITTER! xoxo :)

pixielated... you've got good eyesight, too! I'm glad that somebody can see something interesting in Anime's pictures! All they ever do for me is make me tired. P.S. MeeMaw would also look younger if she ate something. xoxo :)

loopygorilla... aaaaah, two Portuguese-speakers??!? I'm really going to have to be on my toesies now! So glad you enjoyed the sexybear caption, you know I love 'em like crazy. I'm with you, all the wack-job judging was making me nutsy, too! xoxo :)

PottyMouth... honeychile, I would have been walking on the ceiling if Rich-Bitch had just pushed Tyra away and said "Fuck YOU, bitch!" and snapped her fingers at her a couple of times and sashayed out. WHEN IS MY DREAM GOING TO COME TRUE?!?! One of these girls is going to have to do that one of these days! Love to you (and Hell's Kitchen) too! xoxo :)

kizarny... my money for a cutting is actually on Anime, but sadly, I think she'll only be doing it to herself. And thank you for the love, too! xoxo :)

LAjane... I'm so sorry, I find these amazing and incredible words (like "coprophilia") and I can't resist using them when situations arise that demand them. Have some TUMS on me, please. And, please, don't ever do a google PHOTO search for that word. xoxo :)

pixielated... "My cat gets the same expression on her face that Miss Jay demonstrated when she is in the litterbox, only happier. Do you think she expects Nigel to jump out and take her picture?" OMG, this was the first real belly laugh that I've had all day (and with a belly like mine, that's really saying something)! Thank you for that! xoxo :)

Thanks to all of you guys for taking the time out to read and comment, I absolutely appreciate everyone's input. Working on this week's episode now!

love, J-Mo :)

Woot...a shout out compliment from j-mo... :) Feel free to use it anytime you like...just give me props when you do! :)

I don't think it was hair, but I can't figure out what it was...band aid? Microphone tape? I have no clue!!

Anyone else see that and have a thought?