Recap: Top Model: Bulls On Parade

antm11-22-06

There is no doubt that I still love America's Next Top Model, but it is quite clear that the producers are a little too much in love with themselves. There has been a well-publicized writers strike on the show, but I really don't think the writers are the problem, unless they were the ones charged with picking out the models and then eliminating them. The show practically writes itself as long as you start with a good group of girls at the beginning. And somewhere along the way, the judges started thinking that the audiences at home would think that the girls would be great models just because they were paid to tell us that.

If there was anything that could save the season with only threee episodes left, it seems like the judges realized in the last few eliminations that they need to throw out some of the gimmicks just in case somebody unfamiliar with the show turned it on one night and thought that it was actually an open audition for the sequel to House of a 1000 Corpses instead of Seventeen Magazine and Cover Girl. We could only hope that their most recent epiphany could save this season from becoming one big joke.

Like I said last week, nobody was really surprised when Jaeda went home and about the only thing they could have done to make it more obvious was to start calling her Fredo. Although Caridee had an awful week, I am sure that she was looking forward to bouncing back and proving everybody wrong. However, if she was going to be sent home, she decided that she was going to make the most of her time in Spain.

The girls decided to call up their male model friends to accompany them to dinner, which gave them a chance to learn a few more things about Spanish guys. For example, many of you girls may be thinking that Spanish guys are so much more romantic and really above all of the cheesy crap you are used to from American guys. Well, you would be wrong. Growing up in Spain may give you an appreciation for long naps in the afternoon and a well-made paiea, but according to Amanda, it doesn't give you an appreciation of better jokes and pick up lines. She does believe that Spanish guys smell better, which I agree, especially if you think, "smell better" and "suffocating you to death with cologne" are the same thing.

Whatever you say about the guys in Spain, it seemed like Caridee liked the bad jokes and the cologne because she and Victor were making out like two teenagers at a drive-in. This didn't really surprise me a whole lot because I figured that if there were anyone who would randomly hook up with a dude in Spain, it would be Caridee. I am not trying to say that she is a slut or anything, but if any of the Spanish guys decided that they should make the effort to dribble in the lane a little bit and get to the basket, wouldn't it make sense that they would be shooting for Caridee's hoop? Michelle wondered what they could be talking about since they don't speak the same language. Caridee may not know much Spanish, and Victor may not know much English, but they both seemed well versed at the language called "sucking face", which is a universal translator for the young and horny.

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To tell you the truth, I am kind of surprised that they didn't make a bigger deal of this little incident throughout the rest of the episode. Caridee said that it's not just a competition, but it's about being in Spain and having fun. Normally, I would call this a very healthy attitude, but Caridee does have a boyfriend and while I obviously don't know anything about the nature of their relationship, I found it kind of odd that the producers didn't try to exploit it and show her crying about how much she loved her boyfriend and was upset at what she did, yada, yada. Then again, they did have a lot to get done during this episode, so what happens in Spain is going to stay in Spain, for now.

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Comments (16)

someonespecial Author Profile Page:

I really liked the photos this week. Though surprisingly, my favourite picture was Eugena's. Usually, she does pretty poorly, but this week, she really stepped it up! And even though Melrose is so damn annoying, I think she really deserves to win. She has done nothing, but improved since the first week. And she actually knows a lot about the fashion industry. I adore Caridee, but she is really unstable and crazy sometimes.

LagunaBeached Author Profile Page:

I was never really a fan of Eugena, I thought she was pretty and all but her pictures weren't good. This week however, she turned out to be my favorite.

Leah3t Author Profile Page:

I'm so tired of Tyra fancying herself a therapist.

And nothing like coming home from a 12 hour day in corp america to hear tyra say no industry is harder than modeling. please.

tj Author Profile Page:

Michelle wasn't my favorite, but I really disagree with your opinions about her. Like the judges, I thought Michelle's photo was the best this week. There's no way it was the worst. Bags under her eyes? Not seeing them... are you referring to her lower eyelides? I think Eugena's skin issues are a MUCH bigger problem.

Also, I'm sick of the whole "journey" thing and wanting to give it to "the girl who wants it" the most. Should Furonda have won last year's competition just because she was the most improved? Can anyone be a model if they want it badly enough? It's pretty lame that girls like AJ had to go home just so Eugena could get a great photo in the 10th episode. B.S.

brilliantmistake Author Profile Page:

I gotta agree with tj, I get frustrated with whole "desire before talent" aspect of the show, although it was Tyra's delusions about how hard modeling was that sucked me into the show in the first cycle (and it was J-Unit's recaps of ANTM that got me into TVGasm).

Basically, they said Michelle was the better model and took better pictures. If you were hiring a model, would you hire the one that took better pictures or the one that "wants it more"?

And one random observation- Tyra's hair looked amazing during the judging.

To quote from one of my favourite South Park episodes "Whatever, I do what I want!"

Tyrant or not, it's her show. To me it makes a helluva lot more sense for this show to be about rewarding those who want it most, given the fact that ANTM has very little to do with the "real" modelling world, and the very fact of entering a preposterous, challenge-based competition to pursue a career in modelling. The fact that they call it "top" model is just plain laughable. But that's why I enjoy the show, really.

If the girls who seem to have a natural ability are indeed "all that" they will do well, and are better off not winning the show. Though I'm not convinced that even this crops favourites aren't simply the best of a bad lot.

Ms. Tumnus Author Profile Page:

Oh, I think we need a package-off. Phil, of course, would win. He could rock those aqua spandex trousers like nobody's business.

Shollia Author Profile Page:

Totally agree with you TJ.
I'm so freaking sick of Eugena being in this comp while other girls who looked WAY better than her and took WAY better pics were eliminated before just b/c they weren't sure that they wanted this 100%.
Eugena's pic was good this week, but she's sucked every single other week of the competition. Same went for Jaeda. Yet.. there they were.. still there and kickin while girls who were obviously better got kicked off.
I dunno WTF the judges are smoking this year but their decisions have been very suspect and just weird.
I think the judges right now for some reason are really trying to push Eugena as being a top contender for some reason even though every other week she's sucked balls.

McCreamy Author Profile Page:

If it was all about who wants it the most they should have kept Brooke much longer.. I hope next cycle has prettier girls. I know the modeling industry like the interesting and off looking girls but I didn't see much of that this time, I just don't find any of them attractive in any way at all except Caridee.

Devoted Satellite Author Profile Page:

Did anyone else find it bizarre that the final photos of the girls showed the bull right next to them under their cape? As opposed to the bull being across the venue, 50 ft away? So it wasn't necessary to have the bull in the venue with them at all. Hmm....Photoshop anyone?

I guess they had to have the drama this year of scaring the poor contestants with a fierce beastly creature (besides Miss J).

I miss the fire of Janice at the panel. Twiggy makes me yawn and Miss J has no business being there. I'll put "Change ANTM Judge Panel" on my wish list for Xmas :)

LuvzSunshine Author Profile Page:

Hey J-unit, you don't have to be a hippie to think bull fighting is inhumane. I think it's disgusting.

BSL Author Profile Page:

This may sound stupid but what's inhumane about matadors and all that stuff? It can't be as bad as rodeos in America.

Thanks for the great recap, J-Unit. Comcast was down on Wednesday night. I've missed a lot this season and...I'm fine with that. This season just hasn't grabbed me. I don't even care who wins, although I'm rooting for Caridee.

mcsquared65 Author Profile Page:

What's inhumane about bullfighting? Well, the object is, to kill the bull, one spear at a time. Kill or be killed. Great date idea, huh?

mcsquared65 Author Profile Page:

What's inhumane about bullfighting? Well, the object is, to kill the bull, one spear at a time. Kill or be killed. Great date idea, huh?

mcsquared65 Author Profile Page:

I really can't stand Melrose. I would love for anyone else to win.

I stopped watching this show Season 3 or 4 (The one with Eva, Yaya, Amanda, Ann

Just based on pictures alone (dunno what goes on on the show) I think Melrose should win.

Truth is, as Karl Lagerfeld said, most of the models that come out of this show have zero potential in for high fashion.

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