This week on ANTM we learn the true meaning of pain. Some days, your palms just ache from playing pattycake and other days, you just ache for your favorites to take the high road. Viewer discretion is advised due to albino nudity and possible dirty thoughts courtesy of hunky dreamboat Nigel Barker. Male viewer discretion is advised because it seems like we need to talk about pregnancy and other lady troubles more this cycle than any other. So pop an Aleve, cozy on up, and let's jump right in!
Menstrual pain or Broken Down Marionette Doll Legs? You decide!
The girls are chilling in the fabcab, presumably heading back to the apartment. Everyone gushes over how pretty Aimee looked in her last photo. "I know!" she squeals. "I've never ever before this gotten that many compliments!" On the other end of the modesty spectrum, Lauren worries that she doesn't have enough confidence and that she's going to have to go through a huge struggle in addition to the competition. It's been six weeks and I don't think it bodes very well for Lauren that she seems to have made zero improvements in the confidence department - this will definitely be her Achilles heal.
Back at the apartment, Claire hops on the phone and calls her husband where he fills her in on what her daughter's been up to. Cut to a montage of Claire, husband, and baby and oh my goodness, I'm going to steal this baby. Seriously.
Look at you, saying hi to your new mommy! Mama loves you too!
If you wouldn't commit a felony kidnapping for this baby, I regret to inform you that your heart is made of stone.
Claire then explains how it's very tough to be away from her daughter, but she wants to show her how important it is to follow her dreams. She then also gets into more breastfeeding details then I ever needed to know. If you haven't seen the episode and are just reading this recap, I'll spare you - but suffice to say, the term "drying up" is used. Blecccch. You know how everyone says being around a bratty little kid is the best birth control motivator around? I'm pretty sure that for me, it's hearing the dirty details about what pregnancy does to you. I have a pregnant neighbor who is bilingual in both baby and pregnancy. She constantly shares experiences about being preggers that she thinks are "absolute joys" while meanwhile I'm busy trying to calculate how many different birth control methods I can use at once to ensure that I'm never up the duff. To any and all of my future husbands - if you want children, we'll just steal Claire's babies mmmkay?
Blurry nightvision cameras and labels of shadowy figures can only mean one thing... some major drama's about to go down! In the DARK!
It appears that Dominique sets her alarm clock way early and let it go off for a solid hour, which (rightly) pissed Claire off. I feel her pain because I had a college roommate who would do the exact same thing and I generally had to be the one to wake her up by shouting her name because the incessant beeping by her ears didn't seem to do the trick. Dominique, of course, blames the alarm clock, because she's "confused with it at times." Gotta love how she manages to make this situation not her fault. God I hate people like this.
The ensuing fight wakes up all of the other girls in the room, and we get a shot of a sleepy Stacy-Ann and the funniest picture in the history of photography taped to her bed.
Save the drama for your mama!
Anya peeps her little head out of the bathroom to tell Dominique to take responsibility and whoa, I kind of forgot how annoying her voice was. Has she spoken at all in the past few episodes? Since we apparently have to survey every girl to get her opinion on the situation, Aimee pops in that she's neutral on the situation because she's one of the most mature girls in the house. While I agree with this statement, I'm pretty sure she doesn't have opinion because she's one of those lucky biatches who can sleep through anything and the alarm didn't wake her.
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Comments (26)
Good recap overall, but I thought you were way too easy on Claire and Whitney. Claire is such a child, and was soooo mean and petty-Dominique practically begged her to just take their shit-talking elsewhere, and Claire was relentless when she didn't need to be. It's kinda scary that someone so immature is raising a child herself.To say she needs to grow up is an understatement. Whitney was out of line so many times with Dominique-the "get in the trash, that's your place" comment was despicable- Dominique wasn't even talking to that heifer! Fatima was totally right-Whitney starts all the shit in the house-as can be seen in the second bitch fest with whitney,Lauren and Claire blatantly harassing and bullying Dominique. They don't realize how cowardly they truly are by ganging up on someone-sorry for being so longwinded- this episode pissed me off big time-I can't believe I'm saying this, but Dominique proved this episode that she might actually be too good for these people-Team Dominique!!
1 of 26 | Posted by jazz hands | Posted on March 30, 2008 4:59 PM
Funny stuff! I don't blame Claire & Co. a bit for talking while Dom was trying to sleep. Let her get a good taste of what it feels like not to get the rest you need. Maybe now she'll figure out that alarm clock. If not, Claire should keep up the nightly meetings until Dom gets it. As they say, turn about's fair play. Afterall, we MUST have our beauty sleep.
Actually, I wish everyone on these reality shows would show a little class and a lot of respect for one another. But then again, what would we talk about?
BTW, I do believe only Tyra goes through all the film. The rest of the judges see only the final selection.
2 of 26 | Posted by xqzmoi | Posted on March 30, 2008 5:41 PM
jazz hands - I hear ya, and respect the point of view. I feel like a lot of people may have crossed over this week. Personally though, I have no respect for people who can't take any responsibility for their own actions and always try to shove blame off onto other people, which is why Dominique still (and will probably always be) in the doghouse with me.
I don't think that Claire and Whitney in particular handled it as well as they could have. Don't forget it was a few short weeks ago when Dominique and Marvita were jumping down Aimee's throat for something way more petty than the alarm clock issue. Dominique just strikes me as the quintessential example of the person who can dish it out but can't take it.
3 of 26 | Posted by Hoolia | Posted on March 30, 2008 5:43 PM
Oh please, Dominique deserved what she got. She's been bitchy the entire season.
I've never seen Claire do anything immature until last episode. Do I think she went a little too far? Yes. But I don't really think it was totally unjust. Whitney probably shouldn't have butted in, but I hate Dominique so who cares? Same for Lauren.
As for the whole not moving thing. Dominique's stupid alarm had been disturbing people's sleep - and someone (Claire, I think) said it wasn't the first time. So, if she disrupts other people's sleep, it's hypocritical of her to bitch them out for doing the same. Could they have moved? Yeah. Would it have been the nice thing to do? Yeah. But whatever. An eye for an eye, bitch.
Go Claire, Whitney and Lauren! Down with Dominique and Fatima. Stacy-Ann and Anya are forgettable and I'm neutral about Kat. I liked Aimee, but she definitely wasn't cut out for modelling. The good girl never lasts.
4 of 26 | Posted by georgiababe | Posted on March 30, 2008 5:45 PM
Hoolia, I completely agree that Dominique should have taken responsibility for the alarm clock thing, Lord knows I would be angry too if someone carelessly left their alarm clock buzzing to wake up other people. But Claire called her a bitch, without Dominique's provocation-if someone called me a bitch, first thing in the morning, I would feel punked off, and wouldn't take too kindly to that person.
Also, in the example you cited about how it was Dominique and Marvita who were jumping down Aimee's throat over, I believe it was, bathroom time and whether Aimee could take a shower- if you take a look back at that episode, it was actually Claire who was leading the charge against Aimee, she (rudely) stated to Aimee that she couldn't take a shower in privacy due to the fact that the others might need to use that bathroom as well(never mind the fact that there are apparently two other bathrooms)-
that incident coupled with her "in your face Aimee" victory cheer during elimination this week, I think it's obvious that little miss "earth-peace-loving nurturing mother" Claire is a real asshole- just because she hasn't been getting the obvious "bitch edit" so far,(except this episode) doesn't mean she's not a nasty person-I thought Dominique was heads and tails above these girls this week-
I'm just waiting for someone to finally give Whitney the verbal bitchslap she so richly deserves- and she's not "plus-sized" she's just fat and out of shape-there IS a difference- I call bullshit if Whitney makes it further in the comp than Toccara-the only plus-sized model who deserved to win...I really need to take a breather-lol
5 of 26 | Posted by jazz hands | Posted on March 30, 2008 6:21 PM
Talking about Toccara ... Anyone watching her on Celebrity Fit Club. Granted she is still full of drama but GAWD she looks super super super hot.
6 of 26 | Posted by doriangz | Posted on March 30, 2008 11:53 PM
I'm disgusted by Toccara being on "Celebrity Fit Club".
1) Not a celebrity. As Piers Morgan (Celebrity Apprentice, America's Got Talent, etc.) made clear regarding Omarossa, being on an American reality show doesn't make you a celebrity, it makes you a joke.
2) If your claim to "fame" is that you were a plus-sized model and you made it clear over and over (and over) that you were proud of your size and all the crap she spewed out about loving her body and who she was, you can't go and be on a weight-loss show! Unless of course you're a total hypocrite...
7 of 26 | Posted by Anonymous | Posted on March 31, 2008 2:27 AM
To Anonymous: Tocarra has done more since being on Top Model. She hosts a game show on BET, and has appeared in a lot of magazines. As far as her body and all that...I don't know.
So as far as this week. I agree with most of you. I don't care what happens, and who was right or wrong. I can't stand Dominique, and her third person speeches. Regardless, I highly doubt she'll win either way. I still like Claire. We have to remeber that we are only seeing snippets of what's really going on. She probably was at her wits end, with being around Dominique and missing her baby and husband. Oh well.
I'm ready for Stacy-Ann to go. She does the same pose every week!
And to whoever said that Whitney is not plus-sized and that she is just fat...Wow.
8 of 26 | Posted by MrsBojangles | Posted on March 31, 2008 6:34 AM
Dominique is a man. There is no way someone that manly didn't start life out with an Adam's Apple.
I totally agree with you Hoolia - I would have treat Dominique the same way - bitchy interrupts my sleep, and she expects to get her beauty rest? Hell no! That tranny is the epitome of can dish it out, but can't take it in. There is no way she is going to get very far - she is the one with the least CoverGirl potential.
I looooved Whitney's picture, and was so pissed about the previews for next episode. I honestly think she could win it all, and she should at least make final three.
Ugh, looks like Fatima is back to her bitchy self next episode.
9 of 26 | Posted by VegasDarling | Posted on March 31, 2008 8:55 AM
Dominique is awful, but the way Claire (and Whitney) handled the situation was so inappropriate. I'm sure in the situation they were in I might have acted the same way, but being an outsider looking in, it seemed like Claire was being completely immature.
As far as Whitney winning, I don't think this will happen (this round or ever). They would really need to change the format of the show, or do one with only plus sized models. Designers make sample sizes and Whitney doesn't fit in those. Also, normal runway shows do not have plus sized models in them. They would need to find a designer who does both plus sized collections as well as regular collections.
I honestly don't even have a favorite at this point. They are all slightly annoying and petty.
10 of 26 | Posted by yankeesfan | Posted on March 31, 2008 9:40 AM
Claire said at one point that she had asked Dominique 7 times to fix it. OMG in my opinion Claire has restraint if it took her that long to bitch that bitch out. She would have been dead the 3rd time if it was me. And what kind of dumbass can't figure out an alarm clock??
I have no respect for Dominique. She should take responsibility for her own actions. That fact that SHE is raising a child is scary to me. The kid will probably have an ego as big as hers....
I'm rooting for Kat, Whitney, and Claire to take this thing.
11 of 26 | Posted by pixi-stix | Posted on March 31, 2008 11:09 AM
Anyone calling Whitney "not plus size, just fat" is absolutely ridiculous. She's a size 10, as was mentioned in a previous show. Also, she's got to be at least 5'7" which is a requirement for ANTM. Maybe I'm crazy, but calling someone that tall and that normal sized fat just seems crazy. She also had a bra top on in one episode and didn't even look big then. I would take her over tranny manny dominique any day.
12 of 26 | Posted by leslie_pcc | Posted on March 31, 2008 1:17 PM
Put Dominique in a blond wig for her shoot, and she would have been a dead ringer for Donatella Versace.
13 of 26 | Posted by jesusloveswinners | Posted on March 31, 2008 1:19 PM
I love Claire, but agree that she was a little out of line this episode. I think the part when she told Dominique "I never said I was that big of a person" was pretty immature. Even if you're not always the bigger person in a situation, should you really admit it....?
14 of 26 | Posted by cocomomo | Posted on March 31, 2008 2:05 PM
Wow, lot's of discourse here!!! I don't like Dom, and find her to be an unlistener, and, long ago and far away, I think I did a hurricane juddfan, like Lauren did--it's gets extremely frustrating to try and reason with someone unreasonable--not that it's an excuse. They are all young, and I forgive them on the grounds that I was no better at their age-glad I'm better now tho.
Dom can do some good pics sometimes, her spontaneous poses look more polished too--hate to admit. I'm a Whit fan, and she's sexy and carries herself well--more confident than the other's I"ve seen, also didn't see Toccura.
Tivo cut the end, so I missed panel, but I was shocked to see Aimee leave so soon--just gorgeous in the pics, and what's wrong with a sweet Cover Girl.
Was it me, or was the Nigel shoot pervy--seemed like a set up for them to get down, yes, I know he's married, and he is hot, but still, AWKWARD!
Anya photographs well for someone so odd looking, same as Dom, only she's manly. Claire was TMI to me, get a pump girl!
15 of 26 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on March 31, 2008 2:17 PM
Great recap, thanks Hoolia! You definitely capture the show...
This season's ANTM has so much petty drama, it's actually fast-forward worthy.... I get tired of listening to them yell at each other without making any sense. :)
Oh, and does anyone think Claire looks a bit like Gwen Stefani in her 'country' photo?
16 of 26 | Posted by teri00 | Posted on March 31, 2008 2:36 PM
Great recap, thanks Hoolia! You definitely capture the show...
This season's ANTM has so much petty drama, it's actually fast-forward worthy.... I get tired of listening to them yell at each other without making any sense. :)
Oh, and does anyone think Claire looks a bit like Gwen Stefani in her 'country' photo?
17 of 26 | Posted by teri00 | Posted on March 31, 2008 2:37 PM
Sometimes with people like Dominique you have to sink to their level, no matter how deep into the mire you have to go. However, there is no need to resort to shouting matches. Personally, I would have given her 3 very specific warnings before ripping her silly little alarm clock out of the wall & tossing it into the street. The alarm clock thing is just a way for her to get under the skin of the other girls & put them off their "game". Happens every season. The smart girls don't let it work.
Still a big fan of Claire, Whitney, & Kat, even though none of those fools can say her name (say it with me folks "Kat - r - Zay - nyah"). However, I seriously doubt any of these girls has what it takes to be a "Top" model.
18 of 26 | Posted by kdiva97 | Posted on March 31, 2008 2:39 PM
Great recap, Hoolia! Your recap is getting a lot of comments!
I also think Claire took it a bit too far with the bitch comment, and talking trash on the couch with her henchmen. She doesn't seem all that smart to me, especially by what I've seen in the previews for this week. Who the hell falls face first on a piece of plexiglass? Did she think she would float because water was on it?!?!?
Cute baby though!
19 of 26 | Posted by lexxi1129 | Posted on March 31, 2008 3:27 PM
I forgot to thank you Hoolia, esp for having to watch those screaming matches and then report on them . . . haven't seen the scenes, but I guess I can't wait . . .
20 of 26 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on March 31, 2008 4:01 PM
So I read in a past recap that Mr. Jay hosted Canada's Next Top Model. Oh, wow! He is SO good with the girls and a great host. I think Mr. Jay is hard not to love, but if you watch Canada's Next Top Model, Cycle 2, Episode 5... you will just fall in love with him. I'd suggest checking youtube for it right now!
21 of 26 | Posted by marie2309 | Posted on March 31, 2008 6:53 PM
Hoolia - I wanted to add my kudos to the pile. I think you are a great recap writer. You manage to be funny and snarky without going for the easy laughs. Plus, it's evident in your writing that you enjoy the show you are recapping and that makes it so much more fun to read your stuff.
I agree with marie - Mr. Jay is adorable. I have a few inappropriate crushes in my life (the kind of crushes that are ridiculous for one reason or another). Mr. Jay falls under that list (as does Tim Gunn and Bob the trainer from Biggest Loser).
I liked the theme for this week's photo shoot - it didn't seem as contrived as many of them have been lately. I could tell by the edit that the bottom two would be Claire and Aimee with Aimee going. I didn't think it was fair though. I think Stacy Ann put up a much worse photo than Aimee and Aimee's other photos to this point were flawless.
Loved the photographer - and am surprised they didn't mention his reality show since it has the same production team.
22 of 26 | Posted by TinkerbellAPixie | Posted on April 1, 2008 8:45 AM
I can understand why no one is really sympathizing with Dominique, but what a lot of people are completely missing was that she said she had a migraine. I personally have had migraines for years, and the only way to get rid of them is to sleep it off, in the dark and quiet. Any light or sound causes immediate pain.
So if she was in that state, I think its a little cruel for the other girls to sit there and cackle unnecessarily (and clearly out of spite).
23 of 26 | Posted by tv6.0 | Posted on April 1, 2008 8:11 PM
hoolia-great recap! I loved this episode as i think it really showed the character (or lack thereof) of many of the girls. I am completely off the Claire team, talk about a "shady bitch"! Not just a bitch but a shady bitch -whatever that is...And this girl is a mom? Between her completely childish behavior on the couch with Whitney and Lauren, and her gleeful "YES" when she beat out Aimee only to recall that "oops, i'm on tv and how mean did that look? Better go give the loser a hug" moment, her true colors have finally come out. I get the fact that Dominique is a pain in the ass and wierd and yes, she is a bitch, and i get the whole thing about the alarm clock, day after day, but it was ridiculous and totally immature to continue the fight into that night. The ganging up on her from the couch later that night was so unnecessary and i think shows these girls true colors. Its like lord of the flies but i guess that's how it is supposed to be on this show. And Whitney just reminds me of one of those mean girls, who likes to lead the pack and attack others. What i want to know is how come Fatima wasn't involved in this since she is always stirring up something!
I also thought the whole Nigel photo shoot was a little odd and wondered about him, but then again, if you have to get naked for photos, i guess he would be the one to get naked for! And how dumb are all these girls that they actually believe Tyra when she collapses in a heap in front of them. Haven't they watched this show before?
And finally, is it just me or is Paulina really annoying? She seldom has anything nice to say, i mean at least Tyra tries to add "constructive" criticism. I'm going to refer to her from now on as Janicelite.
Thanks to tinkerbell-i knew i recognized that cute photographer from some other show... (i obviously don't get out much and watch way too much tv!)
Keep up the good work hoolia!
24 of 26 | Posted by ayerishgrl | Posted on April 2, 2008 11:05 AM
After watching the first few episodes, I really disliked Dominique too. She was totally wrong about the alarm clock situation. But I felt that Whitney and Lauren should have stayed out of it. And Claire! Just when she was starting to grow on me she goes psycho!? She didn't have to call Dominique a be-yotch even if she acts like one and has an insanely delusional complex. But when I really started disliking Claire was when she said "I never claimed to be that big of a person." Umm way to set a great example for your daughter...
25 of 26 | Posted by Cielo_81309 | Posted on April 7, 2008 6:44 PM
After watching the first few episodes, I really disliked Dominique too. She was totally wrong about the alarm clock situation. But I felt that Whitney and Lauren should have stayed out of it. And Claire! Just when she was starting to grow on me she goes psycho!? She didn't have to call Dominique a be-yotch even if she acts like one and has an insanely delusional complex. But when I really started disliking Claire was when she said "I never claimed to be that big of a person." Umm way to set a great example for your daughter...
26 of 26 | Posted by Cielo_81309 | Posted on April 7, 2008 6:45 PM