The workday is over and here come the troops...everyone's happy to be home except our gal Alicea. It must be exhausting to be that, well, teenage all the time. I'm too old to remember. Austin calls Kelly, "Perfect" as a stay at home mom. She really kind of is. But I'd like to see her when the kid actually freaks out. Swap Zachary out with Karson, see how that plays, like swingers for the under-2 set.
Cory begs Alicea to take Karson off his hands so he can, you know, breathe for one damn minute, and she refuses. She is going to make someone a great partner someday. In crime. "You have to take care of him the rest of the night, cause I'm not. I've been doing this shit all day today and yesterday. You haven't been doing shit."
"I haven't been doing anything?" She asks him. He, and the nation, say, "No, you haven't." Unless complaining is a career and if so, I'm going to make a fortune!
"I'm not doing this all night again while you sleep your ass in," he says. We'll see how long he keeps that promise.
"You try to act like it's so hard for you, it's hard for me too," she says, rolling her eyes. Yes, sitting around is quite an Olympic feat.
"Welcome to real life," Karson's mom says. Alicea isn't even close to real life. "You go to work and you come back, and you still gotta work." You know, that makes my heart just sink. A little lower than where it already resides.
Alicea and Cory argue more about who works harder, and she finally says, "Then tell his mom to come pick him up." Good plan. But what do you do when it's your kid? Oh, right, YOUR kid won't act like that. Except he will! D'oh!
Over at Daton and Morgan's house, Morgan shows off her baboon-like manners by shoving a whole mouthful of dangling spaghetti into her mouth. Klassy with a capital K. She'll be working the pole right next to Alicea. Even baby Miley's like, "Damn, use a spoon and twirl!" They are learning that "having babies means less alone time." I'm going to give a big doyeeee shout out to parents everywhere. DOYEEEEE. "It's putting a strain on their already rocky relationship." Yes, if your relationship is rocky, nothing will stabilize it like someone who needs your attention 24/7.
Daton wants to head to the skate park and Morgan is going to tag along, much to Daton's dismay. (Daton's Dismay, the new show from the CW, coming this fall!). Miley is looking at these fools like she knows they can't do long division, but she can, and with no remainders! Clearly this baby has worked pi out 10 digits, and Daton and Morgan can only eat pie.
"What if there is nowhere for you to walk?" Daton not-so-subtly hints.
"Then I'll walk in the street," Morgan says. And I swear, Miley tips her bottle up as though she's chugging a bottle of Cuervo Gold just to get through her evening. Eat the worm, Miley, eat it! "I want to watch you skate." And watch is exactly what you will be doing.
Wow, family time...is spent very separately!
Wow, Daton is such an...average skate punk. "I've probably only worked 8 hours my entire life, let alone in one day," he voices over. Oh Gen-Whine, you make my teeth hurt.
"Having the baby around does make it more difficult. I don't get a lot of time alone with Daton...I don't even know what he wants anymore," Morgan says. He's an over-18 guy who is skate boarding. He wants a bong. "Are you ready?" she asks, standing up. Translation: I am, so let's go.
"Let me try this real quick," he says. Bet that's not the first time she's heard that.
"I don't know where I stand in this," Morgan interviews. "I'm just really confused." That seems like a pretty static state of mind for you, sweetheart.
Now it's bedtime and the teens are putting the babies to bed. But for how long...Waaaa...Oh, Karson, you are my favorite. Cory tries to get Alicea to get the baby, but you know, she's a bitch. He gets up and brings the baby back to bed.
Karson may need a feeding, but that nip ain't looking too appetizing
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Comments (5)
Oh, my God . . . I thought about watching this show, but I think if I did, I'd be smashing my TV screen trying to reach through it and smack these teens around. I'll stick to the recaps. You say what I'm sure I'd be thinking, anyway, and it's much safer for everyone this way.
1 of 5 | Posted by mandymax | Posted on July 9, 2008 5:56 AM
Yet again, DearestCrabby, I am impressed at your ability to recap this show, much less to even watch it. I bow to you. *bow*
:)
2 of 5 | Posted by teri00 | Posted on July 9, 2008 11:16 AM
I wanted to strangle Alicea when I was watching this. She is a waste of a human being. I am sure this show does not get American Idol type ratings, but if I knew just 20 people saw me acting like that I would be mortified. My friend suggested that they send Alicea to Iraq. That would be perfect for her. Get her out of here!
3 of 5 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on July 10, 2008 1:14 PM
Do you ever see those women at the store and think to yourself, "Damn, when did you stop caring?"
Yes, now you know.
I've been that woman. I had all four of my kids within six years and I think I wore a ponytail for most of the 90s.
Does anyone besides me think that the parents of these babies are drinking bong water or something? I picture Michael Keaton's face on "Mr. Mom" when the punkrock teen shows up at the door all, "Dude. I'm the BABYsitter..." and he slams the door in her face.
4 of 5 | Posted by TheVoiceofReason | Posted on July 11, 2008 7:41 AM
I am afraid that due to lack of feedback there won't be anymore recaps of Baby Borrowers...and that would be a tragedy! So better late than never, I'm posting to say thanks for this recap and keep up the good work my Dear Crabby!!
5 of 5 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on July 14, 2008 9:59 AM