Testimonials

Alicea is dealing with daughters of Satan and makes Hannah-the-terror go to her bedroom. She says she's going to ignore her which I have to tell you, I'm sort of on board with. Seems like that bad behavior gets a lot of attention and ignoring it might solve part of the problem. The other part would probably be solved with a therapist or a dad that didn't run away, although can you blame him? Hannah is wrapped in a blanket and is screaming her head off. Okay, I probably would have checked in on her at this point.

Skip the timeouts and go straight for the lobotomy, Nurse Ratchet!

Mom watching says, "She's acting out to get attention, I think." Oh, you're a genius. "It would help if Alicea could re-direct that energy." Why give her attention for being a spoiled brat? Direct her attention to what? My paddle? Did I mention paddles?

Paddles for every level of the anger you cannot manage.
I particularly like the one with the picture in it. Is that Grandma?

Mom stops by for a quick chat to help Cory and Alicea, and this "intervention" goes way better than Alicea's first one. She suggests engaging her in an activity to take her mind of things. Like a paddling? "She might just need something to do." Well, if she could play without pounding on her sister, that might work. I mean, kids hit, but hers is pretty violent and angry. If anyone knows this mother, recommend therapy before someone gets killed, like, you know, the mother.

Jordan is working with Sara on math problems while Sasha pulls out a dinner of Doritos. Excellent! Adopt me! He tells her he'll give her $5 to finish her math problems. Sara is smart and she and Jordan are really getting along. Sara interviews she'd like to stay longer because it's so fun. He owes her $5.

She's away from her parents for the first time and her rebellious
move is...math? Enjoy being dateless on prom night mathlete

Back at Kelsey and Sean's house, Kelsey is slapping some delicious bacon in a frying pan. Good for you! I'll take a BLT minus the L and T (they just take up space better used for mayo). "This week, we need to make Kelsey eat some vegetables," one Hanson says to Sean, and he totally agrees with the kid. Damn, taking sides against your girlfriend with a pre-teen is pretty low. But so is Sean's IQ, so we should probably let him have it. Lord knows he won't be getting any sex soon.

Sean interviews that Kelsey knows he doesn't like her eating habits. "This lifestyle she's leading isn't good," he says. Kesley, you know a great way to drop 160+ pounds really fast? Dump Sean. The kids watch her eating pancakes as though she's taken down an antelope and is eating its entrails while it's still alive and writhing. Damn, kids, it's PANCAKES! Although I will admit she seems to be making syrup soup.

"Geez, lighten up on the syrup," one of the Hansons says to her. Yeah, Kelsey, just pour yourself a glass instead. Maybe she's trying to go into a self-induced sugar-shock coma just to get away from this family, like I'm doing it now. Over in the viewing center, the mother looks shocked her bratty kids just said this. You know you told them to say that. Poor, chubby Kelsey never had a chance.

Is that syrup on the ceiling? I'll lick it off later.

Back at Daton and Morgan's house, Seth is up waaaay past bedtime thanks to the fort-building skills of Morgan. Daton wants to put Seth to bed, but Morgan is all like, "Seriously, don't you like, you know, like want to be, like, a kid again?" No, I think Daton wants to learn how to be a parent, and not to you. So Morgan says, "Daton wants you to go to sleep." Way to parent together, Morgan. Nothing like a united front, not.

These are the bestest parents ever! Because they're kids!

Daton gets pissed and goes upstairs to sleep, without Morgan, to "get out of the whole situation for a little bit." Something tells me he'll be leaving this situation a lot after the cameras stop rolling.

Damn, Daton is being a total hardass about my fort. No fun! Just like parenting!

The next morning parents leave for work, with some of them exchanging places with their significant others. I love Kelly's, "Good luck," and door slam which was only missing a "M#$*%& F#$*#&!!!" at the end. That would have been so hilarious if they had to bleep her out for like 10 seconds straight.

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Posted in Baby Borrowers by DearCrabby at 12:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (10)
Last Comment: mandymax on Jul 24, 2008 05:40 AM.