David's mom shows up and asks how it went, and Kelly has to fess up she and Asshat broke up. She says, "We wanted him to enjoy being here." Well, let me say you get a great big George W. "Mission Accomplished" on that one, boneheads. The best part of about this scene is when David's mom asks them how long they think they will wait to have kids and they both say without hesitation, "A LONG TIME." Good! You've learned something! Who knew reality TV could actually do some good?
Now it's my headache that's this big!
"I realize you have to figure yourself out first before bringing kids into the mix," Kelly says. Okay, she's my hero 2.0 for this episode. She DOES get it. What a proud moment for me as the recapper. Hugs for everyone...but don't touch Kelly! Asshat looks like death. Jesus, take a nap already.
Snowy's mom shows up and she breathes out flowers and sunshine! Awesome. Snowy was a great kid, 'nuff said. Renee's mom shows up and looks just like her. This is totally a Ned Flanders family. Nice, smart, well-mannered, and productive citizens. Good for them! And don't leave Idaho, the rest of us are really, really mean.
Hiddley-ho teen-o-reenos! Ned and I are
so blessed with our God-fearing Renee.
Kelly and Asshat are having a heart-to-heart conversation. He says, "It's the fight between logic and love that's going on in my head right now." First of all, that fight is like the Middle East so don't plan on any cease-fires in your lifetime or the lifetimes of any of your offspring every in the history of the world, and second, I think the fight in your head is actually flies buzzing around trying to get out.
Asshat wants them to be together and forget everything that happened yesterday, except he forgot one thing. Women never forget anything. Ever. Ever! But then he says logically, if you love each other, stuff like that shouldn't happen. He feels like they aren't together but not broken up, either. They are lost. Kelly starts to cry and he sits on the sofa hugging her. "I still love you. I still look at you like my girlfriend, it's hard not to." Yeesh. This is sad because they really are breaking up. Poor kids.
You turn down that rock and or roll, you damn kids!
Next week? The elderly join them! Special guest? John McCain as Johnny McCrabbypants. He needs his food mashed and likes dinner at 4pm. Hope they all need lots of pills! See you then!
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Comments (4)
Crap! The whole teen parenting thing started getting less and less hilarious once the borrowed kids hit their tweens! How much fun can old people be???
1 of 4 | Posted by mandymax | Posted on July 30, 2008 6:08 AM
Great recap, Crabby! I laughed all over again. I LOOOOVE Breakfast Club. When I first saw that Penney's commercial, I thought they were remaking it and salivated a little bit, but a remake with today's crop of young actors would probably just piss me off anyway so its for the best.
It was great seeing Alicia and Cory vindicated with that Mom. That Sam kid is such a douche.
As much as I dislike Morgan and Daton, it was seriously uncomfortable listening to them and I felt really bad for their great kid being left alone to play servant with Morgan while she yammered on about how she was being a single parent and working and yada yada. Please bitch, its been a DAY. You've got a house you could never afford in the real world, you're being paid $100 for work that would normally pay half that for an 8 hr day, you're coming home to a kid that cleans of his own accord AND you don't have anyone telling you what a complete f*&%-up you really are. THIS IS NOT WHAT BEING A SINGLE PARENT IS REALLY LIKE.
Not that Austin is any great catch, but he is so much closer to being one than Kelly that I give him extra points. That girl is a complete nutcase and ruuude to boot. I'm pretty sure she hit him when they were on the bed and he said look what you're doing to me and the next shot had him holding her hands. Methinks the abuse comes from her, not him. And then she tries snuggling up to him like nothing had happened and obviously thought he was just going to melt all over her. When he didn't she just walks away. That is one cold bitch, right there. Austin should be VERY thankful that this happened because his life would be absolutely miserable with her. 'Course he'll probably change his mind and go back with her, poor kid.
2 of 4 | Posted by Splotchie | Posted on July 30, 2008 8:12 AM
Enjoyed the punking of Sam's mom.
Kelly is so my first wife. Part of it is her diet - way too much sugar and not enough anything else. For sure, Austin was holding her hands to keep her from slapping, punching and/or stabbing him (trust me).
Eddie - would you like to be adopted? I have a pool and an automatic dish waher.
I'm sure the teens were all coached to act up - at least at first.
I don't get the point of the old folks part, either. It isn't like the teens will ever have a choice about their parents getting older (unless you consider parentacide a "choice").
Great recap!
3 of 4 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on July 30, 2008 9:45 AM
DC,
Your recaps crack me up! I've laughed so much on every single "kid-stages" episode (can't say that happened last night). I can relate to what you're saying on so many levels and have to compliment your excellent writing, comments & photo captions, etc...
Well Done! :)
4 of 4 | Posted by lijjy | Posted on July 31, 2008 10:40 AM