Midget tells her that the best thing to do is come clean and start over and Amber says "The thing is, my time is precious." and she starts to say some other shit but mumbles and then says she wishes Kayla was there so she could put Trashley in her place. Midget tells her that Amber just wants Kayla to fight her battle. At just that moment, you won't believe this, the phone rings. Yep, its Kayla.

Kayla asks to speak to Amber and Midget gives Amber a warning look and Amber immediately begins to whine about "them" and saying how she can't say much. They are all lovey dovey and I'm trying to figure out when that happened. Kayla mentions something about a necklace and Midget grabs the phone and tells Kayla she's still mad at her. Kayla screeches "Why are you mad at me?" and Midget giggles and Kayla says "I miss you." Huh? Midget misses her too but says its an up and down street because she is still mad about their fight. Kayla says thats over and bygones are bygones but she doesn't care for anyone else in that house. She tells them to stay strong and don't let them other ho's get to them. Could it be? I actually miss her.

Midget goes into the kitchen to attempt to speak to Geezer Bait like a grown ass woman. Apparently Geezer Bait needs a diaper change cause she is grouchy and wants nothing to do with Midget or her apologies. Bait tells her that she didn't have anything to say last night and Midget tells her thats because the things she was being accused of saying were not things she actually said so why would she comment about it. Ouch. My head hurts. Midget says who said I said anything about Kevin and Tiff announces it was none other than Trashley.

I want you to apologize for what you know you know that you know, ya know?
Then they go back and forth about some crap and Geezer Bait yells at Midget that she wants her to apologize for what she said not what she doesn't know she said. I'm pretty sure that even if I wasn't sick, that would make no sense.

Whoseafudgeawha???
Midget tells us that now she knows what guys feel like when a girl is yelling at them that you know what you did wrong and the girl expects the guy to read her mind. Midget decides its time for a house meeting. Boston takes this opportunity to tell us that the Ambuh's don't get it. They don't want to talk to them anymore, they dug their own grave and they are gonna have to deal with it. Why is she speaking?
So the Flatulent Five decide that during this meeting , instead of putting their big girl panties on and acting like grown women, they will just sit there silently. Sarah's nasty ass tells us that they have decided to do this because thats what the Amber's did the night before. No, the Amber's couldn't get a word in with all five of you greasy stinky banshees screaming like a bunch of loons. Oh and Sarah also says "Sorry Amber, were a little smarter than you." You aren't even smart enough to bathe on a daily basis so shut it fly trap.

I will speak slowlyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
House meeting! Midget starts off by saying she doesn't know all that was said but that she knows she didn't say some of those things and offers an apology for anything she did say that hurt anyones feelings. She tells them she loves each and every one of them and Sarah either rolls her eyes or she got a whiff of herself and almost passed out.

Seriously that smell is following me!
No one says a word and Tiff just grins. Amber starts apologizing and the problem with her apology is that it looks like she is barely able to keep from cracking up. It's fake as all hell and its obvious. She tells Sarah that she doesn't think she's a whore at all. And she giggles. Crickets.

I'm being totally serious you guys, tee hee..
She continues by telling Ashley she's a wonderful person and a cool girl and fun to hang out with. If I were Midget I'd scoot a little farther down that couch because any second a giant lightening bolt is gonna smash into Amber's pimpled ass head.
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Comments (22)
Hey Cherie Bear,
Loved the recap this week, it's my favorite by far. I wait all week to see whatcha gotta say about these f*ckwits. I am kinda skeerd for next week though. I don't want my Midget to get a beat down. Her's is mah fave!
I am mad about Tiff. Now she really has earned the title Tiffmonster. I am bummed out about that. You are right about Sarah, she does look like she puts out a foul odor. I grimmace every time I see her. *gags*
Hope you feel better soon, and keep up the good work. You are the best!
-WG
1 of 22 | Posted by Wonder Girl | Posted on February 28, 2009 4:36 AM
Cherie great job! I think your recaps may be the only reason i am still watching this show! I swear its a good thing i don't have heart problems because i know this show makes my blood pressure go up. i would throw stuff at my tv if i didn't just buy a new one. these girls are so ridiculous. the flatulent five seriously got mad at the ambers for talking to someone they didn't aprove of. And when did whitney start hating on kayla after telling her over and over "I gotcha backbone, I gotcha backbone"? Grrr i really hate these bitches. if midget wasn't on this show i would have given up a long time ago.
2 of 22 | Posted by flowie623 | Posted on February 28, 2009 7:57 AM
yeah I was waiting for more with Kayla. Yelling. Kicking. Attacking. Scratching. Something. And I wanted her to come back to the house. We need something that isn't fab 5 related.
3 of 22 | Posted by badboysclub | Posted on February 28, 2009 8:40 AM
I see you won't talk shit about the Amber M. any more !!! Since she has become your personal friend!!!
4 of 22 | Posted by ceecee | Posted on February 28, 2009 9:40 AM
Oh Tiff, I mean ceecee, don't get your boxers in a wad. As soon as Midget does something stupid I'll be glad to point it out. Until then I have my hands full with the Flatulent Five. Does this mean you love me no longer?
5 of 22 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on February 28, 2009 9:44 AM
Cherie write some more details about Kayla! lol good ones! Cuz I love kayla. Anyway are you going to recap the reunion and other reunions or talk shows or whatever they'll be on? Please say you will! You are just too funny! Man you have to recap some other shows! You made my day!
6 of 22 | Posted by badboysclub | Posted on February 28, 2009 12:39 PM
I am flattered you think I am Tiffany but sorry I am not!! However,I am fan of the show have read you blog for quite a while !! Anyone who reads everything you write and your comments can tell who you favor. I just point it out! Can I not do that!!!
7 of 22 | Posted by ceecee | Posted on February 28, 2009 5:51 PM
Ceecee you can point out anything you want to. Thats what the comment sections for. I've said over and over that Midget is my favorite. What I'm wondering is why that bothers you so much? Why don't we just agree to disagree? Come on, group hug!
8 of 22 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on February 28, 2009 6:21 PM
As you see i keep coming back to read you! so I think I've hugged you awhile ago! I just like when you wrote picked on everyone that is all! Sorry that my picking that out bothers you so much. Plus I have the biggest lesbo crush on Tiffany!!!
9 of 22 | Posted by ceecee | Posted on February 28, 2009 6:54 PM
LOL I'm coming back to read if anyone has responded to me and here you people are just plain ignoring me! How rude! Just kidding. Wow for a moment I thought there would be fights in this comment section.
10 of 22 | Posted by badboysclub | Posted on February 28, 2009 9:08 PM
FIGHT! FIGHT! CeeCee & Cherie are having a Fight!!!
11 of 22 | Posted by chooch850 | Posted on February 28, 2009 10:11 PM
Can't we all just get along? :)
12 of 22 | Posted by PottyMouth | Posted on March 1, 2009 4:26 AM
Cherie, love the reviews, and I can forgive that Amber is your favorite... LOL, she is a riot in the confessionals (save for that vapid Amber show), but Tiffany has a point when she says that Midget pretends to be dumb and has no response when confronted.... I am a little bored with the Flatulent Five and the Ambers. Something has got to give and prove why this is the BGC.
As far as Ailea, I love that's she such a nutjob and the fact that she slept with Fazil is amusing. And Roland, the Irish singer, was so hideous.... So she's no longer Geezer Bait, (loved Kevin's drunk dialing) maybe she's now Fazil Bait?
13 of 22 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on March 1, 2009 6:20 AM
Sorry badboysclub, I didn't mean to ignore you. I was just traumatized that ceecee was upset with me. I don't know what I'll be doing after this show but I will cover the reunion show. Only I'll call it the Midget Show and I'll only talk about her. Just kidding. Tee hee.
Hey chooch, ya big trouble maker, don't make me slap that ass!
Thanks for reading guys!
14 of 22 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on March 1, 2009 8:56 AM
chhhhherie.
im with you... ceecee is tiff, or is a close friend of tiff's or is obsessed with tiff.... our midget amber was right to call her out on it recently after the show!
15 of 22 | Posted by hollagirl2 | Posted on March 1, 2009 6:29 PM
SO MUCH WORD on Sarah's funkiness! She always looks so greasy and smelly, like she smells like pee or coochie or something nasty.
16 of 22 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on March 2, 2009 7:31 AM
Ugh, I hate The Amber's as much as the next person, but I do think they are getting a raw deal. that being said, the tape/clothing prank was HILARIOUS and I kept thinking that if The Amber's had thought of it first, they would have acted the exact same way.
I also don't get where the animosity towards Kayla comes in. Yes, she is ghetto and she did leave, but those backstabbing bee-yotches let her go and didn't say a word to Midget, who was fighting too! And the fact that they've made up and get along speaks volumes.
And for the record, I actually like Sarah!
17 of 22 | Posted by jadestarla | Posted on March 2, 2009 11:38 AM
Cherie
Great recap, love the caption for the picture in the confessional "Please make big shiny things go away!" Utterly perfect... Sorry folks but I am a Midget fan as well. Used to be a Tiff fan, ceecee but ever since she went over to the irrational Flab Five have not been able to stand her.
Looking forward to the smack down next week.
18 of 22 | Posted by gasmreader | Posted on March 2, 2009 12:59 PM
I just want to say that I think the Ambers have gotten screwed over by a pack of crazy women.
There is a ridiculous double standard going on, and Tiff has seriously started to become crazy.
Right now, I wouldn.t consider any of these women as my friend, but Midget would probably be the funnest to hang out with.
19 of 22 | Posted by lennonwhore | Posted on March 3, 2009 8:20 PM
cherie you should recap the bonus footage lol. ALthough I guess that's a little too much but some of it is just good material for you to make fun of like Ailea getting drunk and being angry at amber B holder Amber M's purse.
20 of 22 | Posted by badboysclub | Posted on March 4, 2009 2:38 PM
Dear Cherie,
I love your recaps and I can not wait for this weeks recap about the trip to Cancun.
21 of 22 | Posted by amiddla1969 | Posted on March 5, 2009 11:24 AM
I detest the Flabby Five. They are nothing but bullies, and there's nothing I abhor more than a bully. They behave like a pack of hyenas, sniffing out what they consider to be the weakest link, and work together to bring them down. They are absolutely awful. I am so saddened by Tiffany's behavior, as she seemed so reasonable in the beginning. I have no respect for any of them. I actually prefer the Ambers (at least Midget). Sad. And pathetic. And I wish Tanisha and Kayla would come back to kick all 5 of the sad, tacky, weak, two-faced asses. Bitches.
22 of 22 | Posted by eagle0021 | Posted on March 5, 2009 8:52 PM