Perez asks Sarah why she didn't get along with StubFace and she says its because he was too much like a male Amber. Then Perez tells StubFace to get off the stage, he's done with him because he wouldn't take off his shirt. As StubFace goes back into the audience, Perez call's Amber out on saying that she and StubFace did not have sex in the house. Since he knows she's lying he asks StubFace. And StubFace says "That wasn't no candy wrapper on the floor." hahhaha busted!
Perez says "It's the Amber's vs the Fab Five and me in the middle." Kayla says "Hey what about me?" and Perez says "Bitch shut up." and they go to commercial. LOL.
They're back and someone has a question. "Whitney, tell me why one person in America other than people from Boston give a flying fuck that you are from Boston?" Audience laughs and applauds. Boston says she's proud of her city and then names all the sports teams she can think of. He asks what part of Boston and she admits she's actually from NORTH of Boston. He looks incredulous and repeats "You aren't even from Boston?" and she blither blathers on about how she is but she isn't but its a long story and zzzzzzzzz.
Perez will now update us on what the girls are doing now. First up is Bait. She is studying to be a nurse. Oh dear Lord.
Midget says she wants to join the Peace Corps so that maybe anything bad she has done will be balanced out.
Amber is going to MORTUARY SCHOOL. I had to rewind that a few times. I mean no disrespect at all to the profession but...damn. She's also moving to Phoenix to be closer to Midget.
Boston is in school. "I major in biology. I major in finance and I minor in physics. Perez asks her if maybe she should take anger management lol.
Trashley is still managing the hair salon she worked at before. And being celibate. No seriously. She claims after leaving BGC she lost her sex drive. Told ya her hormone injections were off. He then thanks her for getting rid of her chola eyebrows lol.
Tiff it seems goes around to high schools talking to young ladies. Motivational speaking is next for her. She talks to them about anger management and turning a bad girl into a good girl. Excuse me for a sec. Hahahahahahahaa! What's next, Michael Vick becoming the new Dog Whisperer?
Sarah works at a bar downtown, working bottle service. If that means what I think it means I'm sure it "fits" her perfectly.
Kayla is heading back to college as well and is always searching and learning to be better. She says that everyone on that stage is intelligent. Perez says "Intelligent people will fuck a bitch up sometimes."
They show a montage of the actual good times that were had in the house. Lots of drinking, giggling, licking whip cream off each other.
Perez tells us we have come to the end. "If there's one thing we've learned tonight though it's be a bad girl, but not too bad. And remember whomever you are with wherever you are at, bounce up on it!"
Everybody's bouncing and hugging and laughing. He points at Bait and says "I hate you bitch." Then Bait goes to hug Perez and he tells her not to touch him. She hugs him anyway and he tells her "Bitch I am not joking, you are disgusting. Seriously. I mean it's one thing to get angry and pull someone's hair, its another thing to get angry, pull her hair, then kick her and gloat about it." I almost felt sorry for her but then I remember she's a waste of sperm. Suck it Bait.
Lastly Perez asks Tiff and Midget to hug it out and they do.
Part of me is sad. I really will miss these girls and hope they all go on to be better people for having been a part of BGC. And that none of them fire bomb my house. This recap was very late because I have had to make some tough decisions about my Mom and she is now living with me. My advice to all you 'bad girls" out there. Stop sweating the small stuff. Life has a way of knocking the living shit out of you so enjoy the good parts and stop trying to find the bad. Believe me, it will find you all on its on so until it does, live, laugh and love! The Dr. Phil portion of this recap is now over lol.
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Comments (16)
Cherie!!!
Loved the recap. I am sooo sad that BGC is over too. I lived for your blogs for the past few months. Congrats on the new addition! I am sure Midget will be honored that you named your new lil kitty after her.
I posted this recap over on the Oxy board, so you don't have to do it yourself this time...unless you wanna.
My favorite part is where you were talking about Sarah and how sleeping on a bed of turds would be no different than sleeping at her house. ROTFLMAO!!! I love you Cherie you always make me laugh. Midget said that she loved this recap and that you were "sp right on" about everything. I have to agree.
Well take care, and I hope you will still be the BGC recapper nevt season. Until then, I will continue to get my weekly dose of Cherie on the Kardashian recap.
Smooches,
Katie
1 of 16 | Posted by Wonder Girl | Posted on April 9, 2009 2:15 AM
Cherie, thanks to you I started watching a show I never thought I'd watch, and actually enjoyed it! Thanks for all the laughs!
SWAK, PottyMouth
2 of 16 | Posted by PottyMouth | Posted on April 9, 2009 3:41 AM
Cherie,
Love, love, love your recaps!! I didn't find out about them until later in the season but after reading the first one, I became hooked!!! I love your razor sharp wit and wicked sense of humor!! This season of BGC was kraaa zeee!! I stayed so pissed through most of it. Thanks so much for telling those crazy bitch ass bullies what I couldn't!! I LOVED the nics that you gave the girls--so dead on!! Midget was my favorite, she definitely shined over all of them. I loved that you named your new "baby" after her!! Thanks so much for adding so much fun to this season. I am now a life long fan!
Hugs & kisses,
Shout
3 of 16 | Posted by Shout Out | Posted on April 9, 2009 6:37 AM
I didn't really watch the season, only read the recaps, but it seemed like to me Tiff is bipolar or somethng. Sometimes she was so logical (esp at the beginning) and then other times she would make no sense and fly off the handle. It was really sad. I was so excited to see Amber is moving closer to Midget. I'm glad those two developed a real friendship, the friendship b/t the other girls seemd it was out of conveinence and dislike for the Ambers.
And what Perez said to Geezer Bait, LOL, how awesome.
4 of 16 | Posted by cansnuts | Posted on April 9, 2009 7:06 AM
OMG Cherie! You almost made me piss myself, once again, from laughter!
I'm gonna miss BGC, and hope to remember to come back for S4 (might need an email reminder, lol).
The new addition to your family is so CUTE! :) Makes me wanna go out and get a kitten ('coz I already have a weiner dog).
I can't pick a favorite part of your recap this time, 'coz it was ALL great! I loved it ALL! And I'm definatley gonna miss it, lots 'n shit!
Hope things look up for the better for you with your problems in real life - I know how that goes!
XOXO
-BGCFan_April
5 of 16 | Posted by BGCfan_April | Posted on April 9, 2009 8:37 AM
I enjoyed your recaps from the Bad Girls Club. These past two weeks I kept coming on here everyday to see if you had the reunion show done yet. I love your recaps ! They are hilarious and I enjoy the heck out of them.
I have read all of them and I have to say you are a comedic genuis. Sometimes I laughed so hard that my sides started to hurt. Good Job !
Thanks for your recaps again Cheri ! I am forever a fan of yours !
6 of 16 | Posted by candicanestealer | Posted on April 9, 2009 11:03 AM
When Perez Hilton thinks you are a pathetic lowlife whore, you really have hit rock bottom.
7 of 16 | Posted by VegasDarling | Posted on April 9, 2009 11:11 AM
Thanks again, Cherie! Enjoyed reading you this season and I hope you're back next season! You rock! :)
I enjoyed this recap, the kitten at the end was the icing on the cake! TOO CUTE! Glad you named her Midget as well.
Take care!
8 of 16 | Posted by prettydark | Posted on April 9, 2009 12:14 PM
Take care of yourself and your mom, Cherie
9 of 16 | Posted by deemarie | Posted on April 9, 2009 12:47 PM
Cherie-
LOVE your recaps, and I am so glad that you did one for the reunion... Can we discuss you taking on America's Next Top Model?
On a side note, I also loved how you too saw things from Cookies perspective that Tiffany may in fact be CeeCee....
Stop by the message board more, I'd love to see your comments there!
Sara
10 of 16 | Posted by Sara_Shark | Posted on April 9, 2009 1:30 PM
Thanks for the laughs!Amazing job recapping this season!
I was mad that no one called Bait out on how she told the cops that Boston was the one who beat up Midget. The fab five seemed to conveniently forget that ever happened.
11 of 16 | Posted by notcreative | Posted on April 9, 2009 2:49 PM
I'll miss your BGC recaps for sure, and (some of) these bad girls.
What's the deal with these girls going off on each other by yelling nonsensical, irrelevant stuff like, "You wear flip-flops! You and your damn Seventeen magazines! I hate your earrings!" (All right, I made some of that up.) Is it just Tiff or did they all do that?
Best wishes to you and your mom. Your kitty is adorable. I had a precious, cute lil kitten like her once who I called Gigi. She ended up being a 16 pound "large and in charge" type. LOL
12 of 16 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on April 9, 2009 8:23 PM
I actually felt bad for Ailea since I felt she was really honest about her feelings. I can understand that you can apologize for behavior and really feel you were right in your thinking.... I mean, things got out of hand in Mexico and PH was out of control for being such a dick to her. It was unnecessary and pitiful and he was only picking on her, cause he would have gotten his ass kicked by Tiff if he pulled that shit with her.
13 of 16 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on April 9, 2009 9:57 PM
Love the comment you made about Tiff talking to girls about anger management..and how Michael Vick will become the new dog whisperer..that was sheer genius !
14 of 16 | Posted by pyper | Posted on April 10, 2009 9:45 AM
I did NOT feel bad for Ailea when Perez bitched her out, he said everything I was thinking, I
15 of 16 | Posted by heykate7 | Posted on April 10, 2009 11:13 AM
I'm a little disappointed Perez didn't show Boston the footage of Ailea naming her when speaking to the police in Cancun. And I would have loved if they showed Boston the clip of her threatening someone with a shoe and then saying in Boston they only hit with their fists.
I'm also surprised that Perez, who normally makes a big deal about people smoking, didn't comment that perhaps the division in the BGC might have had something to do with the fact the Fab Five spent most of their time on the patio smoking while it seemed both Ambers were non-smokers and therefore not out there all the time. You got 5 girls huddled in a smoking area who like to talk trash, of course they are gonna talk about the girls who aren't out there to defend themselves. Wait a minute -I think that is the Kelly Bundy game, someone goes in the bathroom and while she is gone everyone talks badly about her.
Anyway I have truly enjoyed your recaps! I only discovered them halfway thru the season so I look forward to going back and reading them all - but you have really done an incredible job. I think the recaps are better than the actual show!
Good luck with your Mom and congrats on the new kitty!
16 of 16 | Posted by trixie | Posted on April 10, 2009 12:39 PM