Well I hope all you guys had a great holiday and got all you wanted for Christmas. I got a new computer and a wheel barrow to tote around the extra ass I grew. Maybe I should have asked Santa for an exercise bike instead. Screw it. Typing is exercise right? Welcome back to the Bad Girls Club!
Tonights episode begins with Kayla flash backing to the previous night. You know the one where she was supposed to strip for money but got so hideously drunk off her ass that she just got naked and then puked? And was then trucked off to the hospital? Apparently they let her come home.
How'd the floor get on my ass?
Don't ya just love people who do stupid things and then say "that wasn't me". Well Kayla says "That wasn't Kayla y'all." Hate to burst your bubble of delusion but ya huh! That seriously WAS you. You got drunk off your ass and made a fool out of yourself...again.
It was my evil twin Krazayla!
Tiff starts telling Kayla all the stupid shit she said and did. Like saying she'd been to a mental hospital before and also showing the doc her tiny lil' titties. Kayla doesn't remember a lot but she does remember going to the hospital and telling the doc she wanted to fuck him. Can't fault her there. Having no insurance myself, I may have to try that one next time I OD.
In another part of the mad house, Geezer Bait, aka Ailea has had a thought. She thinks the girls should have a "Flashdance" moment. You know wear the off the shoulder shirts and leg warmers. And dance around. Boston thinks this would be so funny and people would just stare. Yeah, pretty sure they'd stare anyway.
Wouldn't it be cool to dress really old like the 80's?
And just by the by, what the hell is up with all the oh the 60's are back, the 80's are back? How can something come back when it never freakin goes away? It was painful enough the first time. The 80's I mean. I ain't old enough to remember the 60's but damn that shit looked gross enough in pictures. Sorry to all you hippies out there. Wait no I'm not! Take a bath and get a job and put on some goddamn shoes!
The Ambers start whispering about how the other twits are acting retarded. Ironic no? Amber tells Midget that they are dressing like the 80's and Midget astutely points out that thats how Geezer Bait dresses anyway. LOL Midget. Have I mentioned she's my fav? They both agree that the other girls are stupid.
She's way stoopider than me!
The GoGo's depart the house and as soon as they get in the car, Geezer Bait, Boston, and Sarah start gossiping.
We got the beat.
Geezer Bait thinks that if the Amber's and Kayla team up that the Amber's will hide behind Kayla. Because Kayla has a strong personality and the Amber's just take a backseat. Uhh did they miss the episode where Midget was basically begging Kayla to whip her ass? That girl is tough. Or retarded. Or both.
Ailea decides that she will try to be cordial to Midget even though she can't stand her. And in the next sentence she says "The next time that 4 foot blonde elf ever says a word to me and it's negative, I will step on her." Ha, an elf stepped on by a beaver. That I'd pay to see. Not money. But I'd pay attention. And laugh. Especially when the elf kicks the beaver's ass.Sarah tells her that she should convey her feelings to Midget. Sarah is trying to start shit. I may have to like her now.
Back at the house Amber B. is with that stubby faced dude she met at a bar. Greg.
Stubface
She says he's genuine and wants to know her for her and meet her family. Uh huh, OR, he wants to be on tv and convince everyone he's not gay by appearing to bang a skank while on tv. She shows him a picture of her Mom and he says "Your Mom is hot". Amber thinks its sweet. If my husband had said my Mom was hot I would have puked. Especially since she's in her 70's.
He wants to do my Mom. How sweet!
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Comments (14)
Didn't have time to read the recap yet, but the headline caught my attention. Didn't you hear? Ass fat is GOOD for you (belly fat is bad).
Do these spandex pants make my ass look healthy?
1 of 14 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on January 8, 2009 11:41 AM
Another great recap! My niece is staring at me like WTF because I am LMAO at a computer.
Ailea wasn't going to do anything, she kept looking back as she was yelling to see when the girls would come and "hold her back". LBN maybe the blank stare wasn't a good idea since that one was just out of the crazy house.
2 of 14 | Posted by badgirlamber | Posted on January 8, 2009 12:15 PM
I had a different take on the Geezer/Bait sitch. I thought that when she revealed the crazy part about herself and having been committed, that he would reveal something about himself. Geezer wants power over her and she willingly gives it up and he willingly takes it. Of course, their relationship won't last and she'll lie on the reunion show that they are still together.
I feel bad for Bait in this sense, though: she is SO NEEDY that there is no way that Geezer can emotionally satisfy her. Neither could every member of the Green Bay Packers football team!
As far as the Tiff meltdown, I knew that was simmering and waiting for her to explode on Kayla. I'm ready for more of it next week. Kayla got punked, put in her place, and chumped by "the big bad." Tiff looks similar to Hoopz from FOL1 and I Love Money.
I totally missed the gay subtext with Greg at the beginning, mainly because I was playing around on Facebook. LOL. I just thought he wanted to fuck Amber, and once he did, he lost interest.
I figured he lived with some roommates or at a frat house and just told her some shit she wanted to hear: that she was special, beautiful, and their sex would be tawdry and meaningless because he was in a relationship. I didn't think Greg was so much a Stubface, as much as he was a Roided Up version of Tom Brady.
3 of 14 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on January 8, 2009 12:45 PM
"Wait, they have a freakin dildo machine but not a washer and dryer? Hey Oxygen, rude!"
TRUE DAT! Hahaha!
I kind of love Midget, too. She's funny but knows how to push buttons. And I like that she stands up to KC's crap.
4 of 14 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on January 8, 2009 1:21 PM
"Wait, they have a freakin dildo machine but not a washer and dryer? Hey Oxygen, rude!"
TRUE DAT! Hahaha!
I kind of love Midget, too. She's funny but knows how to push buttons. And I like that she stands up to KC's crap.
5 of 14 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on January 8, 2009 1:23 PM
"Wait, they have a freakin dildo machine but not a washer and dryer? Hey Oxygen, rude!"
TRUE DAT! Hahaha!
I kind of love Midget, too. She's funny but knows how to push buttons. And I like that she stands up to KC's crap.
6 of 14 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on January 8, 2009 1:27 PM
Coming soon on Fox Reality: 8 emotionally scarred twenty somethings and 8 skeevy 60 year olds are forced to live in a house together. Now we'll find out what happens when people stop being polite and start being real creepy.
7 of 14 | Posted by DrJerkass | Posted on January 9, 2009 4:35 AM
i love tiffany. it's about time! kayla is clearly terrified of tiff and want's to be her frienemy so badly but tiffany knows what she would be getting into and has tried to steer clear of the crazy but this time... she VALIDLY went over the edge!
can't wait for next week when i have my fingers crossed that kayla will be kicked off the show!!!!
8 of 14 | Posted by kaf0220 | Posted on January 9, 2009 11:28 AM
You guys should check out Amber B.'s blog at Oxygen. She swears she didn't sleep with Stubface! Hahahaha!
DrJerkass I would totally watch that show. And recap it.
I too love Tiff and was glad to see her let loose.
Midget congrats on the newest addition to your family!
Love you guys!
9 of 14 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on January 9, 2009 9:24 PM
Cherie!!! You might be busy, but hell we have been waiting long enough! I tell everyone about your blog! Do you live in New York City?
10 of 14 | Posted by badgirlamber | Posted on January 19, 2009 2:19 PM
Great job Cherie.
11 of 14 | Posted by dr.birdie | Posted on January 19, 2009 3:44 PM
Midget the recaps page has been invaded by aliens and was screwy for several days. Episode 5 has been up since last Wednesday. Click on Recaps on the front page and go to page two. Or three lol. And no I don't live in New York. I live in Georgia.
Thanks Doc!
12 of 14 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on January 20, 2009 8:30 AM
Where in this recap does it say that Kayla left the show????
13 of 14 | Posted by chooch850 | Posted on January 21, 2009 2:21 AM
It doesn't chooch. The site ate the recap after this one. She left in last weeks episode. If you go to the recaps page its on the second page near the bottom. That recap kinda got lost with all the crap the site went thru last week.
14 of 14 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on January 21, 2009 8:41 AM