Unfortunately, while I managed to catch Thursday's season premiere, I missed the casting special which aired Wednesday night, because I forgot to move it ahead of Lost on my TiVo's Season Pass Manager. So, how 'bout Eko staring down EdHill's giant moving, thinking fart? What will the writers of Lost pull out of their collective asses next? I'm guessing they'll say Ana Lucia's in such a foul mood because all her eggs are rotting and no one will mount her.
It's really too bad I missed the casting special, because from the few clips they showed before tonight's episode, it looks like it was a real hoot. Take this guy, for instance. When asked how geeky he would rate himself on a scale of 1-10, he answered, "a solid E to the Pi." Personally, I think he looks more like a solid "Bo to the Bice", but that's just me.
Anyway, does it bother anyone they keep calling this show a "social experiment" instead of the more truthful "a chance to laugh at dorky guys lusting over bimboboobies"? (Heh. Bimbo Boobies sounds like the slutty sister of Bilbo Baggins. Someone you just know that horny Samwise would be all over.) I thought I had a funny "social experiment" comment to make here, but looking back over my notes it seems I wrote "Tunc, har!" Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
The Geeks pull up to the mansion in teeny golf carts. Too bad the producers didn't spring for Shriner cars. That would've ruled. Especially if they all had to wear a Fez. (The hat, not the statutory rapist. Although that would've ruled too.)
Here, in quick succession, are this season's Geeks: Josh, a 5'4", 104 pound museum critic and Woody Allen impersonator. He also takes medication to prevent anxiety attacks; Ankur, a member of the Indian Dance Club and inventor of the duct-tape bow tie; Chris, entrepreneur and Wolverine fanboy. ("He proved that hairy guys can get chicks.") Yeah, except this hairy guy; Tyson, a Rubik's Cube world record holder; Karl, a 12th Level Napoleon Dynamite Paladin; Wes, who tracks monkeys with lasers by using sharks with lasers attached to their heads; Joe, a speed-chess champion and aspiring rock drummer; and finally, Brandon, who may be a ringer.
Upon greeting the guys, host Mike Richards invites them into the house, where they gather in the library. "You are all here because you have one thing in common," he tells the gathered Geeks. "You all have humungous schlongs." Not really, but you know the Geeks were all thinking that. "You're all incredibly intelligent," Mike finishes. He then tells them they'll each be partnered with a Beauty, the hope being that the two groups will learn from each other (hence the "social experiment" angle). The Beauties will teach the Geeks Revenge of the Nerds was a fairy tale, while the Geeks will try to teach the Beauties the benefits of the mercy f*ck. Barring that, they'll settle for the third law of thermodynamics. The team that makes the biggest transformation at season's end will receive $250,000. (Anyone have any idea how this "transformation" is judged?")
Next, we get to meet the Beauties: Cher, a former Hooter's waitress and current beer spokesmodel; Sarah, a dental assistant not above using her huge tracts of land to get what she wants; Thais (aka Ty), a model who's never dated more than five, no six, guys at once; Tristin, a wicked-cool cocktail waitress and wicked-cool shot girl; Brittany, a tanning salon administrator who should've been born blonde; Jennipher, a camp counselor with an aversion to math and a thing for duct-tape; Amanda, who says, "When I see a large book, it's very intimidating to me. When I see a large menu, it's very intimidating to me."; and finally Danielle, who owns over 200 shoes and handbags.
Yes, they're real. And they're spectacular.
One at a time, the Geeks must go out back and introduce themselves to the Beauties, who are gathered, bikini-clad, near the pool. Then, the Beauties will decide which Geek they want to team up with. Still with me? Then let's get to pairing.
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Comments (11)
Am I the only one that thinks Karl Dynamite looks like Waldo? Now that we've found Waldo, we should probably look for his cane, dog and the wizard.
1 of 11 | Posted by southernbelle
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Posted on January 16, 2006 12:54 AM
I wasn't planning on watching the show but after catching it for a few moments was hooked.(why do I have the feeling that maks me a geek?)During the trivia challenge it took me a moment to remember it was John Kerry,I flashed on catsup (Heinz)then his wifes first name and then on his.Crap,I'm not a geek,I'm just an idiot.
2 of 11 | Posted by Brian
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Posted on January 16, 2006 4:33 AM
Copygodd,
The way they determine a winner is that each week two teams are selected (by a winning team) to go into the quiz room the women must answer history, science, math type questions than the men have to answer pop culture questions. The team that scores lower goes home. At the end of the season there are two final teams who battle it out. Yes it is sad that I know this.
Last season opened with the men in one room and the women in another and alternated having a man go to the women to introduce himself then wait in the hall to see who chose him. Then one woman would go introduce herself to the men and hope someone would choose her. I liked that way better it was nice to see the women sweat over being chosen. This season the girls had too much power - and could that Sarah have been any more bitchy about the selection process?
I also liked last season's host better - whoever this new guy is - he is very close to being one of the geeks himself.
I'm surprised you didn't mention Chris' shirt. I'm guessing he made it himself. "I put the Stud in Study" hehehe
Does anyone else think Danielle is very close to not being cute at all? With the bags under her very bulging eyes and the nervous twitchy smile. I mean she photographs well but onscreen she's kinda icky. And Cher - went on and on about her hot body but it didn't seem that great to me.
3 of 11 | Posted by TinkerbellAPixie
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Posted on January 16, 2006 4:54 AM
How long were you saving that Simon Cowell boobie joke?
That was friggin hilarious, made me laugh out loud. I think i like you.
4 of 11 | Posted by noodle
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Posted on January 16, 2006 10:35 AM
I loved it when the girl screwed up rock/paper/scissors. I mean, even the super simpering brunette figured it out! That was just the best.
That Chris guy is a real dick. Ankur, too. Someone needs to tell him that his "interesting" Flyers logo beard is ridiculous and so very unattractive. And dare I say it? Makes him look DUMB.
5 of 11 | Posted by Jess
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Posted on January 16, 2006 12:24 PM
Brandon is definitely a ringer. He's always the first person to speak up and volunteer.
6 of 11 | Posted by mcbwallace
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Posted on January 17, 2006 11:53 AM
it's just a quiz contest? what a ripoff.
i totally forgot to mention chris' shirt. looks like i put the dumb in dumbass.
7 of 11 | Posted by copygodd
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Posted on January 17, 2006 12:04 PM
the mercy f*ck line was great- Thank you! :)
why can't you say fuck though?
8 of 11 | Posted by zoobabe
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Posted on January 17, 2006 4:24 PM
we can say fuck. i was just trying to be polite.
looks like i put the fuck in fuckhead.
9 of 11 | Posted by copygodd
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Posted on January 17, 2006 8:25 PM
you're fuckin' hilarious!
10 of 11 | Posted by zoobabe
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Posted on January 18, 2006 7:56 AM
Check out www.BurnTees.com for I Put the Stud in Study t shirts.
11 of 11 | Posted by BurnTees.com
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Posted on February 4, 2006 4:12 PM