Previously on Beauty and the Geek the girls try to decide who they should sacrifice.
...a virgin? Good luck.
Everyone awaits the return of the prodigal whores. One by one the ladies enter and when Tom doesn't see his Cocoa Goddess stride through that door he is heartbroken, but confident that he will be dating Amber after the show is over. Leticia is thrilled that Amber didn't come back since Amber previously threatened her and Leticia fears she would get slashed with a box cutter or have a cap popped in her ass.
"But what will happen to our two-person Hair revival?"
Our intrepid host calls everyone to the living room to tell them that it is time for one player from each team to go to the opposite team simply because the producers had no better ideas this week. Every guy clamors to be the one red rovered over while every lady begs that she doesn't have to go. Jillian loses the coin toss, by calling "yellow" so she is relegated to the world of the geek, AKA World of Warcraft. Chris had the deepest belly button so he is allowed to join the ladies for their pillow fights and nightly panty swaps.
"Join the ladies? Do you mean we're going to make one giant, super-lady?"
Each team is informed that the twist this week will be immediate elimination of the geek or beauty who went to the opposing team to punish them for being a trader to their lot in life. To even the playing field, the competition this week will involve sports which have never been the home field of either the genus Geekus Dorkoramus or the Beautius Anorexia. Joe confesses that he would hate for Chris to leave the house since he's the only one that knows Kirk's true middle name, but every war has casualties and Chris is an acceptable loss just like cell-phone privacy and the rite to a fair vote.
Some of the players can ping-pong back and forth between teams easier than the others.
Neither team is told what sport they will be playing so everyone adjourns to the back yard to practice every possible sport, a game the geeks name footsocceboxbasetennis. Tara has a difficult time with the training since her two biggest fears in life are getting dirty and not being allowed to wear heals.
"This is actually easy. I just pretend it's a Bloomingdale's sales clerk."
The next day both teams are brought to the Beauty and the Geek Verizon Costco Stupid Flanders Caffegymatorium and informed that the true sport they will flag football. Randi is immediately terrified of breaking a bone but it shouldn't be a real problem for a girl with such obviously "big bones." Joe is thrilled since he watched the Aggie number in The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas 23 times. Chris assumes the role as team captain since he's the boy and puts his wildcats into a frenzied rage of raw adrenaline and foundation, each one hellbent on winning.
.........Nothing. Somebody already told her twice.
When the game begins Randi catches the first punt and runs a full zone halfback Nelson inning race to the......the......yea I'm gay I have no idea what I'm watching. I can tell you that the alleged "flag football" game gets violent pretty quickly with Tom tackling Chris and someone elbowing Randi in the lip. To be fair, it was a craft service worker who busted Randi in her grill and honestly the bitch had it comin'.
"Ewww. That girl's grill was already busted."
Greg is thrilled when he catches the football ball as this is the first time he, or any other gaysian, has been an asset to a sports team other than relieving the closeted player's frustrations post-game. Joe is frustrated with his team since he is using technical-speak with his team when none of them understand a word he is saying. Joe's competitive spirit comes out when he tackles Randi during a play causing Randi to scream "hail nah" and warn him that she will kill him if he ever touches her again which I'm sure she has never had to tell a man in the past.
Seriously, this is the best she could ever hope for.
« Paradise Hotel: The Government Collapses | Main | Keeping Up With the Kardashians: Someone Almost Becomes a Lady (of course not Kim) »
Comments (1)
Short and sweet, just like Randi (okay, sort of like Randi).
Either team could have won. The difference was in leadership. Joe should have been blocking and Tom should have been given the ball virtually every play.
Chris proved a natural leader; Joe should stick with online gaming.
As a group, the geeks are more likable, but I already feel bad when anyone has to leave.
They all seem to be bonding in a positive way, but I suspect most of the girls are just faking; the geeks really do care about the others.
1 of 1 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on April 2, 2008 12:02 PM