Anyway, the girls soon attacked their mission, with some faring better than others. Lauren, unfortunately, was completely perplexed at the notion of using "tape" to "attach" "fins" (I was air quoting). Also having difficulty was Mindi, whose only help from Richard was a random bit of trivia: "Bottle rocketry is called 'miniature astronautics.'" THANKS. I'm sure that really helped her. Meanwhile, after all her disparaging of rocket science, Krystal seemed to be really rocking the challenge -- but so was Caitilin, who's proven to be a tough competitor when it comes to these things (in an interview, she explained that she's never felt smart in her life and was determined to change that. Pass the tissues please...). Ultimately, Krystal actually launched her rocket first, but, uh, let's just say it was less Apollo 11 and more Challenger. The homemade spacecraft only got about a foot off the podium before it spastically careened into the ground -- perilously close to Brian McFeyden's feet, I'm sure. More successful was Caitlin, whose rocket soared to great, sexually-suggestive heights. For the second week in a row, she won the challenge and was so excited, she nearly forgot that old standby of physics: what goes up, must come down. "WATCH OUT!" yelled Chuck, as he pulled his partner away from her kamikaze bottle rocket. Never fear, no Caitilins were hurt during this production.
Meanwhile, I really want to make a bottle rocket now.
Now it was time for the guys' challenge, and boy, this was going to be a doozy. Brian McFeyden announced that the geeks would be buying clothing for their beauties: a bathing suit, a casual outfit, and a piece of evening wear. Sensational! A look of dread fell upon the guys' faces, and as Shawn expressed anxiety over the task, his mouth seemed to get toothier than it had ever been. It was like watching a picket fence made of enamel. By the way Shawn, if you're reading, might I suggest Mentadent Advance Whitening formula? It really works wonders. Just lookin' out, bud.
Anyway, the first stop for the guys was a small swim wear boutique in Beverly Hills where Richard got his jollies by calling thongs, "Butt floss." Yes, yes -- we've all heard that term before, but Richard could not stop saying it. Okay Richard, we get it. It's small and fits in the ass cheeks -- like floss. Some of us got over our thong giggles when we were 12. Or at least after the 300th time we heard "The Thong Song." ENOUGH.
The good news for Mindi was that Richard shunned the thongs, but the bad news was that he opted for a cheesy, animal print bikini. Chuck, meanwhile, was so lost he had to ask the saleswomen what their sizes were. Yes, women LOVE when strangers ask that! After what was probably a few hours of chaos, the guys all returned home where they asked their lovelies what their actual sizes were. Some got it correct -- Chuck's fist pump of glory had me wondering if he had just won the Women's Wear Superbowl -- but others were completely off the charts. Richard, for instance, learned the hard way the women's sizes don't always have much logic. "You're a zero??" he asked upon hearing Mindi's size. "A zero means you don't exist!" To be fair, that was pretty much my reaction several years ago when I first learned of size zero. Of course, back then, I assumed "1" was the lowest. Richard, however, assumed "2" was the base size (don't know why) and therefore figured that Mindi was two levels up. That's right. Richard's outfits were all 4, a.k.a. four sizes too big for her. This was going to be amazing.
The show then had me feeling all warm and tingly inside as the women asked Shawn how he felt about his purchases. He bashfully flashed his gigantic teeth and said he was feeling kind of embarrassed, at which point the women all encouraged him to be confident in his decisions. Awww... I love it when the groups help each other and HOLY SHIT! MY APARTMENT IS SHAKING! Yes, it seems like the terrestrial plates under Los Angeles enjoyed this scene too as they stirred to life, courtesy of some midday plate tectonics. Ah, that was fun. Must... email... everyone... "Did you feel that?"
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Comments (29)
I was so hoping Richard and Mindi (sorry Mindi!) would be the next to leave. Richard bugs me to no end--he's like that super annoying kid from Hebrew school. Ugh.
1 of 29 | Posted by Hilary | Posted on June 16, 2005 10:24 PM
Oh I love this show, I have been telling EVERYONE I know to watch it.
Ok this is kinda cheesy but I actually feel good after watching this show, it's nice to see people learning and growing in a way that can help all of us be more tolerant.
I'm bummed about the eliminations cuz I like all the teams, I feel sorry for Richard, but it's really nothing a little adderall cant help.
2 of 29 | Posted by stoopy | Posted on June 16, 2005 10:50 PM
Fab-u-lous! I don't know what was funnier--the whole cold sore-Katie Holmes connection or the fact that mid sentence an earthquake happening, and B-Side doesn't backdown! A stellar example of, "The show must go on!" Can't wait to hear the latest instal of, "The Cut."
3 of 29 | Posted by Helenann | Posted on June 16, 2005 11:54 PM
Does anyone know whether Michael Jackson likes black or white cock?
4 of 29 | Posted by julian roberts | Posted on June 17, 2005 12:44 AM
Umm.. damn... okay... I'll do it: Gettin' my Geek on!
You're not using the term "Bottle Rocket" correctly. Bottle Rocket is idiomatic English for a type of firework - not a model rocket.
Bottle Rockets are small fireworks that look like a firecracker on the end of a red or green painted stick. The stick is approximately 10-12 inches long and the "rocket" (technically it's an engine, not a rocket) is approximately 2-3 inches in length. The rocket contains a propellant and an explosive. The propellant drives the firework (with attached stick) into the air and the explosive goes off, sending out a loud report and a shower of sparks, once the firework has (presumably) reached a certain altitude.
They're called "bottle rockets" because, despite the written warning on the fireworks that tells the user to "plant in ground" when setting them off, most users prefer to use a beer or soda bottle as the launching device. That's my preferred method -- sometimes when you place them in the ground you push them too far into the dirt and they don't fly, the stick gets stuck and they just burst on the ground. A bottle allows them to fly out unimpeded, while pointing vertically.
Model rockets, on the other hand, are completely different creatures. They're more or less meant to model actual rockets -- with fins and other rocket details. They're also reusable. They should have a recovery system, usually a parachute or other fall-limiting device that is deployed at the apogee of the rocket's flight that returns the rocket safely to earth.
One is for learnin', one is for fun.
Deciding which one is which is what separates the geeks from the boys.
Live long and prosper!
~Elvis
5 of 29 | Posted by Elvis | Posted on June 17, 2005 7:17 AM
I used to wear 2 and 4. A 4 would be two sizes up from a 0, not four sizes.
6 of 29 | Posted by Lady J | Posted on June 17, 2005 7:18 AM
Elvis, I definetly think you need to try out for this show after that last post.
Richard, I thought you were quirky, but yes, now you're just getting kinda annoying. And if a bunch of people tell you to shut up and knock off the dunce routine, take the hint and stop.
Caitilin, your ass looked great!!!! Don't worry about it. I only wish my ass looked like that.
Size ZERO!??!?!?!?! I still can't get over that this is an actual size. I would be happy to be a 4. Seriously, I was once & I thought I was fat. Now I would kill to go back to that.
7 of 29 | Posted by Genevieve | Posted on June 17, 2005 7:57 AM
That picture of Richard spooning in his tennis shoes reminds me so much of "Weird Science" when the mutants said to Anthony Michael Hall and the other guy -- "You two can't even shower with a beautiful woman without wearing your jeans". The whole show seems to have an element of Weird Science, Breakfast Club, 16 Candles and the rest of Anthony Michael Hall's career...
8 of 29 | Posted by BigMax | Posted on June 17, 2005 8:04 AM
Yes, to further expound on Lady J's sizing explantion - clothes for girls/women come in two sets: junior sizes, which have less hip to them, are odd: 1, 3, 5. Misses sizes, which are made for a more curvy shape, are even: 2, 4, 6. Often clothes are sold as a mix of both: 1/2, 3/4, 5/6. I don't know what junior size goes along with 0; maybe -1? -1/0? So anyway, a 4 is indeed only two sizes up from a 0.
And that's about as much as I know about fashion!
9 of 29 | Posted by Lola | Posted on June 17, 2005 8:36 AM
Lola,
Don't forget there is a size 00 (double zero).
10 of 29 | Posted by J-Unit | Posted on June 17, 2005 9:14 AM
Who is the Miz?
11 of 29 | Posted by Julie | Posted on June 17, 2005 9:33 AM
Anyone notice that Brad's questions in te ELIMINATION ROOM were incredibly hard? "What upscale department store has the same name as that of a children's entertainment character?"
Are they joking? The "beauty" and a gay man in my living room couldn't answer that. Of course the answer is Barney's, but we listened to the question 3 times on the TiVo and still had no idea.
I think they had two questions on each card -- an easy one and a hard one -- so that the producers could keep Richard on.
I hate that guy. I think was in the same Hebrew class as Hillary.
12 of 29 | Posted by ToniFerrari | Posted on June 17, 2005 9:46 AM
The bikini bottom was sized too small, but Caitlin has a great body. I can't understand her self-consciousness. Us women can be so rediculous.
And I felt the earthquake yesterday too B-Side. My hi-rise office building swayed back and forth, it was crazy. 4 big quakes in 5 days—so bizarre. I haven't felt that many in 8 years living in California. Does that mean the big one's coming? Scary!!!
13 of 29 | Posted by Amanda | Posted on June 17, 2005 10:22 AM
I just was really glad for Mindi that she was spooning him, not him spooning her. Yeah- he might be a nice guy, but thought of him rubbing up on anyone is enough to make my skin crawl. It was one of those TV moments when you feel your own face get red with embarassment for them.
14 of 29 | Posted by Kelley | Posted on June 17, 2005 10:50 AM
The Miz & Lauren? Where's that post, B-side?!
15 of 29 | Posted by ikellybside | Posted on June 17, 2005 10:58 AM
The WB doesn't show the episode whenever I flip it on, unless it is the rerun :( I chose to tape the rerun and watch another show but it didn't tape the right thing. Iwish I had seen it because it sounded like a great episode. btw: who is that in the picture on the right at the top of the recap.
Elvis: read your post. All I'm thinking is: And you know this how?
Julie: I have no idea either. Please tell us.
16 of 29 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on June 17, 2005 12:52 PM
I want to make a rocket like they made! Does anyone know where I can find out how to do one similar to the ones on the show?
I was gypped with the quake, was driving in my car and missed the whole thing. I did feel the one Saturday morning, though!
17 of 29 | Posted by nunya | Posted on June 17, 2005 12:55 PM
myself: "who is that in the picture on the right at the top of the screen" It was Caitlin right?
18 of 29 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on June 17, 2005 12:55 PM
julie & tv freak -- The Miz is Mike from The Real World Back to NY. He's also on all the Real World / Road Rules Challenges.
19 of 29 | Posted by ikellybside | Posted on June 17, 2005 1:06 PM
I love this show...
On that note, I'm glad Brad is gone, he was way too good looking to be on the show. And I thought they did blood tests on people that go on these shows...maybe they assumed no one would be making out...but seriously, you put a bunch of sluts and guys together, something is bound to happen...
PS Just felt like sharing...the guy doing the makeovers next week is my boyfriend's hairstylist Arnil...I feel so special when I know people on TV
20 of 29 | Posted by smithie | Posted on June 17, 2005 1:50 PM
I still can't help but think Richard is an actor paid to be as whacky as he is. I mean sure he is a genuine geek - but I think he is paid to play it up.
21 of 29 | Posted by TinkerbellAPixie | Posted on June 18, 2005 8:45 PM
Elvis - you're right about the bottle rockets....but you should know in Memphis we have "bottle rocket wars" where you hold on to the stick part and throw it after it's been lit. ah, good fun, good times....
22 of 29 | Posted by 4 fingers | Posted on June 18, 2005 9:08 PM
I still think Richard has sensory issues. ADD MAYBE?
23 of 29 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on June 19, 2005 7:50 PM
I actually go to school with Richard (well did, he just graduated) and he *really is* that geeky. I was in a class with him and he pulled insane stunts like he does on TV. He had a TV show on the school TV channel where he'd sort of play up his geeky-ness. I think he wants to be a comedian, so if it seems a little over-done, that's probably why. But, he is truly akward and his pants are always funny looking -- pooking out at his hips. I wonder if he pins them that way?
24 of 29 | Posted by Lauren | Posted on June 21, 2005 4:00 PM
Anyone else think that Lauren sounds just like Tara Reid? Probably just as much of a party girl as well.
25 of 29 | Posted by The Dogg Pound | Posted on June 23, 2005 3:12 PM
If Richard leaves the show, I will stop watching, he is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
26 of 29 | Posted by Delta1 | Posted on June 24, 2005 4:02 PM
Lauren is deffinetly my favorite.. shes soo cute
27 of 29 | Posted by Brittany | Posted on July 3, 2005 4:47 PM
This show is rigged. The Richard guy is an actor. Check this link out:
http://www.realityfanforum.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=323
Obviously they make the annoying guy stay to the end...it makes you want to watch the show.
28 of 29 | Posted by Foolio | Posted on July 3, 2005 9:22 PM
i think mindi is amazing. and richard is awesome... some of you guys are really insincere. shame.
29 of 29 | Posted by tracy | Posted on July 6, 2005 1:36 AM