He Puts The "Good" In "Goodbye"

moronchris2206.jpg
When it comes to recapping Beauty and the Geek, it seems the more things change, the more they stay the same. For once, I experienced no technical difficulties with the signal, and yet my recap is still late. I'd planned on having it up by Sunday evening, but I forgot that big football game with all the commercials was on. (I can't say the name of the game, or the NFL will sue me. Although I can tell you it rhymes with "pooper.")

This week's episode kicks off with Chris and Tristin returning upstairs after winning yet another Elimination Ceremony. (Sure, it's only been two wins in a row, but I get the feeling these two are going to be nominated every week until someone takes them down.) Tristin is worried that nobody's going to be happy to see them. And while it's nice that Danielle gives her a big hug, it's not nearly big enough to overcome Cher's Eye Daggers of Death. If she could, I'm sure Cher would give Tristin and Chris both a big festering case of butt cancer.

Later, Ankur is hanging out upstairs with Cher. He thinks she's just there for the money. And he's right, as she tells us: "I don't think any of the guys are here for the money. They're just here for the experience. But that money can change my life. I won't have to work three jobs anymore." Of course, she'll still be walking around with no underwear, but that's always been her second job.

Cher asks Ankur why he's at the house. "I came here to change Ankur," he tells her. One, two, three: Aaaahhhh…. Poor Ankur has never hung around non-nerds, has never been on a date, and has never met a roll of duct tape he couldn't fashion into a nerdish accessory guaranteed to scare off the girls. Seriously dude, what's there to change?

While Cher and Ankur are talking, Tristin tells Josh and a few others that she got all three of her computer questions right. Josh asks her if he can phone her sometime for tech support. Lamest. Pickup. Line. Ever. (And by ever, of course, I mean so far this episode.)
hottubbin2206.jpg
It's hot tub time! Or, as Josh calls it, "Josh Challenge Time". "Every day there's an official challenge, and the Josh Challenge," he explains. The Josh Challenges are supposed to help him conquer his fears, one of which is the hot tub. While he doesn't take his robe off tonight, he does stick his toes in the water. One fear at a time, Josh. One fear at a time.

Host Mike Richards calls the players down to the library to go over this week's challenge. "Guys, I think we can agree dating is not your strong point," he starts off. Wow, way to go out on a limb, Captain Obvious. Next you'll be telling us the sky is blue and my recaps suck. This week's study materials will teach the Geeks how to behave on a date. Ever the romantic, Chris shares his feelings on dating: "I think you're better off if you just sock yourself in the crotch and throw away $50." Hey, that's the same way I spent my Senior Prom. Ah, memories.

To help the Geeks out on the dating challenge, the Beauties get to give their partners a makeover. I hope they do it slumber party style, so when one of the Geeks falls asleep, someone will dunk their hand in warm water or spread peanut butter in their armpit. Alas, it's not to be, as instead of a sleepover the gang heads out to the mall. First they stop at Planet Funk for some new clothes. Danielle is totally psyched: "As soon as I walk into a mall, I'm instantly happy, because it's one of the best sporting events ever to go into a store and go crazy." Danielle probably thinks mall-walking should be an Olympic event. If only she could spell Olympic. Or event.

Ankur is worried that the clothes Jennipher is picking out will get dirty too easily. And poor Josh can't find any clothes that fit. Men's clothes, that is. So Cher has him try on girl's jeans. Josh is the least booku contestant ever. "If the clothes make the man, and I'm wearing women's clothes, does that make me a woman?" he asks. No, Josh, your vagina makes you a woman. Well, providing you've have your first period. Otherwise, you're still just a girl.

He Puts The "Good" In "Goodbye" Sections:  1  |  2  |  3 

« Thank God for Beer Commercials | Main | The Longest Yard Sale »

Comments (26)

Ash Author Profile Page:

Even if you don't like doing the recaps for this show, they are great. I honestly love this show, and enjoyed seeing the boys after their makeovers! And who knows why, but I really like Cher, even though everyone else hates her!

thanks. i like this show a lot, and i don't mind doing the recaps, i just feel bad cuz something always seems to go wrong with them.

that said, i'm kinda sad chris is gone, as he gave me some of my best material.

juxtapoeser Author Profile Page:

i heard a rumor the wes and cher are no dating....can anyone confirm?

doorsmats Author Profile Page:

I think the question was about topics not to discuss on a first date....maybe sex? Chris looked the best, but he clearly looked the best from the beginning, too, so I'm not sure he had the best "net gain".

doorsmats Author Profile Page:

Whoops...meant to say Wes, not Chris.

stacyrocks Author Profile Page:

It sucks that Chris & Tristin were eliminated. Last week it was dear Tyson and now Chris. I didn't like Chris but he added to the show and always said something that was so out there I couldn't help but laugh at him. Oh and you didn't mention when Chris asked if he could compliment her cleavage and Tristin, who was showing some boobage, was like 'uhhhhh, NOOO!'. Anyways, good recap, copygodd... and yeah the show was a little boring this week. I still enjoyed though. :)

stacyrocks Author Profile Page:

-juxtapoeser;

The previews for next week showed Wes and Cher getting close and sleeping/making out together so maybe it worked out off the show for the 2 of them. :)

juxtapoeser Author Profile Page:

staceyrocks ---

thanks for the update. my vcr cut off the previews (i know....i know..must get tivo)

maybe this show finally accomplishes what Average Joe couldn't!!

d'oh! how could i forget the cleavage comment? i'm a silly, silly man.

Silver559 Author Profile Page:

So Chris' major is Psychology? Then where does he get off telling Josh and Tristin they're dumb because they're Psych majors??

TinkerbellAPixie Author Profile Page:

#8 - I have a DVR and it tends to cut off at the end too - darn it - so I missed the shot of Cher cuddling Wes. Frankly I'd cuddle him, and this might make me a nerd but I think tracking monkeys with lasers sounds kinda cool.

Copygodd, great recap - as always!

"Josh certainly thinks so, as he tells us he looks so good he'd hook up with himself. Like that hasn't already happened at least three times today alone. " Um... I dated a guy once, I think many would call him a geek, I was his first gf and it turned out he didn't hook up with himself at all....EVER. SO maybe Josh doesn't either.

I finally figured out who the host looks like - he's what you would get if you mated Mr. Belding from Saved by the Bell with Joxser from Xena: Warrior Princess.

Yes, very boring. Most of the makeovers weren't even exciting. Did anyone else think Josh lost his mojo when they cut all his hair off?

*yawn* Wake me when Cher and Wes hook up.

wniffene Author Profile Page:

I discovered this show by flipping around during the none too spectacular halftime show during the Super Bowl, I only saw the introductions but the simple fact that one of the girls was confused when rock didn't crush paper, meant I had to check the recaps here. I think they are hilarious. I'm not sure if I could ever make time to watch an actual expisode (since I don't even know when it's on) but I'll have to read the recaps for at least this season.

ldini79 Author Profile Page:

come on, copygodd, didn't you watch the show? clearly the fourth thing you can't talk about on a date is tracking monkeys with lasers. although i disagree, nothing is better than monkeys, especially when the monkey is making out with a cat:

http://ant.sillydog.org/blog/2005/000830.php

HicksPub Author Profile Page:

Although I'm delighted that Chris is gone (at least he has his enormous ego to keep him warm), Tristin got an overall raw deal on the show, thanks to Chris. First, she got ripped from probably one of the best guys in the house (thanks, Chris). Then, she got paired with the Almighty Dickhead Himself (thanks, Chris). She was trapped into fighting to save him in order to save herself. Hopefully, Cher will be the next in the houseguests' cross-hairs.

TinkerbellAPixie Author Profile Page:

I hate to defend Chris - but I think in his own awkward way he never really meant to be a jerk - just didn't possess any social graces whatsoever.

zoobabe Author Profile Page:

I'd talk about monkeys with Wes, but I KNOW monkeys. Monkeys rule!


He was a definite hottie after his makeover though, and he had some game too.

southernbelle Author Profile Page:

The fourth thing is money. You should never discuss anything financially related during a date.

money makes sense, but unless you're dating jane goodall, i'm gonna stick with monkeys as topic non grata.

zoobabe Author Profile Page:

check out my Typekey profile copygodd. I'm Goodall-ish. Any guy that dates me is gonna discuss monkeys (some of the time). :)

maryjane Author Profile Page:

i went to high school with wes. they are loosely using the term "geek." he dated a cheerleader w/a smokin' bod and an insatiable appetite for sex. he's no richard "the virgin kisser" from last season.

TinkerbellAPixie Author Profile Page:

I think I spotted Wes on the scenes for an upcoming episode of Elimidate. Anyone else see that?

Oh btw, copygodd - I just love all your t-shirt ideas. You put the hum in humorous.

zoobabe Author Profile Page:

ah- thanks for the scoop maryjane. They brought in a ringer!

dang, zoobabe! what are you working on there, a giant gerbil?

if so, richard gere will probably be calling you soon.

zoobabe Author Profile Page:

LOL!

It's a gorilla. I'm not the vet, just the keeper.

Jennifer30309 Author Profile Page:

You forgot the best part! When Chris was asked the question about the Italian lover, Tristin was whispering, "He's not going to know this. It's Don Juan de Marco." Of course, the answer was Casanova. And I'm pretty sure it would be Don Juan, and that the "de Marco" was just added for the Johnny Depp movie. What an idiot.

65