Regardless of how dull the last few weeks have been, however, overall the show was still a success. Be they Beauty or Geek, everyone who stayed in the house for this "social experiment" has said they learned something about themselves. And even though I fall in neither category--too male to be a Beauty, too socially adjusted to be a Geek--and only recapped this show, I too have learned a deeper truth about myself, and my relationship to my fellow man: I'm good at making fun of people. And, more important, I'm proud of the fact that I'm good at it. My mom was right: I am an asshole.
This week's show starts off with a quick recap of the season's highs and lows. After blowing through this, we catch Joe and Brittany heading up the stairs to meet Josh and Cher. Securing their place in the finals by eliminating Jennipher and Ankur has made Brittany "tingly all over". Who knew that pummeling her friends would be such an aphrodisiac? Joe says he knows Josh and Cher did not want them to win, because they feel he and Brittany are the strongest competitors. And he's right. Josh is so nervous about who won he's physically shaking. The last thing he wants is a level playing field. The next-to-last thing he wants is another swirlie from Cher.
When Joe and Brittany walk through the door, there's a lot of backslapping, then a really awkward silence after Joe mentions he needs to change because his brown shoes don't match his black shirt. I'm not sure if the awkwardness stems from his fashion faux pas, or the fact that he and Josh have finally assumed the roles they were born to play: DeNiro verus Pacino in Heat. (I'll let you decide who's who.)
"I am a golden god!"
Later, the teams gather down at the hot tub. And finally, Josh is ready to get in. Josh tells us that unlike the song, his body is most definitely not a wonderland. In fact, he considers it to be much more like a carnival freak show. And I'm inclined to agree, as without a shirt, poor Josh looks like a dirty Q-Tip. Still, he disrobes and jumps in. On the one hand, it's good to see Josh conquer his fears of showing his body to other people. On the other hand, we were the people he showed it to.
Since there are only two teams left, there's no need for a competition this week. Instead, Host Mike Richards tells the remaining contestants their study materials are sitting right next to them. In other words, they need to study their partners. Fortunately for them, Josh and Joe have been studying their partners since Day One. Joe feels it's not luck that the two best teams have made it to the finals. "If there's ever a time the giants need to meet, it's in the finals," he says. Instead of showing their weaknesses, this week everyone gets to show their partners something they're actually good at. Why do I get the feeling this is Joe's special talent?
Josh takes Cher fly fishing, which is something I never expected him to do. Of course, I never expected him to know how big of a penis Wes has either, so what do I know. When he's fly fishing, Josh says he gets totally lost in the moment, and his mind goes blank. Just like Cher! Speaking of which, despite the sport's lack of fashion, our favorite beer spokesmodel is trying to make her outfit cuter, which amuses Josh. As he says, the fish don't go after something that's cute. They go after something that looks like a fly. If only Josh were fishing with Jeff Goldblum. Cher loses a few lures, tangles her line, doesn’t catch anything and smacks Josh in the face a couple of times, so overall it was a good day. The best thing about this segment, however, is the Hee Haw music the producers pick to play under the segment. I kept expecting Grandpa Jones to pop up and tell us what's for supper.
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Comments (10)
All I can say is that watching this for the whole season was worthwhile if only because Joe wants to take away Brittany's innocence...and Josh has Wes' penis envy...The last challenge was awesome.
1 of 10 | Posted by BigMax
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Posted on March 13, 2006 2:49 PM
The finale was boring but highlighted with Josh knowing Wes' penis size.
And, copygodd... this recap was hilarious. 'I just came' caption, priceless!
Also, the "I hope Host Mike Richards asks Cher the strangest place she's ever made whoopee. "That would be up the butt, Mike." " - That made me think of Jenna (as in Jameson)'s American Sex Star show where they ask this wannabe porn star that question and she goes seriously "In my butt".
Thanks for this season, it's been "fun"... (cough cough). Your recaps made it all better though :)
2 of 10 | Posted by stacyrocks
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Posted on March 13, 2006 2:50 PM
good recap... i thought the season was pretty good. also on reality chat on the tvguide channel on tv wes and cher were on there talking about how they fell in love within a week of being on the show. how long do yall give that reality tv match made in heaven?
3 of 10 | Posted by aggie10
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Posted on March 13, 2006 3:42 PM
Did anyone else see Ankur on "Scientific American Frontiers" (you know, the one with Alan Alda?) I swear I saw him during a segment about MIT kids building robots--meaning at least HE is not an actor.
Also, as much as I liked Josh, I really want to see Cher lose. :(
4 of 10 | Posted by Dr. Grissom
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Posted on March 13, 2006 4:21 PM
The comments were worth reading if only to read how stacyrocks knows porn but doesn't realize the origin of up the butt. Ha ha.
http://www.snopes.com/radiotv/tv/newlywed.htm
5 of 10 | Posted by The Svan
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Posted on March 13, 2006 5:03 PM
The_Svan;
LoL! Well, I am only 22 and I wasn't born American or speaking English so I've never watched The Newlywed game show. Thanks for the memo. :)
6 of 10 | Posted by stacyrocks
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Posted on March 13, 2006 9:19 PM
Great recap copygodd. I kinda wanted Joe and Brittany to win it all, but I did like Josh too. I bet that Wes and Cher's relationship will last a lot longer now that she has the money. Hopefully she'll use it for something better than bigger breasts.
7 of 10 | Posted by zoobabe
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Posted on March 14, 2006 4:56 AM
Nice recap!
I hoped Josh would win from day one. I just wish his partner wasn't such a b*tch.
I don't think Cher deserved to be on the show...she wasn't as dumb as the other girls. She actually had goals and she could read! I think it was unfair.
8 of 10 | Posted by MindyLou
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Posted on March 14, 2006 8:08 AM
Poor, sweet, innocent Brittany -- she mastered poker, chess, and yes, even reading a map, only to have the win and the money snatched away from her. TWO questions for Josh and Cher with "Wes" as the obvious answer? Random, my left foot.
9 of 10 | Posted by bluebell
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Posted on March 14, 2006 8:17 AM
The overtime rules should have had the Beauties define "Sequestered".
10 of 10 | Posted by swimbikerun
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Posted on March 14, 2006 10:52 AM