The fun times keep rollin' on Beauty and the Geek where this week, the guys faced that most daunting of challenges: getting women's phone numbers. Oh, but that's not all. They also had to ask their female roommates out on dates AND endure head-to-toe makeovers. Yes, it was all about the geeks this week (the beauties had some perfunctory arithmetic to deal with, but whatever), and furthermore, it was all about Richard. The once amusing Woody Allen wannabe has now officially become annoying, but not just to me or the rest of the audience. Chuck, who'd been growing increasingly impatient with Richard, graduated to full scale hostility. This ain't the Real World; so we weren't about to see any beat downs and broken skulls But as far as inter-geek social relations go, this rivalry was about as close as one can get to a nerd fist fight.
The episode began with Richard and Mindi returning to a bedroom where all the other contestants had been quarantined. I always like this little touch -- the couples crammed into a solitary room. It's very David Mamet. You just know we're missing out on some old-fashioned, well-articulated psychological power plays by Chuck and Shawn. But I digress, as usual. Anyway, Richard and Mindi returned amidst cheers of triumph, but at least one person was unhappy: Chuck. Yes, this poofy-haired, bloody-nosed med student has been Very Serious about the Journeys in the household, and Richard's constant "acting" has rightfully annoyed him. And just in case we thought Chuck might be blowing it all out of proportion, we then watched random footage of Richard yelling "Top of the morning t'ya!" to a statue and then sliding down a banister very, very slooooowwwly (turns out those extended thigh flaps increase friction and drag. Who knew?).
"I want to stay here, and I want to continue terrorizing Chuck!" Richard proclaimed to us. Whoa! Does this mean that Richard, the nerd, is actually a bully??? That can't be right. Oh wait, no, he's just that annoying kid brother type that needles and needles away at people until they snap -- kind of like how I was when I was eight... not TWENTY ONE! Or at least I hope...
Anyway, Brian McFayden, dressed uncannily like the Hamburglar, summoned the teams to his lair for a traditional, if not erroneous, pep talk. You see, McFayFay announced that the show was past its halfway mark and the remaining groups all had a one in four chance of winning the big prize. Luckily, fractional/probability stickler Chuck informed us that this wasn't totally the truth. "I resisted the temptation to point out that we were four sevenths, not half of the way through and that, um, having a one and four chance of winning the prize was contingent upon everybody's chances of winning being roughly equal." Well, duh! Thanks for clearing that up, Captain Obvious! Meanwhile, I'm quietly scratching out my planned dissertation, titled "Why Brian McFayden is wrong..."
Luckily, since Chuck resisted that insane temptation to correct our cardboard host (Chuck's version of Temptation Island: place him in an exotic resort full of people boasting erroneous fractions), Brian McFayden powered on. We learned that the challenge this week would be one big task split into two halves (Chuck just nodded approvingly). The women's half would deal with finance, or as Brian so coyly put it, "Make cents of dollars." Oh, get it! Because it's like he's saying "sense" but he said "cents" instead, because of the whole money thing. Wow, that was almost as good as last week when he was all "Fashion -- it's not rocket science. But ladies, you'll have to study rocket science." This man is HILARious!
Well, Lauren didn't seem to appreciate the punnage. Instead, she complained, "There's a lot of things I'd rather do than do math. I'd like to go work out, go jog, go to the beach, go shopping, go out, go to dinner. Anything but math." Anything, Lauren? How about get a colonoscopy? That's right, biatch. Don't be dissin' the math.
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Comments (9)
I've never seen that show before, but it's fun to watch Richard. He's such a trainwreck of social awkwardness.
He's the Urkel of this Family Matters. Had he not been cast, this show would have been canceled.
1 of 9 | Posted by British | Posted on June 28, 2005 6:06 AM
How the hell did Richard get SIX phone numbers? Did they have no age limit on the "women" they needed to get phone numbers from? Did he offer to "cat-sit" for 70+ year old ladies absent-mindedly wandering through the land of $10 hamburgers and sweaty tourists that is CityWalk?
Impressive use of the gay screenwriter angle by Chuck though -- though it kind of defeats the whole "transformation" purpose of the challenge? And how sad is it that Chuck will soon learn that "Scar" got her nickname by ripping the heart out of men she manipulated using her sex appeal to get what she wants.
2 of 9 | Posted by TrojanMan | Posted on June 28, 2005 7:41 AM
Did anyone see Richard on Regis and Kelly on Monday morning? He was freaking hilarious. I loved his pseudo-impersonation of Mr. Philbin and his spoon/fork double entendre. Also, he just left the stage as soon as his last segment wrapped up. Usually guests wait until the commercial break before they leave. What a strange character.
3 of 9 | Posted by YoYoMa | Posted on June 28, 2005 7:52 AM
Okay, Chuck. 7 competing teams means 6 eliminations to "crown" one winning team. 3 eliminations had occurred, meaning that the show was indeed just past the halfway point.
Other than that, I totally agree about the "chances being equal" thing. It always irks me when that is said.
4 of 9 | Posted by Dan | Posted on June 28, 2005 12:37 PM
In the picture of Brian McFayden, dressed uncannily like the Hamburglar...
does it look like something is protruding his right cheek?
5 of 9 | Posted by iLikeBill | Posted on June 28, 2005 1:17 PM
I was really disappointed with Chuck using the "gay scriptwriter" bit in order to get phone numbers. How is that going to help him get a girl in real life? He's always down on Richard for hiding behind his obnoxious Woody Allen schtick, but when it comes to a challenge Chuck's uncomfortable with, he hides behind the gay scriptwriter act. Come on Chuck, you're supposed to learn and grow through this experience!
6 of 9 | Posted by Holly | Posted on June 29, 2005 6:14 AM
great recap, b-side, you were dead on with the makeover commentary (your oooh! ahhhh! eh! oy! is still giving me the giggles). it's funny how much bill changed by just taking of his glasses and putting a little product in his hair.
i did notice that kite-illin and lauren had a special bonding moment a few episodes ago when they were making fun of everyone else in the house in a bitchy but humorous segment (where caitilin said she wanted to throw chucky out the window, eliminate all the geeks, and get the real party started).
7 of 9 | Posted by ldini79 | Posted on June 29, 2005 12:16 PM
hey yall i want chuck 2 win
8 of 9 | Posted by ally | Posted on July 7, 2005 12:58 PM
HAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh
i love your recap!!!!!1
its HILARIOUS!
u r so funny
9 of 9 | Posted by haha | Posted on July 11, 2005 7:19 PM