Tonight on Beauty and the Geek, as our stereotyped contenders moved into the house and got to know each other better, we learned why weed should be legal and how to fight stupid with stupid, in addition to seeing the nerdiest rappers since Snow burst onto the scene, oh so many years ago.
We find our bevy of beauties 'n' geeks in the exact same position as when we last saw them, and now they get to choose their rooms. It causes quite a commotion as each girl runs to different rooms and each guy chases after them, hoping against hope that they'll get to share a bed, possibly covered in "Star Wars" bed sheets. Oh come on. Don't pretend like you didn't have them back in the day.
"Hot" guy is most disappointed in his room, as he walks amongst the pink-covered walls and wonders aloud, "are these MY glasses?" Nerdy chick has to explain to him that no, he's the beauty, and politely hands him the tiara. He promptly puts it on backwards. Way to start a trend, Hunky! It's like when the Fresh Prince started wearing his hats to the side. That was dope!
"Yo, home, to Bel-Air!"
By the way, Mr. Beefcake? Something tells me he's a little... how shall we say it... limp-wristed? Maybe it was the lisp in his voice when he said, "Nicole jussst issssn't the type of perssson I usuallllly hang out with." Maybe it was his sleeveless muscle tee. Maybe it was the cock hanging out of his mouth when he thought the camera wasn't on him. I'm not sure, I just get this sense. Meanwhile, Nicole is flaunting the obvious, wearing hideous sweater vests and shirts proclaiming her love for nerds. Yeah, we get it! You're wearing glasses, therefore, you're dorky! I smell one "She's All That" moment coming up where Miss Bickerstaff here gets contacts and she's suddenly hot. I am prepared to be less than amazed.
Over at LARPer-central, Jasmine is hogging all of the free shwag by wearing both the crown AND the glasses. The LARPer, however, crushes all of her dreams by revealing that she was his last choice for a partner. Her face falls as she verrrrrry slowly comprehends what this means.
"These glasses don't make me smart?"
Elsewhere in the house, Tits McGee, whom you may remember for being proud of her very expensive assets, is making herself at home and giving the editors plenty to work with for time fillers.
"What boobs? Where?"
Down in Jacuzzi, Sam (oh yeah, that's the "beautiful" man) is waxing poetic about how great it feels to be muscular and have people look at you when you walk in a room. It probably helps that you're the only person wearing neon hot pants and a mesh tank top when you walk into that room. Over in the corner, David awkwardly hugs a towel against his pasty, chubby body and remarks, "I'm... not.... really.... in shape." Really? Couldn't tell that from your man-boobs. However, it does occur to me that having this wrench thrown into the equation of hot guy/geeky girl likely changes the dynamic among the group, because before, at least the geeky guys were surrounded by fellow dweebs. Now they know all the ladies are looking at this hunk of meat, who throws off the curve completely. "Guys like Sam have always gotten by on their looks," Katie says without a trace of irony. "And their big muscles...." She trails off and I'm pretty sure her dazed expression also says, "... and luscious lips... and giant dicks..."
It's the same with the ladies though, except it's just this one poor girl who gets to feel self-conscious about her body, face and fashion among the tarts. I somehow doubt all of the beauties feel insecure around Nicole and her giant, bouncy brains.
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Comments (6)
Good job! I laughed out loud a couple times.
Nice call about the Saved By The Bell set, hahaha.
1 of 6 | Posted by TVCHEESE | Posted on September 27, 2007 8:32 AM
from wikipedia:
"This season's male beauty, though listed in his site bio as being a party promoter, is actor Sam Horrigan of Disney's Brink! fame. He has also played small roles in Veronica Mars, Desperate Housewives, and 8 Simple Rules for Dating my Teenage Daughter."
I actually think a whole show of beauty males and geeky girls would be interesting.
2 of 6 | Posted by jmportia | Posted on September 27, 2007 9:07 PM
I don't think a season with hot guys and geeky girls could ever work, unfortunately. The reason it works with hot girls is that their compassionate, nurturing side kicks in so they want to help each other and actually care about the guys -- I don't see that happening on the flip side. maybe it's just me but I don't see it.
Also, dude needs to calm down with those eyebrows ASAP. They're frighteningly pointy. And Jasmine, while dumb, is not exactly a beauty in my opinion. Kinda busted, no?
3 of 6 | Posted by fycin | Posted on September 28, 2007 7:24 AM
The 2nd caption definitely disses the Fresh Prince. The lyric is "Yo homes, to Bel-Air!". Wack.
4 of 6 | Posted by MOwen | Posted on September 28, 2007 8:13 PM
An interesting tidbit...my english teacher's son is best friends with the geek John (Juggler extraordinaire). John was not allowed to reveal the results of the show, of corse, but said he was "very pleased" with the outcome. He was also apparently the president of a frat over at MIT where there was much drinking and partying. I think John and Natalie are going to be a team to watch out for.
5 of 6 | Posted by coolsolio | Posted on September 29, 2007 6:19 AM
Sam has The Crazy Eyes.
6 of 6 | Posted by srah | Posted on October 5, 2007 6:00 AM