First up the houseguests have to guess the length of the snake. Considering Ollie lied to April as to what 9 inches looks like she completely over estimates. Jerry comes closest and wins a point since the python is the same celebrity python that Britney Spears danced with at that awards show several years back. As it turns out Jerry is the president of Britney's fan club. Ya think you know a guy.
Sorry baby. I meant centimeters. My bad.
Next up the houseguests have to guess how many pins are stuck into the eight voodoo dolls, which represent each of the remaining houseguests. Renny admits that she doesn't like seeing her own doll with so many pins in it considering she knows a lot of people in Louisiana who practice voodoo. Over the years Renny has given enough bad weave jobs to assure that there are a couple dolls with pink wigs already being tortured.
Next the houseguests have to decide, sight unseen, how many Madagascar hissing cockroaches are in a tank. The tank is covered and the only way to determine the amount was to stick your hand in before the game began. Since April was the only one wishing to connect with her ancestors, no one else had the slightest idea. Dan came the closest with his ability to differentiate hisses from his years as a teacher.
Thirdly everyone remaining has to discern how many ounces of blood are in the punch bowl and glasses on the table. Jerry and Ollie both fold on this hand, which leaves Dan the winner of another point. At this point we can hear April whimper from the sidelines at all that perfectly good, delicious blood gone to waste.
Lastly Dan, Ollie, and Jerry are left to determine how many nails are hammered into a bed before it's dragged back to the Chenbots guest room. When Jerry guesses a "bajoogidygillion" and Jerry guesses "olive loaf," Dan is crowned the winner of the golden power of Veto.
Later in the house April tells Ollie that A: he's good for nothing and B: she will do whatever it takes to get Dan to use the Veto on her. Seriously, anything. She will smile even though it gives her shooting pains in her stomach. April also remembers that she still has gold bars that she can use to sway Dan to her side just like pirates used to use in their reality shows. She can also promise that neither she nor Ollie will put Dan up on the block if they get HOH.
Why is Jerry the only one with a flattering doll? No fair!
Meanwhile Jerry takes Dan aside and picks this completely random moment to apologize for his "Judas" comment last week. After this sincere outpouring of emotions from Jerry, and April offering up her word and gold bars, neither of which are actually worth anything, Dan has made a decision. He says April has big, bleach blond hair and you can see her coming a mile away (unless there's a snow storm), whereas Ollie hides behind that hair and ya never know what he's thinking. I'm assuming it's something like "boobies. April boobies. Boobies on April. Boobies de la Abril."
Dan realizes that he is in serious need of a haircut, and pec implants, but first things first. Considering Renny is professional hair stylist Dan offers to let her cut his hair, with serious reservations. Since Renny always wears wigs he's not entirely sure what's going on under there. If it's due to chemo or if it was a dye job that went horribly, horribly awry. Dan offers himself up as a shaggy guinea pig and personally I can't think of anything more terrifying than Renny standing over me with a pair or scissors. Except possibly April standing over me with a hypodermic needle and a shot glass. Lucky for Dan Renny does a fine job and makes Dan look less like Joey Lawrence in Gimme a Break and more like Joey Lawrence in Blossom.
The annual table change takes place while everyone is outside causing them to once again ponder how many people have left and how few remain. Dan says, "Goodbye little spinny thing on top. We'll miss you." It's called a Lazy Suzanne you lazy fuck!
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Comments (18)
Alright, Foz!
"Postcards from the Edge", "Follies" and "Sunset Boulevard" all in one recap, all referring to Renny.
Is there anything she can't gay up?
1 of 18 | Posted by Anonymous | Posted on August 20, 2008 2:54 AM
Fozzie, Loved your reference to the sock-matching game ("IT'S YELLOW! WITH A PURPLE STRIPE!! AND THERE'S A DUCK ON IT!!!"). LOL
And the idea of April using liquid paper as concealer...almost made me wet my pants!
Michelle's game show hosting made me wonder if she had studied with the President ("nucular") or if she thought Ollie was French or something ("Ol LEE").
I absolutely loved Renny's response to Keesha's remark about "loving that big table." Renny: "It was a bitch to dust!" She cracks me up.
Thanks for the great recap!
2 of 18 | Posted by trink621 | Posted on August 20, 2008 7:37 AM
Uh, if you're going to smack down my girl Cindy McCain could you, at least, play fair and give equal treatment to that skank sourpuss Michelle Obama?
Thanks.
Love the Sunset Boulevard reference. That Renny is a smart old bird. She didn't give anything away.
Dan doesn't need a chest implant he just seems to have the body of a 10 year old boy.
Kind of feel sorry for Jerry even though I don't like him. I suspect he's lonely. (But he only has himself to blame!)
3 of 18 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on August 20, 2008 8:16 AM
The cindy McCain joke was right on point. You should have added something about painkillers! Zing!
Hopefully, Cindy McCain's 30yrs look-a-like April, will go home this week. I sorta want the old fart to self-destruct!
4 of 18 | Posted by sowhat1234 | Posted on August 20, 2008 8:28 AM
Foz, your Cindy McCain joke was right on point. You should have added something about painkillers! Zing!
Hopefully Cindy McCain's 30yrs look-a-like April will go home this week. I sorta want the old fart to self-destruct!
5 of 18 | Posted by sowhat1234 | Posted on August 20, 2008 8:30 AM
"Skank sourpuss Michelle Obama"???? Really???? Since this isn't a place to discuss politics or whatever, I'll say nothing, but honestly what the eff.
6 of 18 | Posted by lalia | Posted on August 20, 2008 8:34 AM
Why so angry about Michelle Obama..Geesh Mr Dangerous get a grip.... Someone is off their meds!!
I dont understand why Ollie is even scared of fake birds????
Hopefully Jerry is out ...Crossing my fingers!!
7 of 18 | Posted by thisismarty3 | Posted on August 20, 2008 10:19 AM
When they went outside for the veto competition, someone in my house said "At least there aren't any birds" literally a second before Ollie saw the fake crow.
8 of 18 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on August 20, 2008 2:21 PM
I really admire the way Dan is playing. He keeps his cool even when he has a right to go off. Even when Jerry was apologizing (he seemed sincere, but come on...) he heard him and looked at the situation with strategy instead of emotion.
Love Renny too but once/if Jerry wins HOH she'll be dead in the water.
9 of 18 | Posted by suckitbitches | Posted on August 20, 2008 2:30 PM
I thought Dan was a bit douchey at first, and I'm still not happy with him yelling at me all the time, but I'm pulling for him.
I want to feel sorry for Jerry, but you know that as soon as he gets back in to a position of power he's going to revert back to being Colonel Dickface again.
Outside of bareback banging washed out chicks that look 20 years older than their age, Ollie is completely worthless.
10 of 18 | Posted by Dirty Sanchez | Posted on August 20, 2008 6:22 PM
Hey Mr. Dangerous. I think my comments about Cindy McCain were taken incorrectly. I just meant that she looks like the kind of person who would have bowls of blood, snakes and hissing cockroaches around her. Like a witch sort of. Like someone who may use the things I mentioned above in some kind of "spell" or "incantation" to steal the soul of a child so she can look "young" forever. I hope that clears it up.
11 of 18 | Posted by fozziebare13 | Posted on August 20, 2008 9:02 PM
Fozzie you a such a bad bad boy! You better be careful, the next time someone shakes Cindy's hand her arm will fall off and come crawling straight for your throat.
Loved the recap!
12 of 18 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on August 20, 2008 9:34 PM
Uh, for Lalia, Thisismarty3 and Fonzibear:
This is said with the utmost warmth:
"S*ck on it B*tches!"
Now back to the game. I rewatched the last episode and April DOES LOOK LIKE a young Cindy McCain. I never noticed it before. (Since Cindy went to USC too -- I have to support her. I think that's in the Trojan handbook.)
Love and Kisses.
13 of 18 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on August 21, 2008 8:02 AM
I feel bad saying this, but why must Ollie act like a stereotype from an old 1930's movie? "I's a-scared of everythin! Ooh! What dat?" Seriously, Ollie. Man up and quit acting like Amos. Or Andy.
And why does everyone pronounce his name Ali (like Mohammed Ali) and not Olly (like olly-olly-oxen-free) Maybe its something we don't know. I know that Ollie is actually his last name and his first name is Bryan.
14 of 18 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on August 21, 2008 8:02 AM
Mr Dangerous you had me at S*ck.... CALL ME !!
I love Bitter Angry men!!!
15 of 18 | Posted by Thisismarty | Posted on August 21, 2008 10:08 AM
Fonzie bare. lol
Aaaaaaayyyyy! Thanks Mr. D! Yo!
16 of 18 | Posted by fozziebare13 | Posted on August 21, 2008 10:48 AM
I liked Jery's one man conversations. It was like an eight-year-old in bed trying to go asleep by boring himself tired blabbing on.
17 of 18 | Posted by foxbasealpha | Posted on August 21, 2008 12:07 PM
LOL I wasn't going to mention the Fonzie Bare but I got a good chuckle out of that too. I might have to steal that.
18 of 18 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on August 21, 2008 4:53 PM