Michelle votes to evict Memphis. Rerun and Jerry are with her. LIbra and Keesha both vote against Jessie and then it's Renny's turn. I figured she would just vote against Jessie too but she brought in a boa and started doing a really off key rendition of "Whatever Lola Wants" while grinding on the couch and trying to touch her toes before giving a damn answer.
I vote for boaaaassss daaaahhhhlink!
She actually kind of apologizes with her vote, saying "just when I was about to like you, dahlink". Huh? Maybe all those retarded horn noises Jessie makes remind her of her personal marching band back home. Dan is of course the tie breaker, and the bot stops him before he can call her Mrs. Chen again. LOL, bot, but I think when your entire career depends on the kindness of one leather faced billionaire who runs a network, you're Mrs. Chen. No offense. America has voted to evict Jessie! NOOOOOOOOO!!!! HE'S HILARIOUS! Jessie's a total dick face, but man, he's entertaining. Ah well, at least we get to see Michelle lose it even more. YAYYY!!
When ChenChen tells Jess he's toast, he robotically gets up and silently hugs his friends and leaves. The only time he speaks is on his way out, when he tells Dan "It's your word. It's your word." We know what he means, but it's great to see Jessie's last words in the house make no sense. As he opens the door, there is one person clapping very loudly. At first I thought it must be Keesha, but turns out it was the audience wrangler. Wait. Was it? Back in the house, someone is clapping in rhythm. Who the hell is it?
No one says a thing. They just silently wait around for the ice to be broken, but it never is. Ollie holds up three fingers to count, but he doesn't get very far before he shuts up. Michelle stalks angrily all over the house in her unitaaahd and glittery high heels, and it's just beautiful. I LOVE IT. Everyone is afraid of her, and they should be. She acted like an asshole even when she was trying to impress a guy, now all bets are off. She keeps staring them all down like she's gonna bite them as she walks the house looking absolutely ridiculous. HAHA.
Nope huh uh. Wadn't me. Maybe they miscounted? Rerun, count again!
Then Michelle goes to the relaxation room, and as if she's figured out the America's Player thing, she looks straight at us and punches her fist. Damn.
Ok, this isn't funny anymore. Sorry, hon! You're so perty! There are other fishes....please don't hit me.
Out with the bot, Jessie is trying his hardest not to cry. LOL. Chen asks him what he meant with "your word. Your word" and Jessie spits out English words that don't go together. He does get one dig in, though, by telling America that Dan doesn't even go to church on Sunday and he's a Catholic. Ooooh. I'll bet St. Mary's is all up in arms right now getting ready to refund his thithes and kick his ass to the curb for some lame non denominational Christian school to take pity on. Those non denoms are a bunch of hippies.
ChenChen asks him if he has any regrets, you know, like being a total asshole to everyone. His answer in quotations (because we never get to do it again waaah): "I actually don't have one thing I regret cuz I called everybody out for face value. All their actions spoke and, again, more actions and then...initially I was gonna be going after Dan, Keesha and Libra, Libra being the head the tip of the arrow, so..." What was the question?
Big girls cry, too.
Chen mentions the fact that a bunch of the HG's called him arrogant to his face and he tells her only one did that. She looks down at her cards, cuz that's a load of crap, and asks him who. His answer: "Keesha. Keesha did, but I don't think by me being on the block three out of four weeks and the other time me being HOH I don't see how I ever felt safe or...as far as I'm concerned my name and arrogance shouldn't be the same sentence." Then Julie says "Shouldn't be in the zame ssnenssszzzz". He's shorted out the bot! She names HG's and asks him to describe them in one word. He's like "woah. One word?" And she's like "one word only. Only ONE WORD." And he's like "one?" and she's all "one!"
Jerry: He's in really good shape.
Let's try this again. ONE WORD.
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Comments (22)
OK, everyone...let's hear what your one-word response would be when you hear the same houseguests' names that Julie gave Jessie. Was it really as hard as Jessie made it seem? And why didn't he get mad at America disrespecting him when he was trying to sleep? (It really would have been funny, btw, if one of the recorded messages was someone sounding like Renny that first night in the house!)
1 of 22 | Posted by trink621 | Posted on August 8, 2008 6:10 AM
Oh Flip, I am on vacation at the in-laws and I haven't seen the show since the last live show. I have been reading the recaps. What a great way to wake up -- bye bye Jessie. I have been snickering to myself so nobody knows what I am doing. Great recap! Too many funny things. I can't wait to get home a go through my TiVo and see all the hijinks. You make it sound like I missed a good week.
Many hearts to you.
2 of 22 | Posted by bbjunkie | Posted on August 8, 2008 6:14 AM
Why are that dude's jorts on Dan's football team so freakin tight? They're like spandex jorts. sick.
This was such a good episode! Great recap Flip! and is it just me, or is Rerun's head getting bigger by the episode??
3 of 22 | Posted by carrie | Posted on August 8, 2008 7:11 AM
I really liked Jessie, and was sad to see him go. However, him leaving had the potential to stir up much much more drama, so it's a fair trade. Michelle winning HOH was the best. I hope it's non-stop meltdowns this week.
I'm so excited for next week. Bring on the real BB players!
4 of 22 | Posted by lickitysplit | Posted on August 8, 2008 7:12 AM
Were the before her name and after her name April screencaps supposed to be the same? Or was the before supposed to be Aging Deep Thought Concerned Face?
Hilarious recap - Michelle is going to be insufferable this week. When she was hooting and hollaring after winning, i was like "OK Michelle..we get it. you did it for jessie, and he STILL doesn't want to fuck you."
5 of 22 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on August 8, 2008 8:04 AM
I DO really really hate jorts, but I had to laugh there because I'm pretty sure they dressed that ridiculously on purpose.
And also, Dan's sister is HOT.
6 of 22 | Posted by schoonie | Posted on August 8, 2008 8:18 AM
Also, WORD on the 'Everyone needs to shut up about the Hawaiian vacation already' monologue.
7 of 22 | Posted by schoonie | Posted on August 8, 2008 8:19 AM
hey guys!! thanks dp! i changed the pics! xo ps schoon of course you like that skinny girl and i don't think anyone dresses like those poor boys on purpose. ;)
8 of 22 | Posted by flipit | Posted on August 8, 2008 9:04 AM
Hi All! Just ran across this blog post and had to comment.
Flip, seriously, I had tears streamin from laughing so much at your recap.
I've been a BB watcher for years and what happened on the last show is exactly why I watch it. It's become a familiar pattern. The flip in house control which in turn leads to an HOH winner out for revenge. The looks on their faces every season is 'Oh shit' on both sides for opposite reasons.
As far as the one word description for the HG's, it would have to be; Liar and would apply to all. If you watch BB After Dark, you get an additional 3 hours per night for the viewers to catch all of their lies and badmouthing each other.
My question is, do they not watch the show and pick up clues about what to do an not do while they are in there. Do they learn nothing?
This gang has got to be some of the most childish BB's I've seen, to get to the point that a 75 year old man has become a gossipy school girls. Sheesh!
The next week or so will be pretty entertaining to watch.
Thanks again for the lols Flipit.
9 of 22 | Posted by DeAnne1233 | Posted on August 8, 2008 9:33 AM
That Memphis sure is a charismatic fellow. At least Jessie was good for a few laughs, intentional or not.
Damn deviant Libra! Maybe she rolls her head in a very perverse way.
Anyone else notice that Ollie has that "Shit, I banged this crazy chick and now I can't get rid of her" look on his face when April talks to him? Just a few more weeks Rerun and you'll be home free.
10 of 22 | Posted by Dirty Sanchez | Posted on August 8, 2008 10:19 AM
Flippit, you are an absolute genious. Thanks for the hilarious recap as always!
Loves and kisses!
11 of 22 | Posted by renoblondee | Posted on August 8, 2008 10:39 AM
Sorry about the double p there Flip, typo.... you know who you are I guess, lol.
12 of 22 | Posted by renoblondee | Posted on August 8, 2008 10:41 AM
Hey, Schoonie. While I was watching the show with the jorts-wearing football team montage, I may have actually seen Joe from BB8 in that group.
13 of 22 | Posted by nerrawllehctim | Posted on August 8, 2008 11:16 AM
Are we sure this isn't Flipbot knocking out all these speedy recaps . . . after all, it's not like our flip it to ponder ending drinking . . . is it!?
Hysterical, Flip, and like the rest, guess we all enjoy some douchery and perhaps will be missing it, but I'm very glad to see the split finally happen and the claws to come out. Good thing Libra got the vaca, coz she's likely toast!!! Well played by Dan, I'm glad to be liking him, and I thought the joy jumps were funny!!! GWRerun just doesn't seem to be the brightest, huh, and glad April isn't lost in delusions of love and is instead just getting some!!!
With Douchey gone, I mean Jessie, hopefully Renny will come out of her shell a bit more and bring on some party girl!!! XOXO
14 of 22 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on August 8, 2008 11:20 AM
Heyyyyy, I LIKE a big ass in jorts... it's such a straight-boy fashion thing (and I like white-trash guys, too). Eh, I'm weird that way, I guess, but Jessie didn't do nothin' for me at all (other than make me want to stab my eardrums and burn my corneas). Flipit, you are da mastah of da ass!
love, J-Mo :)
15 of 22 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on August 8, 2008 12:28 PM
I am so glad to see Jessie go. Jerry needs to leave too, so annoying lately. Also didn't the BB producers think that waking up a 75 year old man with loud sounds might not have been a good idea. Although I guess they thought a heart attack would equal ratings.
Flip: thanks for the Hawaii rant. I feel the same way about people that think all women should have kids. Some of us just don't want to be breeders.
This next week should be interesting.
16 of 22 | Posted by Pixi-stix | Posted on August 8, 2008 12:40 PM
Memphis sure is sitting pretty right now, remember Brian's prediction?
Bye bye Jessie! You are the idiot that did this to yourself.
17 of 22 | Posted by suckitbitches | Posted on August 8, 2008 12:57 PM
This episode was awesome! My Mom and I were on the edge of our seats when the HOH came down to Libra and Michelle and then when Michelle won it, we got almost as loud as she did! Libra has got to go!! I don't even care who she puts up beside her. Just get that annoying woman out of the house. Speaking of that annoying woman, what was with the crap she was giving Jessie for just "sleeping and eating"? If I'm not mistaken, EVERY TIME they cut to Libra in the house she is in bed. And some of Keesha's comments last night pissed me off too. She didn't think it was right to have to vote the way April wanted and yet when she was HOH, everyone had to vote the way SHE wanted. Those two simply make me sick and must be dealt with.
And Flip, Jen will be part of the houseguests coming back. When Julie was talking about it, they showed the people on the screen, one from each of the previous seasons... :-)
18 of 22 | Posted by JustJesse | Posted on August 8, 2008 1:20 PM
Flip, you rock.
But first:
What the hell was up with Dan's "football" "team"?
'80's era Falcon video, anyone?
19 of 22 | Posted by Anonymous | Posted on August 8, 2008 4:44 PM
At the end of the show, Chenbot mentioned that houseguests from previous seasons were going to compete against the current turds. Wonder who they will be (Bunky? Jen? Matty? Chicken George?)and what the competition involve them doing?
20 of 22 | Posted by foxbasealpha | Posted on August 8, 2008 4:45 PM
From what I gathered/saw there is:
1- Chicken George
2- Bunky?
3- Amy
4- Jun
5- Jase
6- Janelle
7- Boogie
8- Jen
9- Matty
21 of 22 | Posted by bentley1101 | Posted on August 8, 2008 10:14 PM
I don't get it...we're supposed to stick up for Libra now? She's almost as annoying as Jessie--actually even more so because Jessie was a hoot and Libra's just plain boring. So why can't I spank her for ditching her kids? Can I at least make fun of her for always posing with her 'good side' facing the camera?
Anyone notice that Renny keeps looking better and better each week? Maybe it's just because the other gals get more and more haggard.
Can't help myself, I like Dan. And even more now that I see his hot sis (despite the collision with the Avon delivery van). Of course, now that I said I like Dan, he'll be booted out next week. Sorry, fella.
22 of 22 | Posted by itchy | Posted on August 11, 2008 9:30 AM