We begin tonight's episode in the middle of the HoH endurance comp. Man, this whole two episodes in a row thing means I'm recapping the whole competition. It's like, how many different ways can I say 'some losers prop themselves up in a box'?
First of all, Natalie looks mad skanky in her box. She's spread eagle, awkwardly positioned, and is probably not wearing a bra. All encased in glass like that, she looks like a slutty entomology project. Sharon yells at us in the HOH about how she's the "last man standing" from her alliance, so she has to win. They all celebrate the eviction of James, with Natalie throwing some more ridiculous numerology at us about how it all had to do with the number nine and that means that it was God's master plan, because seven plus two is nine and so is four and five, or whatever the hell. You know what I'm guessing? I bet Natalie watches LOST and has a whole bunch of ridiculous conspiracy theories that she posts on the internet. She's probably all "Ben and Kate are actually the same person!" on some message board somewhere.
Natalie blabs her ass of in her glass cage of emotion (I'm sorry, I had to) forever and ever, and Sharon speaks for all of us by rolling her eyes repeatedly at Natalie. She follows up by saying that her back hurts and dropping out of the comptetion. I maybe would have tried a bit harder if I were her, but you know. Adam carries her to a chair like it's the end of The Bodyguard, for some reason.
Ryan is all sweaty and it's gross, and tells us all about how "Team Christ" (gag) is running the house. Sheila starts trying to guilt trip everyone into giving her HOH by telling them that she wants to see the photos of her kids and bringing this personal stuff down upon them. After 56 minutes, all three people are still up in the boxes. Natalie and Sheila have this passive-aggressive argument about winning and never giving up and how it wouldn't mean anything to win if everyone just gives up. Keep that one in mind when Sheila is telling us how hard she worked for the win here in a little bit. Ryan tells Adam that he has "scabs" on his hands. Yeah, that's because his knuckles are dragging on the ground all of the time.
After two hours, everyone is still up. Adam and Sharon go inside at the same time to run some errands (which doesn't seem wise, given the situation). The three remaining outside, of course, start making deals with each other to put up Adam and Sharon. They agree to throw the competition to Sheila, as long as she won't nominate either of them. Sheila tells us that her only priority is to protect Adam, even if that means putting him up. Wait....how does that make sense?
They decide to slowly drop out so that it doesn't look like they made a deal. Ryan immediately takes a fall, and Natalie starts to equivocate and act completely dumb for what seems like hours. Sharon takes up for Sheila, because she knows that Natalie is putting on an act. Natalie says, out loud, "What would Jesus do?" Really, Natalie? REALLY? Sharon is like "are you kidding? Jesus would drop." I don't know about that. I bet Jesus was probably a pretty competitive guy.
Sheila starts to worry that Natalie is going to "reneg" on the deal. Natalie starts acting and making a big deal way, way too much, talking and going on and on, which Sharon starting at her sarcastically the whole time. Sharon effing hates Natalie, you can totally tell. Natalie is all "my good nature makes me want to drop!" which is ridiculous. You are not allowed to call yourself "good natured", it's against the rules. So Natalie finally drops out and Sheila is HOH. Sheila tells us how proud she is about what she accomplished, because nobody thought she could win or believed that she was such a strong player in competitions. Hint: you still aren't. She even freaking hits her head on the ground as she drops out of the box. It's like she can't even fall on her face correctly.
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Comments (12)
It's funny weeks ago I couldn't stand Sheila and oddly enough I was rooting for Natalie basically because I hated James & Joshua.
Now I find myself rooting for Sheila and now I can't stand Natalie. What is this show doing to me? Watch, if Natalie leaves hopefully, I probably find myself rooting for that racist Ryan, and trust me he is a racist.
1 of 12 | Posted by bigjr6633 | Posted on April 13, 2008 11:25 PM
Thanks for the recap Schoonie . . . not much for you to work with here. My DVR only recorded about 20 min of the show because something earlier in the day must have ran overtime . . . and as ususal I didn't really care that much. Already looking forward to BB10. As long as neither Natalie or Sheila win this thing I'll be happy. If Sheila wins she's think she's some kind of genius when it will only be because she was so annoying and inept it seemed like a good idea to keep her around.
2 of 12 | Posted by JasonR | Posted on April 14, 2008 6:32 AM
Have to admit, Sheila is not only making smarter decisions, she seems more poised and decisive. And that photo of her at 25 was awesome. Made me go google "Sheila Kennedy Penthouse" and, other than a bit bushier than she should have been for a photo shoot, the woman was a real beauty. Must have been a hard 21 years since then.
This plan is entirely contingent on Natalie not winning POV. If she does, then they're all screwed, losing Adam or Sharon. That will give Gnat control for one more week, allowing her to be in a more dominant position.
Ryan is fairly dumb. What the hell, he's a Buckeye! But I don't think there's ever been any proof he's a racist, other than Jen's pathetic attempt to smear him in order to stay in the house. Maybe we should all get off that rant, huh? Better concentrate on misogynists Matt and Joshy. Those two little pukes are probably sneaking kisses at sequester by now.
Have to admit I don't understand the fascination with faux celebrity Evel Dick. He's loathsome and scrofulous, looks dirty even when he's clean. I do give him props for cleverness, but that's about it. He's an asshat. And, as far as I'm concerned, Dr. Will is still the greatest player ever in BB.
3 of 12 | Posted by talma63 | Posted on April 14, 2008 6:33 AM
It's easy for Sheila to talk like a big badass when she's HOH and "old Sheila" hadn't even come close to winning anything before this competition.
I am sick of her on this power trip already. I really hope she doesn't get to the final 2, but i wonder if Ryan and/or Adam would take her thinking they have a better chance of beating her than each other.
Also, i know everyone is tired of Natalie, but they really need to get Sharon out because it's all of her friends in the jury house.
4 of 12 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on April 14, 2008 7:37 AM
I realy think anyone saying Shelia won this challenge is wrong. She was given the challenge and I don't care if she thought she could have stayed in that box another hour we all know Natalie would have stayed in the box three days.
I see the feeds and feedcap the spoilers in the forums and I will not give up any secrets here but will state this:
The Producers of Big Brother alter what really happens in the house into a program that is entertaining but not consistantly factual.
5 of 12 | Posted by giffordsaz | Posted on April 14, 2008 7:50 AM
I had to go Google her Penthouse pics from 25 years ago as well. She was quite the looker back in the day, but good lord - couldn't they have trimmed her up a bit? It looked like she had a rabbi in a headlock.
I'm pretty much pulling for Ryan. He's not a sloth (Sharon), or spastic and hormonal (Sheila and Nat), and I don't need subtitles when he speaks (Adam).
6 of 12 | Posted by Dirty Sanchez | Posted on April 14, 2008 9:18 AM
"Adam quickly realizes"
Isn't that like, an oxymoron statement? Just thought I'd put it out there. LOL
Great Recap!
7 of 12 | Posted by twnpeeks | Posted on April 14, 2008 11:23 AM
I loved your gag about Ryan's having scabs since "his knuckles are dragging on the ground all of the time" -- super funny!Also, good call about Sharon yelling in the diary room. Maybe it's the military upbringing.
And bigjr 6633 -- I was rooting for Natalie until they showed her as a Jesus freak, and now find myself hoping Adam or Sheila will win.
8 of 12 | Posted by C MacKenzie | Posted on April 14, 2008 12:26 PM
Natalie needs to go like two weeks ago. Who the f. does she think she is yelling at people and ordering them around? She sucks. What would Jesus do to Natalie? He'd send her p*ssy to the Jury. That would make for great television b/c we'd get to see her make a fool of herself over "Matty".
9 of 12 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on April 14, 2008 3:42 PM
I don't know if it has occured to Nat yet, but if she sends Sharon to the jury house, guess which group will decide the BB9 winner with 4 votes out of 7? Good luck with that, Nat!
10 of 12 | Posted by annieo | Posted on April 14, 2008 9:01 PM
I don't know if it has occured to Nat yet, but if she sends Sharon to the jury house, guess which group decides the BB9 winner with 4 votes out of 7? Good luck with that, Nat!
11 of 12 | Posted by User Name | Posted on April 14, 2008 9:03 PM
Someone posted that there hasn't been proof that Ryan is racist... actually, there has... Jen said that Ryan "disapproves" of interracial relationships, and finds them "disgusting." Ryan was standing right there when she said this, and confirmed that this was his belief.
Now, he somehow thinks it's possible to believe this and not be a racist, because he allegedly has black friends, but obviously, to believe that interracial relationships are "disgusting" is to be a racist.
12 of 12 | Posted by 773SleepyHollow | Posted on April 22, 2008 9:30 PM