Back from commercial, Julie gets her time to talk to the houseguests! I always look forward to this part, because it's like what happens if you string the awkward silences from a thousand dates together. She asks Matt whether there was any doubt that things might not go his way before the veto ceremony, which is a dumb question to which Matt gives a dumb stock answer. Then Julie asks Natalie about whether her relationship with Matt has changed since the game switched to an individual one. Natalie is all nervous and smiley and uses no punctuation and glares at Julie with her big scary eyes, and her answer is like "No Julie it has not changed we still sleep in the same bed and are great friends and he's my partner and also my cat's breath smells like cat food!" Why have I not noticed that Natalie and Ralph Wiggum are the exact same person until now?
The best part is that the whole time, Matt is in the background making faces like "Um, she is totally nuts. Please do not ask her any more questions about me." Julie asks Matt what his feelings for Nat are, and he tells Julie that they're "great friends" and then uses the term "BFFL". Chen searches her slang compendium and is like SYNTAX ERROR, so she says "Wait, BFFL? I thought it was just BFF?" And when Matt explains that it means "Best Friends For Life", Julie is very gravely like "I have learned something here today." as if it were an after-school special, and it is amazing.
Then Sheila gets a unitard montage in which her motions are compared with Jen's, which only serves to make me miss Jen more because Jen is awesome and Sheila sucks, and then everyone votes that Sheila looks better in the red unitard than Jen, which is not true times one thousand. I wish just one person had raised their hand for Jen, just to see how Sheila would have turned it into a personal vendetta upon which to seek revenge.
Back from another commercial, it's time to see how the evicted houseguests have been doing in sequester! Each pair got their own house, and here's a quick, bullet point synopsis of what's gone on:
• Jacob prays at his house and is really, really boring.
• Parker and Jen live together and are of different races! My stars!
• Amanda and Alex hate each other. He blames her for the eviction while they argue.
• Allison also gets her own house, in which she does yoga because she is pretentious. Send her back, it would be hilarious and awesome!
When we come back, all the evicted houseguests are assembled on the steps. Parker's hair is mad odd. There are also an insane amount of microphone issues here; Julie keeps interviewing people and we keep getting little snippets of conversation from inside the house. I think Adam might be inside chewing on some wires or something.
So, here's how it's going to work: the person who won America's vote will face off against the houseguest that gets evicted tonight in a house vote, and that person will return to the house. The best part is that they have to hide inside a "mystery box", which is the most embarrassing thing ever. "You want back in? Jump out of this cake!" This show is so corny.
So, Parker gets second (WTF?) and Alex wins! He looks shocked as we head into commercial. Called it, Flip and Fozz!
Commercials. I hope Jonathan Penner's knee is okay; he seriously rules, and if he were to be taken out of the game on an injury, that would be unfortunate.
We're back, and it's time to find out who's leaving! Julie evicts James by a 5-1 vote. James actually gets up and heads for the door before Julie finishes, so you can tell he kind of knows it's coming. Everyone but Chelsia stays in their seats as she walks him to the door. After he leaves, she tries not to cry or get upset but she is a little shaken up.
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Comments (12)
I would love to have Madeyoulaugh and Flipit come to my house with or without their tire irons. I would grill up some fresh salmon and Alaskan King Crab, open a few local Alaskan ales or imported California chardonnays and invite the bears in to watch Big Brother with us.
1 of 12 | Posted by caughtdoinit | Posted on March 13, 2008 8:04 PM
Tonight's episode has restored my faith in BB. This season might not be a total waste after all. My favorite part was Chenbot freaking out when everyone was talking over her. It was hysterical.
Oh yea and my boyfriend rewound the show 5 times and kept asking 'Who's the dude in the yellow shirt?' when all the evicted guests where on the porch. What was up with Parker's dp?
2 of 12 | Posted by mere2142 | Posted on March 13, 2008 8:15 PM
Tonight's episode has restored my faith in BB...this season might not totally suck afterall.
Chenbot freaking out over the people talking over her was priceless.
My boyfriend replayed all of the houseguests on the front porch and kept asking who the dude in the yellow shirt was because he didn't even recognize Parker.
3 of 12 | Posted by mere2142 | Posted on March 13, 2008 8:17 PM
alex's buuueeeennoo killed me.
i also love natalie. she's great tv.
i think if sharon was evicted alex would be in the house right now (no cbs box twist at all)
4 of 12 | Posted by nestofvipers | Posted on March 14, 2008 12:59 AM
Hey Schoonie, conjugate your verbs!
"There ARE sparkles and disco balls and unicorns."
Teehee ;-)
So, Adam and Nat totally boned it by voting James back in, right? While they still have the numbers on their side, what could be worse than a nerd herder scorned? "Mystery Contestant" would have totally been psyched just to have the opportunity to return.
5 of 12 | Posted by Scarlet | Posted on March 14, 2008 6:41 AM
Loved the part when Natalie found out about Matty kissing Sharon. That whole sequence which ends with Matty eventually apologizing was fascinating. I didn't know there were people like Natalie in the world and then I looked in the mirror.
Josh will never stab Ryan in the back. Josh is to Ryan what Natalie is to Matty.
6 of 12 | Posted by weasel dearest | Posted on March 14, 2008 8:56 AM
I really hope other people noticed this: near the end of the show, when the houseguests were on their disco balls, there was a quick close-up camera shot of their hamster (or gerbil)!! It was a RIOT! It was when Julie was asking James something.
Did anyone else catch this?!
7 of 12 | Posted by C MacKenzie | Posted on March 14, 2008 9:37 AM
Scarlet, I agree. It made no sense for Adam (and especially Natalie) to vote James back in, when they'd just voted him out. He obviously knew his only vote was from Chelsia. I bet Natalie is so dumb that she thought he wouldn't be mad at her since she voted to bring him back in.
I would much rather have seen Alex back in the house than James. Ryan's HOH week was basically useless and now he is going to be targeted unless Matt win HOH basically.
8 of 12 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on March 14, 2008 10:46 AM
You're right. Natalie is lovable because she's so vulnerable. Airhead, yes. Sweet, also yes. She was picked for the show precisely for those reasons.
Now, Chelsia has developed some serious jones for James, but how will she feel when she discovers he's a gay porn actor? I'd like to see THAT follow-up after the show! Frankly, with all the dangers involved in that profession, I think it was bad of CBS to pick him or not reveal the "guests" true professions before the show.
I honestly don't understand the thinking behind bringing James back in immediately after bouncing him out. Ryan was the only one with a justifiable reason to vote to bring him back, because he was afraid he may have been voting Jen away, but I can't see anyone else's earthly reason to do so.
Ah, well, this ship of fools continues on its merry way. Does anyone else think Matty is serously in the closet? NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH IT!
9 of 12 | Posted by talma63 | Posted on March 14, 2008 11:19 AM
I was pretty pissed that again they omitted something that happened. After the POV, Josh and James poured stuff over Nat's head. Pickle juice and water. And then Josh, of course, attacked her. So did Chelsia, and the stuff she said that day is one of the reasons she disgusts me. I won't even repeat it here.
Honestly I think they came up with the mystery box idea that day, after the contestants casted their votes and the producers knew James would be going home. Why not make more drama by giving him the chance to stay??
I would have loved to see Alex back =(
10 of 12 | Posted by pixi-stix | Posted on March 14, 2008 12:10 PM
That episode was a waste of my time. I intend to read solely the recap from this point forward!
I don't care how cute you all think Natalie is...she's an idiot! Her I.Q is comparable to a plant or a gerbil! If any of these idiots (Adam and Natalie) had some brains, they would have voted for the mystery houseguest. They had the numbers. If Alex was swarn in, he would have allied himself with the Matt and Ryan alliance.
I think its understood that none of these fools are playing the game properly or are playing the game at all!
You may all disagree; but, Chelsia, James, Joshua and Sharon are the new nerd herd!
11 of 12 | Posted by sowhat1234 | Posted on March 14, 2008 2:59 PM
You're so right Schoonie! Natalie IS Ralph Wiggum. I can totally picture her sad face as a train Valentine falls to the floor and she says, "But Matty, I choo-choo-choose you." So true, hilarious and kind of sad all at the same time.
12 of 12 | Posted by SnackyCakes420 | Posted on March 15, 2008 4:58 PM