The bot interviews Moose and asks him what the deal is with Sheila. He shouts that he trusts Sheila and believes that she will support him til the end. He was just having fun by threatening to put her up. At least I think that's what he said. My speakers blew out. Seriously, dude. You're wearing a mic. Shhhh. He says that he lied and said he wouldn't have voted Alex back in had he known he was in the mystery box because Hobo Hank was sitting right there, but it doesn't matter now because he put Hank on the block and was now a target. He is smiling really big and he seems to be under the impression that he is Prince Charming, and it's disgusting but also kinda cute.
Like Bindi, the LUCKIEST LITTLE GIRL IN THE WHOOOOOLE WORLD!!!
Time for the "why you should vote for me to stay" speeches. Sharon is calm, tanned, smiley and pretty(ish) tonight, and she gracefully says that if it's her time she'll accept it and if not she'd love to stay and enjoy the company of her fellow human beings. Then Chelsia gets up and starts making crazy faces and pointing at everyone and saying she never changed for anyone (to which Sheila nods encouragingly, LOL) and she never breast fed off anyone in the house. Uh....thanks for that? James puts his head in his hands, and he actually looks better like that. Point is, this bitch is officially bonkers.
How to Win Friends and Scare the Living Shit Out of People
Every single HG votes to evict her ass. Even James, who knew that she would be out regardless of his vote. That's pretty cold. He runs back out into the living room and does a triumphant girly jump. What a prick.
I think we can all agree that the color pink is owed an apology tonight.
On her way out, Chelsia tells Moose to get a backbone, Nat to get an education, and says that Shelia has been rode hard and will be put away wet. LOL. That one was good. Then she hugs Josh and says that she loves him, which totally figures. I think that she must not know what "unanimous" means, because she hugged Hobo Hank twice and kissed him. Hullo? He just screwed you over. As she leaves, she screams "blow this house up!" Cookoo Cookoo. The HG's aren't really stunned. They're amused. Poor Chelsia can't even manipulate a simple reaction. LOOZA.
Wait, I take that back. She got Sheila. "She's just jealous because I was in Penthouse Magazine." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA. Every young girl's dream, Sheila. I am really starting to warm up to her. Chelsia comes out to talk to the bot and says that she's not mad at her bf for voting against her because she wants him to win it if she can't and her biggest mistake was voting him back in in the first place. Then she says all sorts of other annoying crazy bs and I FF because frankly I was done with this bozo two weeks ago. What a c word.
Goodbye messages, yay! Josh says that he is so so sorry they couldn't win together and he will avenge her. Every HG this year is Charles fucking Bronson. "I will avenge you" is the "you threw me under the bus" of 2008. Chelsia cries and cries like she just won Miss America. Sharon says nothing of importance as usual, and Nat comes on with a big smile and says that she's praying for Chelsia. HAH. The following pic is just too beautiful to mar with a caption.
Hobo Hank says that he wants to be with Chelsia outside the house and it's worth more than $500,000 to do it. Riiight. That's why you saved yourself instead of her and then voted her out. This guy is so full of shit. I would hate him, but he's delivered to Chelsia exactly what she deserves. For that, thank you. Now please someone evict this tard. Chelsia cries and cries and cries and says that she needs to watch the season and get a TB shot before she commits to hanging with the hobo outside the house. Good riddance, a hole.
The HOH comp is called BB Election. America was asked questions about the HG's. Whoever guesses what America said the most times out of seven while wearing white blinding goggles and Jessica Rabbit gloves wins. I just reread that sentence and yup, it is as dumb as I thought it was as it came out.
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Comments (26)
omg.....i am now on team Natalie. I saw it coming but wow! Go Nat!
1 of 26 | Posted by mistichristi | Posted on March 27, 2008 7:24 AM
ha what a perfect episode for Team Nat! Chelsea still gets the dream edit though because she was far worse then they showed. although so were josh and james at one pt not that you'd know it from the cbs show. j/j on the block this week for sure!! haha!
2 of 26 | Posted by nestofvipers | Posted on March 27, 2008 8:14 AM
This is funniest recap I ever read, I couldn't stop laughing.
Yes, I am Team Natalie now, she's still the most ridicolous person on this show, but she's probably the most likable one too. I would root for Ryan but that racist thing always gets me.
3 of 26 | Posted by bigjr6633 | Posted on March 27, 2008 8:14 AM
Chel - SEE YA! I couldn't stand her from the get-go.
GO NAT GO!
4 of 26 | Posted by lexxi1129 | Posted on March 27, 2008 8:21 AM
You know things are bad when even Hobo Hank doesn't want to be associated with you!!! I am routing for Ryan right now. I just don't believe that racist thing. I think Jen just talks out of her ass.
You crack me up, Flipit!!!
5 of 26 | Posted by featherhead | Posted on March 27, 2008 9:34 AM
Great recap Flipit!! I love Natalie. She is just so HUMAN. I love watching her figuring out all her clues. At least she tries. So glad to see "C" go and I do not mean Chelsia. Has this creature taken a good luck in the mirror lately? She has some nerve calling other people names and putting them down. What an immature child. The show tonight showed that. She did the deed for all of TV world to see and with JAMES..YUCK !! I am pulling for Team Nat to go all the way. Good bye Joshua I hope, he is just another nasty person.
6 of 26 | Posted by Rvrctylady | Posted on March 27, 2008 10:01 AM
Great recap Flipit!! I love Natalie. She is just so HUMAN. I love watching her figuring out all her clues. At least she tries. So glad to see "C" go and I do not mean Chelsia. Has this creature taken a good luck in the mirror lately? She has some nerve calling other people names and putting them down. What an immature child. The show tonight showed that. She did the deed for all of TV world to see and with JAMES..YUCK !! I am pulling for Team Nat to go all the way. Good bye Joshua I hope, he is just another nasty person.
7 of 26 | Posted by Rvrctylady | Posted on March 27, 2008 10:01 AM
Great recap Flipit!! I love Natalie. She is just so HUMAN. I love watching her figuring out all her clues. At least she tries. So glad to see "C" go and I do not mean Chelsia. Has this creature taken a good luck in the mirror lately? She has some nerve calling other people names and putting them down. What an immature child. The show tonight showed that. She did the deed for all of TV world to see and with JAMES..YUCK !! I am pulling for Team Nat to go all the way. Good bye Joshua I hope, he is just another nasty person.
8 of 26 | Posted by Rvrctylady | Posted on March 27, 2008 10:03 AM
OOPS!! sorry for the triple comment. Computer at work is going crazy today.
9 of 26 | Posted by Rvrctylady | Posted on March 27, 2008 10:07 AM
I kind of felt bad for Adam's mom because you know his family knows he was fired, but they can't say a thing. So instead they talk up all his good deeds to try and redeem him, but in the meantime call him Rain Man lol.
I am so happy the C is dead. Her outburst was laughable, but she probably thought she was just so cool. She's only 21 and needs to desperately grow up. And, yes Nat may not be that bright, but telling someone that they need an education is lame. At least she's doing something with her life, and doesn't fall for skanky hobos.
If Josh or James leave this week I'll be very happy.
GO NAT GO!!!!
10 of 26 | Posted by pixi-stix | Posted on March 27, 2008 10:19 AM
Why does every picture of Nat look like she's absolutely bat-shit crazy? Oh wait...I know why.
11 of 26 | Posted by wattage | Posted on March 27, 2008 10:24 AM
The rode hard and put away wet comment totally went over Sheila's head. I was watching the live feeds last night after the show and she was whining about it saying that it must be something those biker-bar-type-people must say. James just sat at the table shaking his head and smiling. For anyone else who don't know, it's an equestrian phrase. When you give a horse a good workout ride, they salivate profusely. If you don't give them a cool-down, that's known as being put away wet. The phrase has transformed into a sexual euphamism. Oh! Those biker bar people!
12 of 26 | Posted by Scarlet | Posted on March 27, 2008 11:00 AM
Was Sheila really in Penthouse? I thought she was being funny when she said that. LOVED-LOVED-LOVED the comment about Sheila and finishing school. HAAAAAAAA!!!!
Did anyone else notice that Adam's brother looked like Mike "The Miz" from REAL WORLD: New York? I was wondering if Coral was going to show up as his "sister". I was so repulsed when Adam came out of his bedroom adjusting his junk. He is a disgusting ogre.
Did anyone else notice Joshuah jumping like a baby when Evel Dick came into their room? He's a tool.
13 of 26 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on March 27, 2008 1:15 PM
GREAT RECAP.
These people are all so unlikeable!! And unworthy!! They don't even play the friggin' game. I'm sorry, but just because Nat was brutalized by the Biatch Chelsea, I do not have amnesia that she was handing out BJs and remains absolutely delusional that she is in a "relationship" with Matt. NATALIE, THE WHOLE WORLD WATCHED YOUR HEAD BOBBING on night 2! Stop with the bible thumping already. I'm pretty sure Jesus isn't down with the BJs!
I'm gonna have to start rooting (half heartedly) for Sharon. Yes. I said it...Sharon. Ryan would get my vote, but his awful girlfriend Jen would benefit if he won, and my next choice is Adam, but he's just so damn freaky in a special needs kinda way. James/Josh are both scum.
Sharon, while incredibly boring, is the least appalling. And she has flown under the radar pretty successfully.
14 of 26 | Posted by MissThing | Posted on March 27, 2008 6:37 PM
Anybody watching the live feeds would argue with Chelsia that she never breast fed off anyone. She did. Natalie with icecream on her nipples. Not kidding.
I'm rooting for Nutty Natty all the way!
Love ya flipit!
15 of 26 | Posted by CheriesTake | Posted on March 28, 2008 12:06 AM
Loved the recap! I look forward to reading it after every show. Those of you watching the live feeds sure are getting a different view of the people than what we see. What else have we missed?
16 of 26 | Posted by tammy | Posted on March 28, 2008 12:22 AM
tammy-one thing they never showed, for obvious reasons, was Chel and James getting it on all the time, and I don't just mean foreplay-eww. And she was probably one of the nastiest people I've ever seen in the house. I don't even want to write all the gross stuff she did. Also apprently there was a hook up early on between her and Allison, not just kissing either.
Sharon IS actually that boring, and isn't just edited that way. Although she did participate in the pool orgy. And she admitted she cheated on Jacob first.
I don't watch the feeds, but I read Morty's every day. I'm addicted while bored at work lol.
17 of 26 | Posted by pixi-stix | Posted on March 28, 2008 8:38 AM
Such a funny recap! The Ballad of Baller was the best part. His brother was such a weirdo!
I am not on Team Nat at all. I agree completely with MissThing (#14). Natalie is an IDIOT and I cannot in good conscience root for her in any way. Chelsia may have been a bitch and a slut, but at least she owned it. I was actually rooting for Josh to win, because I wanted to see a really really good Sheila freak-out. Oh well, maybe next week.
18 of 26 | Posted by lickitysplit | Posted on March 28, 2008 8:38 AM
I wish I could be a fly on the wall when Chelsia gets back to "real" life and sees the articles and pictures of James' past life. No disinfectant will fix that, girl! Usually people who think they know the most actually know the least. She will find out the hard that she was played worse than Natalie by Matty.
19 of 26 | Posted by wornsey | Posted on March 28, 2008 10:17 AM
I wish I could be a fly on the wall when Chelsia gets back to "real" life and sees the articles and pictures of James' past life. No disinfectant will fix that, girl! Usually people who think they know the most actually know the least. She will find out the hard way that she was played worse than Natalie by Matty.
20 of 26 | Posted by wornsey | Posted on March 28, 2008 10:17 AM
this article sucks..its almost as immature as Chelsia smashing easter eggs..
Natalie fucking sucks..she's ugly, psychotic, and a bible thumper..hope she fucking chokes on the easter eggs she made
21 of 26 | Posted by john_rober | Posted on March 28, 2008 11:48 AM
this article sucks..its almost as immature as Chelsia smashing easter eggs..
Natalie fucking sucks..she's ugly, psychotic, and a bible thumper..hope she fucking chokes on the easter eggs she made
22 of 26 | Posted by john_rober | Posted on March 28, 2008 11:48 AM
thanks pixi-stix, it sounds interesting.what's morty's?
23 of 26 | Posted by tammy | Posted on March 29, 2008 1:04 AM
Id like to meet the asshole who wrote this! fucking kick their ass! peice of shit! a loser like you doesnt deserve to write about big brother, since you suck at it. fucking douche
24 of 26 | Posted by youreanidiot | Posted on March 29, 2008 2:01 AM
tammy-morty's is a site that types up what is going on on the live feeds. Just Google bb udpates, it comes up there.
And I think some of the c's and hobo's loser friends found this site. Suck it asses.
25 of 26 | Posted by pixi-stix | Posted on March 30, 2008 3:30 PM
Couldn't have said it better pixie-stix.
26 of 26 | Posted by CheriesTake | Posted on March 30, 2008 4:08 PM