Dr. Jeff is upset that they made him stay last week, but he swears he's going to make the most of it. Jillian says, "He owes it. To Pete. To keep going. And. He owes it. To. Him. Self." (Is it just me, or is Jillian's delivery becoming more Shatneresque every week?)
Bob decides to take the teams swimming. At least that's what the guys think. The girls, however know better. Because when Bob says "swimming" he actually means ancient Chinese water torture. (Side note: As retina-burning as seeing the contestants in their bathing suits was, worse still was the sight of Jillian's pasty-white thighs. Pass the tanning butter, here comes a stingray!) Shannon tells us, "Now that we're duos, we're doing a lot more group workouts. And the guys are in for a treat." Is Shannon referring to a little afternoon diva delight, perhaps? God, I hope not.
Another photo-finish.
Bob, meanwhile, is encouraging the contestants to take a dump in the pool. Actually, he tells them to "make a splash! One big splash!" Funny thing: this is the same thing my brother and his wife say to my nephew every night at bedtime. Why they tell Trev it's time to "make a big splash" instead of time to "take a dump" is beyond me. The kid's four years old; he knows what "dump" is.
Time for this week's Temptation Challenge. The players find a giant cake waiting for them in the gazebo. On top of the cake is written: "Dig in to find your temptation." Thank goodness Jennifer W. from The Apprentice wasn't in charge of this cake, or it might have read "Dig in to find your tethtation". How confusing would that've been? After hesitating for about a second, everyone dives in and they find a certificate for a free group makeover at the Cristophe Salon in Beverly Hills. Having never been to Beverly Hills, and having the grooming skills of an orangutan, I've never heard of Cristophe's. But if it's anything like the SuperCuts here in Colorado Springs, I'm sure they'll do a bang-up job. They just won't brush the hair off you afterward.
Unbelievably, Matt admits he's never had a makeover. Even more unbelievably, he admits it's been over 18 months since his last haircut. No! Seth says he doesn't need one. Funny, that's not what Carson K. told me last week when we were shopping for sleeves to jooje. Finally, Dr. Jeff asks the question on every guy's lips: What do you wear to a makeover? Besides a thong, of course.
In the salon, Mark tells Christophe to do whatever he wants. Andrea, who's a hairdresser by trade, tells Christophe to do whatever she wants. Matt is scared, and simply says he doesn't want a mullet. Yeah, cuz that mandanna is working so well for you, Matty.
After the contestants get their hair done, they head over to the photo studio, where they'll be gussied up for a special photo shoot for Prevention magazine. The best shot will be featured in an upcoming issue. Of course, Shannon is crossing her fingers she gets a couple of "money shots" so she can get the cover. Um, if it's money shots you're after, Shannon, I don't think you should be crossing anything.
Matt is even more uncomfortable at the photo shoot than he was at the salon. Lighten up, Francis. You can put the mattdanna back on in a minute. Seriously, Matt's level of discomfort made the guys sitting in my proctologist's office last week look like they were on ecstacy. Except they still wouldn't hug the doctor. Or shake his hand afterward. Anyway, the women are chosen for the cover, which should be hitting newsstands any day now.
« Bad Ass, Smoking Hot, and Overall Nice To Come Home To | Main | Socket To Me! »
Comments (23)
Copygodd - are you really in C Springs?
I've been really impressed with the follow up segments these last two weeks. Both Pete and Mark look great now. It'll be interesting to see them all at the finale. You think that douche Nick will even show up? I hope he does and everyone points and laughs that he gave up and still looks like he does when everyone else managed to improve.
1 of 23 | Posted by mountain girl | Posted on November 2, 2005 3:34 PM
Great recap...to a really great show. Sure they're fat--grossly unhealthy--but they're doing something about it and all in all are very good people. Still great reality TV!
2 of 23 | Posted by alohaguy | Posted on November 2, 2005 3:35 PM
Yes, mountain girl, but Nick will be fabulously wealthy off all the royalties for the diet book and exercise plan he said he was selling! He'll just be a fat "RICH" schmuck...
3 of 23 | Posted by Alohaguy@gmail.com | Posted on November 2, 2005 3:37 PM
"Finally, Pete asks the question on every guy's lips: What do you wear to a makeover?"
Wasn't Pete kicked off last week, or is there another Pete?
Great recap, better than watching the show itself!
4 of 23 | Posted by Ash | Posted on November 2, 2005 3:50 PM
mountain girl: you betcha. not all of us recappers live on one of the coasts. actually, i'm only about a mile from garden of the gods, which i can see from my front deck.
ash: good catch. it was actually dr. jeff. i shall fix it post-haste...
5 of 23 | Posted by copygodd | Posted on November 2, 2005 3:52 PM
This was a recap worth staying up for--I guffawed repeatedly throughout this sucker. Thanks; I needed it. Laughter is my only form of exercise...
6 of 23 | Posted by Bobbie | Posted on November 2, 2005 4:21 PM
Well, hello from Denver! I envy your view. I traded mine when I bought my house.
Great recap. Those vagina/ankle jokes never get old. Keep it up.
7 of 23 | Posted by mountain girl | Posted on November 2, 2005 5:04 PM
Great recap! There may not be any villians to hate, but at least you'll always have Caroline and her twins to comment on.
I thought that Matt looked seriously disturbed during the makeover and the photo shoot. What is up with him???
So glad that you caught that inane comment from one of the women about Dr. Jeff's wife, oops I mean daughter. I felt bad for Dr. Jeff when he was trying to ride the bike though. Poor guy...
8 of 23 | Posted by volcat | Posted on November 2, 2005 6:20 PM
I am so embarrassed that I actually got the Apprentice cake reference.
I've been saying for weeks that Andrea's eyebrows freak the crap out of me. They looked even freakier in the pool. Yikes.
9 of 23 | Posted by Laurie | Posted on November 2, 2005 9:58 PM
The best part of this show is that Matt is the ultimate villain. In two episodes he pulls out a steel chairs and bashes everyone over the head. OH, the humanity.
10 of 23 | Posted by evan | Posted on November 3, 2005 4:52 AM
The best...
" Funny, that's not what Carson K. told me last week when we were shopping for sleeves to jooje."... and that you know of 'joojing'...pathetic? Perhaps. But hilarious none the less!
11 of 23 | Posted by megan | Posted on November 3, 2005 6:03 AM
There goes a manta-ray. Awesome B-52's reference and recap. Matt cries at the drop of a hat.
12 of 23 | Posted by SaveFerris | Posted on November 3, 2005 7:21 AM
I wish they made Matt chop his hair-Its so ugly.
13 of 23 | Posted by Britt | Posted on November 3, 2005 7:23 AM
Another dramatic change at the end of the show. Matt actually looks so much younger and pretty darn cute. I would have never guessed it by seeing him on day one. My favorite part of the show is when they update the progress of the eliminated contestant. These past two weeks have been incredible with Pete and Matt!
14 of 23 | Posted by buckums | Posted on November 3, 2005 9:49 AM
Does anyone know if Andrea's eyebrows are tattooed on or maybe she uses a stencil to spray paint them on every day. They can't be natural, please God no! As for Matt, I swear he looks like he's about to go postal. The man and Andrea's eye brows freak me out but not as bad as Dr. Jeff's vagina ankle. Loved the tampon throwing comments. Has anyone noticed at the weigh-in-elimination your not the biggest loser part that Matt is most always holding a piece of paper in his right hand? Does anyone know why? Maybe the list of what order to kill people in keeps changing??? I don't know. - Awesome recap as always.
15 of 23 | Posted by Melisa | Posted on November 3, 2005 10:28 AM
The problem with a show that measures success by weight lost each week is that at some point, a person who is working out a lot and finally getting fit is going to start building more muscle and their numbers will even out. This could be starting to happen to Suzie and Seth--they certainly still have weight to lose but they have probably gotten low enough and started toning up enough that 2 or 3 pounds a week is the most they should lose.
16 of 23 | Posted by callygirl | Posted on November 3, 2005 11:11 AM
Oh yeah, I forgot to answer Melisa's question (post 15.) Early on, Matt explained that his sister wrote him a letter telling him how proud she is of him and that it's inspiring to see him take control to change. He holds it for inspiration.
The list of people to kill is a much better story.
17 of 23 | Posted by callygirl | Posted on November 3, 2005 11:13 AM
Dr. Jeff didn't say Andrea's "pawn" remark upset him. I just watched the tape....
18 of 23 | Posted by Hayley | Posted on November 3, 2005 12:16 PM
callygirl: Thanks, it was starting to bother me. I would notice it week after week. I can let go of it now.
19 of 23 | Posted by Melisa | Posted on November 3, 2005 1:31 PM
Why can't we just have you be the villian C-Godd? I mean you have a freekin nice view and you make fun of fatty fat fat fats. Jerk! I hate you, you ... you villian!
PS You make funny good.
20 of 23 | Posted by Corky | Posted on November 3, 2005 4:00 PM
matt won me over when he coasted back down the hill to pick up shannon and her daughter so they could talk. what a guy. however, he clearly should have lept from the bike halfway up the hill and let gravity unleash an ugly deed. why choose making her happy over keeping your friend around - matt? bad call man! or was it...? !!great reading copygodd - thanks again!!
21 of 23 | Posted by fatty fats fat | Posted on November 10, 2005 12:23 PM
I have watched all these shows. I am not fat infact I am not even a teen yet so... yah. I think that Suzy should win... she deserves it.
22 of 23 | Posted by Taylor | Posted on November 22, 2005 6:08 PM
Dear Matt, Seth,and Suzy,
I love the show you are on and Suzy I like what you did to Matt's hair.
23 of 23 | Posted by Tory Ann Lavery | Posted on November 22, 2005 6:13 PM