Rebecca gets a call from Justin, where she has to explain that she's far too busy with the party and everything, and that she has to cancel whatever their plans were for the night. We have to assume that he doesn't take it well, given that they apparently couldn't get Dave Annable to record his side of the conversation. Anyway, Rebecca wants to get a room at the party hotel and Holly gives her the next day off.
Senator Ranch. Kevin and Robert are getting ready to go hunting, and they discuss that there's a second guy coming that they have to impress, besides Gordon Alexander. I have to wonder how Robert thinks bringing his gay Democrat brother is going to impress these uber-Republicans, no matter what his job title is. Kitty comes in for her five seconds of screen time (she's going to a photoshoot) and fondles one of the shotguns, which turns Robert on and grosses Kevin out. I do like that B&S isn't afraid to push its star to the sidelines, when there's no real purpose for her in the episode. Even though Calista Flockhart does drunk exceptionally well.
Walker Manor, where Sarah immediately starts dooming and glooming all over Nora about the stupid conference. Nora tries to prepare Sarah for what she's about to see on her daughter, calling it "more mature" than what she usually wears. Sarah's not really paying attention, until Paige comes out wearing a ridiculous red-sequined mini-dress. She looks like Hannah Montana, who is certainly not ten years old. Nora tells her she looks cute, and Sarah looks like she's going to faint and tells her to go change. Paige takes this as well as you'd expect and gets all bratty and drama queen about it. And I also call bullshit on Nora thinking that this is "cute" - Paige looks like a little baby whore and no grandmother would want their granddaughter going out in that monstrosity. Plus, is this dance party a school function or is it just some kid's party? Why did Sarah even say she could go in the first place?
But, Mom, all the elementary kids are wearing these!
Anyway, after the commercials, Nora is defending her decision, recalling Sarah's rocker phase and Kitty's spandex phase. But you know, I bet they were in high school when those phases occurred, so whatever, Nora. Nora goes on and on about how Paige feels good and that's all that matters and Sarah just can't even believe what she's saying, rolling her eyes and shaking her head all over the place. And seriously - Justin can tell you that drugs make you feel good but they don't want her doing that, do they? They should have had Rebecca or Justin take her shopping, or maybe even Kevin, given that they're the only parenting novices I could buy this crap from, and even then, it's a stretch because for the most part, they all have common sense.
AA Meeting. Justin gets approached by a fairly cute girl, Chelsea, who says she's new and wants him to be her sponsor, despite, as Justin points out, that male-female sponsorships are frowned upon. She eventually talks him into it, though, promising that it's only temporary until she finds someone else. Eh, I hope they don't take the obvious route with this - Rebecca and Justin are braving near-incest issues (even though the show likes to forget that awkwardness sometimes) and I don't really want to see them break up just yet. Also, we already did the cheating thing with Tommy last year and I know all of us are trying to forget that whole mess.
Greenatopia HQ. Rebecca is helping Kyle and Sarah get stuff done for the party. Rebecca finds The Dress and tries to get Sarah to think it's cute, recalling how her mother used to let her dress up as Madonna and raid her closet. Sarah points out that she doesn't need parenting advice from Holly, instead of the more valid point that Rebecca was dressing up in her mother's closet, not at some shady "dance party." She leaves to go return the dress and get a new one, and Kyle briefly freaks out about her untimely freaking out, but she ignores him and leaves anyway. Rebecca tells him to breathe through it and he is (rather adorably) charmed by her awesomeness, which we haven't seen in a while.
How fug is this dress?
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