Welcome back to another round of Celebrity Apprentice! Fresh off of last week's ego trip, the teams buckle down to participate for a minute in the service industry. Let's see how they do!
We begin in the VIP lounge with Brian McKnight telling us how proud he is that his team won. Translation: My concert was the best thing that ever happened to those salespeople and the viewing audience. I am the man. Melissa Rivers walks in after narrowly escaping termination and sings her sad song again about being personally attacked. She says that the Boardroom is so terrible that she's all the more motivated to beat the guys so she won't have to go back there.
Brian pays a visit to Youthville, USA to hand over his check. This is a charity that places children in foster homes. He sits down with the founders of the charity and tells them how wonderful he is for winning a challenge and gives them the $20,000. They are grateful and in return give Brian much flattery, telling him how smart and amazing he is. Good call, charity people. That's exactly the payment Brian McKnight was looking for.
Everyone heads over to Trump International Hotel to await instruction from his royal majesty, The Donald. Well guess which celebrity has been excused from today's festivities under the guise of "work." No, it's not Joan Rivers again. It's Khloe Kardashian! Who knew she was in such high demand? What is it, an appointment with the body sculptors that couldn't be postponed? An emergency party at Les Deux? The Donald tells the teams that this week their challenge will be to run a hotel, but it won't be Trump International, which is already in enough trouble. He introduces John Tisch, the head of Loews Hotels, who will be taking one for the proverbial team by allowing these yahoos to take over temporarily. John explains that the teams will be making up the rooms, bringing room service, acting as concierges, and their key objective is customer service and the guests' comments will decide the winner. Want to guess how many rooms each team will be in charge of? 100? No. 20? Wrong again. Five. Each team will have to take care of a whopping five hotel rooms during this challenge. I'm not saying it will be easy - especially if the guests know this is a challenge, but five? Come on, it's not even half of a floor. Heaven forbid these celebrities ever have to actually enter the work force. Now choose Project Mangers!
The girls choose T-Boz, who I keep forgetting is even here, and the guys decide to go with Dennis Rodman as a gesture of good sportsmanship. The Donald entreats Dennis to do a good job and stop making a mockery of his show. T-Boz looks worried.
The girls brainstorm and decide that Joan Rivers should be the concierge because she knows New York and has connections to get people into places. In the guys' car Dennis is saying that they should have bodyguards and drivers for all of their guests. Yes, I know that when I check in to the Sheraton, the first thing I do is look around to see who they've lined up as my bodyguard. Brian McKnight's enormous contribution is to suggest putting fruit in the rooms. Why don't you put YOURSELF in the room, Brian, and give everyone a nice concert? I'm sure there's no way that could miss. Dennis talks a big game, but doesn't really say much of anything. He does volunteer to be the "front man," which could mean any number of things. Clint Black asks him if he could at least stop swearing. Fat chance.
The first thing the teams get to do is learn how to clean rooms and as you can imagine, none of them are happy about it. They don't even have to clean up after themselves, so why on earth would they be interested in cleaning up after strangers? They actually take notes on how to make a bed. Next they learn how to welcome people to the Loews Hotel, or how to work at the front desk, and finally they have a crash course in room service. Naturally, when the hotel employee mentions condiments Dennis Rodman can't pass up the opportunity to say, "Condoms?" Oh how I absolutely adore 10-year-old humor. So clever.
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Comments (11)
RE: "The guys get a lady who announces that she would like tickets for Equus - seats on the stage, please. I looked into this and Equus is a play where Harry Potter appears naked and apparently has sex with a horse. Charming! Here is the show poster. Who's with me?"
Uh, what's the horse look like? Is the horse cute?
You know, that Sandy Bullock needs to get out the way cause I'm kidnapping Jesse James and he's gonna be my husband.
Oh, I'm in LOVE with that man.
As for that stupid skank Dennis Rodman. Boo Hoo Hoo. I don't have one stick of sympathy for him. I'll save my sympathy for the single mother raising two kids by herself or the inner city kid working and going to college at the same time or the senior citizens trying to pay for their prescriptions AND pay all their other bills.
Dennis Rodmand can kiss my ass. What I would like to do is find that shredder from FARGO, make Dennis a couple of Cosmos and then tell him, "Uh, I'm having a problem with this shredder. There's something wrong with the blade inside. Can you fix it?"
Thanks for the good recap Honey Gangsta!
1 of 11 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on April 3, 2009 12:59 PM
Why Mr. D, you do have a heart. I think I am in love. But we still have one little problem to settle before we enter into eternal bliss--Jesse James. I want him too. Oh how to solve this tangled web of love? Maybe
Dennis has the answer--oh wait he passed out with some Russian strippers. I've got it! Melissa will produce this unholy alliance. Hey it couldn't be any worse than Harry Potter and the horse, only this time no seats on the stage!
xoxo
2 of 11 | Posted by nyc cookie | Posted on April 3, 2009 4:49 PM
I've always had a thing for Jesse James. He seemed really sweet in those bits he used to do on the Leno show with Leno's gay intern. Sweet, with a dry sense of humor.
Sandra Bullock is a smart, smart woman. Instead of marrying umpteen times, she held out for a special guy like Jesse. I'm impressed.
Poor Dennis. I hope he takes care of his drinking problem and the rest of his life is more productive.
I'm pretty amazed at how well the guys did after such a shitty start. I wonder how many of those points came from Dennis's dinner date?
3 of 11 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on April 3, 2009 8:09 PM
Well, I learned about Billy Elliot from this episode. I was on the same page as Dennis thinking it was a person having a concert. While watching, I actually wondered why the guy was having trouble understanding Dennis's question. Good thing Google straightened me out.
4 of 11 | Posted by natpatben | Posted on April 3, 2009 9:35 PM
I was thinking Jesse James was a wet blanket of a personality until this episode. Now I think I'm in love!
Thanks for the great recap Honey Gangsta!
Oh and Mr. Dangerous? The guys that played the horses in Equus? You couldn't see their faces, but their bodies were T-A-S-T-Y.
5 of 11 | Posted by PottyMouth | Posted on April 4, 2009 3:50 AM
I never understood why Sandra Bullock married Jesse James. I never watched his show, but he seemed like a loser. I mean, his ex-wife is a porn star and he had that dirty biker vibe. But now I get it. I absolutely get it.
I think it is really obvious that Dennis Rodman has a lot of self image problems. He comes off as cocky and confident but you can tell that he drinks because he isn't sure of himself. I think if he stopped drinking, he would be a great person. And I also thought that it might be a good idea for him to visit Dr Drew.
(Disclaimer: No I don't think all bikers are dirty so no hate mail please)
6 of 11 | Posted by Snootchy Bootches | Posted on April 4, 2009 4:35 AM
I think it's pretty clear that Brandy doesn't have any real hair to bother herself with (do famous people even bother with real hair since extensions came along?)
And I read on another blog that the gays in room 702 were being difficult on purpose to get more air time - well it worked. They annoyed the snot outta me.
7 of 11 | Posted by TinkerbellAPixie | Posted on April 4, 2009 7:00 AM
Jesse James is the man. Did you see when Dennis said he drank when he was 14? It looked like he was going to cry a little.
I love love love him. My hubby says he speaks truth whenever he opens his mouth.
I say, he's adorable and I am so jealous of Sandra Bullock!
8 of 11 | Posted by scottywrangler | Posted on April 4, 2009 6:47 PM
I have long suspected that the producers manipulate the teams' scoring, and this episode was another confirmation. I mean, what sane person would even attempt to convince us that the guys REALLY got only 5 POINTS LESS that the ladies? I understand why the show does it, but have some respect for our intelligence, make the score at least resemble reallity!! If the women got 91, the guys had no right to get more than 40! And besides the guests of each team had no idea what the other team was offering. So their 'scoring' would be handicapped right off the bat. It must have been the hotel guy that really posted the scores for the woren, and then the producers just did not want to anihilate the guys team so arbitrarily gave them that improbable score of 86! What a joke.
9 of 11 | Posted by renata | Posted on April 4, 2009 9:55 PM
Did anyone catch Rodman on Leno? I saw a clip of it and he is an asswipe. (Rodman being the asswipe not Leno although I can't stand Leno.) Rodman couldn't even remember the names of his team. He ripped on Clint Black for being an idiot. He just proved again how horrible he is. Oh and in the boardroom he tried to defend his actions today by talking about his playing days. It was almost sad.
10 of 11 | Posted by Quean CeCe | Posted on April 5, 2009 6:36 AM
I feel bad for Rodman, to be exposed in such a public manner, despite him being such a public persona.
No one knows what demons he battles, regardless of his successful career and any money he still has. Addiction is a horrible hell to inhabit and yet is brought on by the person who suffers.
It seems, though, that his personality is such that until he hits a "rock bottom" he won't get help. Unfortunately, when you're as wealthy as Rodman that may never occur.
I truly appreciate Jesse James. I've never seen any of his shows, but he seems like someone I'd be comfortable hanging around with.
Entertaining recap. I've been enjoying many of the recaps on this site.
11 of 11 | Posted by Streaker | Posted on April 6, 2009 1:43 AM