Celebrity Rehab: I Really Don't Like These People

When we left off of Celebrity Rehab, we had just learned that no one cares about Chyna, including herself, and that Vikki has at least a mild case of retardation. Hopefully tonight we will endure less of Jeff bitching about wanting to leave.

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We pick up on day 14, after everyone's family has (I'm guessing) left. Jessica is the only one who's not out of bed, and she says she wants to be left alone. I don't get it. Why do people continuously think the rules don't apply to them? Also, it seems like they've been sober forever. I would hate to have to listen to Conaway's constant bitching and not be able to get a fix. I DO hate it. Give me a second to mix myself a little cocktail.

We see Jeff is up and around, and he says that he'd like to get to the point where he can move around without needing a shot for pain. That's funny, because I seem to remember him, about two days ago (their time) bitching that no one was around to give him a shot so he was getting his ass out of rehab.

Drew tells us that everyone is still recovering from Family Weekend, and Ricco appears to have taken it the worst after his girlfriend said she wasn't sure she could rely on him to care for their kid. Ricco tells us he's having a rough time and he wants to punch a wall, but he doesn't want to be that guy. You know that guy. The guy who drunk drives into a semi, then takes his girlfriend whom he thinks is dead and puts her in the drivers seat. You all know that guy.

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Who needs a babysitter?

They have group session that morning, and Drew tells us that people only have 4 days left of treatment. I actually get giddy at the thought of these people getting out so I no longer have to bitch to no one in particular about that stupid Kenicky. Brigitte says that in about two days she expects people to start to get emotional and possibly panicky about whether or not they should really be leaving. I have to admit, 18 days doesn't seem like a really sufficient period of time to sober me up. The court told me I had to go to rehab for 90 days. Psh, if I was a quitter maybe 90 days would work. Luckily for everyone but society, I'm no quitter.

Drew has everyone do a little exercise speaking to who they think will stay sober once out of rehab, and luckily Jeff gets to go first. He thinks Jaimee will stay sober, which, duh, it's fucking pot. Jaimee goes next, and she doesn't think that Jeff should stay with Vikki. Jeff realizes, or has realized, that Vikki is not good for him with his "Ya think?" response. Everyone shares a laugh, and it seems if there's one thing that can bring these people together, besides using, it's getting on the old Bash-Vikki train. Brigitte brought her ticket.

She says Vikki seems like she'd serve Jeff Jack and coke (not the soft drink) on a silver tray. We'll assume she meant silver platter. Well, sick of not getting all of the attention, Jessica speaks her mind. She thinks Jeff isn't sure sobriety will work for him, and she thinks Ricco will have issues because they still don't really know anything about him. Man, I wonder how the view is on her high horse. I bet you can see fields of whatever they use to make alcohol from it though.

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At least when I get pulled over I have the decency to offer the cop a bj. You, Ricco, are just rude.

Man she's a bitch. And it seems mostly undeserved from Ricco's side of things. It's like she's rooting against him. I mean, he's no great guy, unless you consider framing his thought to be dead girlfriend for a drunk accident great, which I happen to, but why root against him? It makes me feel better that she totally fell off the wagon. After recapping this show, I have virtually nothing invested in most of these people and could care less if they stay sober or use. It's quite refreshing.

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Comments (21)

addicted:

This recap was really unfun to read. I understand being snotty, and I certainly think that a lot of these people have difficult personalities but this wasn't even slightly funny and it came off as weirdly mean.

vango:

Obviously the blogger has had zero real-life experience with addicts and their behavior. The people on this show are exactly the same as the hundreds of addicts I've come across while working for years in treatment centers and the hundreds I've come across on the streets, and the same as myself at one time while making a living of smoking crack, snorting heroin, and gorging myself on any drug I could get my thieving, lying, entitled, egomaniacal, obsessive-compulsive grubby hands on. Addicts are big fucking self-centered babies, they ALL think the rules don't apply to them and they are all liars. It seems like this particular group of addicts are doing drunken cartwheels in this bloggers head. Such resentment.. it's not like they're running around with fucking Dorothy Hamill bobs in 2008.

Tigermilk:

A little surly this week Treading?...withdrawl perhaps?

A little harsh saying you don't give a f--k about these people staying sober. I hope they all do.

Jessica is an immature brat and she has a lot of learning to do on her way to (hopefully) lifetime sobriety after she is done with her current rehab. Dr. Drew is reportedly treating her right now, so I see he feels the same way about getting her off her mother's path to early death.

I also read in People magazine that Seth is in sober living and I'm glad he made that choice. But this episode really revealed a nasty side to him than we've seen thus far.

Oh, and addiction to pot is a perfectly valid addiction. Look it up.

vango:

I meant to add, before the Dorothy Hamill quip, that addicts are simply sick and need help. Most addicts I've known at heart are some of the kindest, sensitive, creative, wonderful people on the planet. With proper care and compassion they all have the ability to be amazing , productive members of society. The blogger comes across as a nasty, closed-minded, insensitive, and mostly ignorant creep. Way to go, Dorothy.

Tigermilk:

Hey Vango, you mention you have worked with addicts in treatment centers, how accurately do you think this show portrays rehab? I find it quite insightful and really feel differently about addicts and what they go through to get sober. I'm just curious what someone who has been on the inside thinks of the show.

vango:

I meant to add that addicts are sick, and addict behavior is certainly ugly. BUT, most addicts I've known are, at heart, some of the most sensitive, creative, smartest, gifted people in the world. Really wonderful people... unfortunately, equipped with a deadly personality glitch that needs to be constantly kept in check.

vango:

agh, I thought my other post didn't post so I tried to retype it and now they're both there. Well, I guess they are both applicable.

Tigermilk: Honestly, the guys on the show are babied quite a bit more than the treatment centers I've been in or worked in. Mainly, I think, for the reason that they're trying to complete a series without having them all duck out prematurely. And all of them are seriously itching to leave much of the time. In a true treatment environment I would think they would have been called out and confronted more about their manipulative and obviously dope-fiend behaviors. They seemed to have all gotten many passes on obvious bullshit. But then again, most of treatment is group therapy, and I'm talking up to 8 hours a day, plus 12 step meetings..there was very little of that shown so I don't know what really went on. Those groups are the heart of the treatment program, not so much the food fights and other crap. The problem with this show is what I stated earlier... they need these celebs to stay for the sake of the show... so they are babied, which is obviously detrimental to an addict that wants nothing more than to be babied. In fact, many of the treatment centers I've been exposed to will do just the opposite and make things very uncomfortable for the patients, since learning to cope with life on life's terms and coping with discomfort is a primary factor in why addicts use. They are often too sensitive for and can't handle things not going their way, so they run and hide in their addiction. It's crucial in recovery that the addict learns how to cope through adversity. Also, to bring a group of newbie addicts into a restaurant/bar such as they did was ridiculous, and I'm amazed Drew allowed that.

Bottom line, I don't think tv rehab is going to help any of them, the two don't mix.

VegasDarling:

I am so glad someone hates Jessica as much as I do. She obviously has the hots for Ricco, so she keeps calling him out and being a bitch to get his attention. Dumbass.

VegasDarling:

By the way, awesome recap. The comments remind me of that Mitch Hedberg joke - "Alcoholism is the only disease you get yelled at for."

I have sympathy for these people, but so much more empathy for people with heart disease and cancer, thank you very much.

VegasDarling:

By the way, awesome recap. The comments remind me of that Mitch Hedberg joke - "Alcoholism is the only disease you get yelled at for."

It's hard to have sympathy for these people when they are 4 year-olds with cancer in the world.

Sweetleaf:

Then Jaimee tells Ricco it was kind of childish to do that. But singing 99 bottles of beer on the wall is totally not childish in the least. And fuck you if you think so. I need to get high.


LOL!

Loved the screen caps!

jenna:

Very Disappointed!

There are only two types of people who can write a great recap:

1) someone who absolutely loves the show

2) someone who loves/hates the show at the same time...it's thier guilty pleasure

This recap (terrible!) is a perfect example of a writer who doesn't fit either type.


jenna:

This writer needs a thorough education on addiction. Which is surprising because everyone has been touched by addiction in someway - friend, family, the neighbor down the street, etc.

WEED can be an addiction! It is not real common to be the only DOC (drug of choice) usually someone is abusing other substances as well.

Also, I know Ricco did a terrible thing when he put his girlfriend in the drivers seat - but addicts do terrible things!

I do wish he felt some sorrow over what he did and I think the more he gets into his recovery those feelings will come. Sometimes, especially in the beginning of recovery, you are still numb. He is going to have to face many many bad actions of his past and that can overload a person when they are also dealing with detoxing from drugs. Right now he seems to be focusing on the issues with his baby and that's a start.

hollabackboy:

This recap was overly harsh. And it throws me for a loop, cause these recaps aren't usually that bad.

On the surface, it may seem like just a "reality show", but there really are serious issues at hand. These people could die. Reading the writer saying he doesn't care about their recovery, especially Jessica, made me cringe. Like jenna said, everyone has been affected by addiction. I have an aunt who's been on and off cocaine for several years.

Some lines just really shouldn't be crossed. I'm sure there's a way to recap this show, in a more kind of sarcastic way, without being so mean.

hollabackboy:

And by the way, pot IS an addiction, not to mention a gateway drug. I think everyone learned that in school. It can be just as hard to quit as drugs and alcohol, if not more, since most people just see it as very recreational.

Honestly, treadingonme, if you don't like this show so much, don't recap the upcoming last episode.

Sandisky:

I have to agree with addicted. Recappers who don't enjoy the show - evidently - don't write enjoyable recaps. Also, I like these people - all but Daniel - and am rooting for them.

One other thing - anyone who thinks it's "obvious" that Jessica has the hots for Ricco and is therefore picking on him is not nearly as perceptive as they think they are. If the food fight didn't make it obvious what mutual flirting society was going on during this show's filming, watch the deleted scenes at VH1. It ain't Ricco she had the hots for. She calls Ricco out on his bullshit for the same reason Bob called her out on hers. Bob doesn't have the hots for her and she doesn't have the hots for Ricco.

jenna:

I am in total agreement with everyone here.

I'd like to give the writer the chance to explain = everyone's told a bad joke that bombed. So if it's just a case of "I didn't realize how this sounded" then go for it on the last episode.

But if that's your way then please get someone else to write. You know this episode is going to be a good one, so we need a writer who really gets the show.

MichyPR:

I for one liked the recap, I specially like that it's always posted soon after the episode airs. I can understand the writer getting frustrated at some of the "celebrities" and maybe some of the comments might be considered harsh by some people but whatevs, it's the writer's opinion.

jellybean:

I disagree with everyone; I liked the recap. I come to 'gasm for unapologetic snark, so keep it coming.

yeahkate:

This recap was terrible. If you're going to be so cranky about this show, you should at least try to be funny about it.

chelle:

It was my impression that these people aren't supposed to be "likable" ... thus showing the harsh reality of addiction. We may sympathize, but I don't know if we're supposed to necessarily like them ... just a thought.

I was enjoying the suggestions of how this show could be a drinking game in the recaps back, I say, carry on! :)

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