I was really having trouble finding the motivation to write the recap for this episode of Celebrity Rehab, but I thought since I'm coming off of a four day bender, it may be about as good a time as any to judge these poor saps who are slaves to their addictions. Suckers. So let's check out what happened this week as I try to piece together the past four days.
Whatchoo lookin at, bitch?
We open on the morning of day 19, graduation day, and it's pretty early in the morning (7:30). Early for addicts, or possibly late, depending on how much or how well you can party. Drew tells us that right now everyone is struggling with their decisions to go to sober living. These people are (or should be) rich (except for Jessica probably), yet they would pretty much flat out refuse to go to sober living if they had to 'work' to pay the bills, so they're getting coddled even in the fact that they get three free months of sober living (during which most will probably decide to leave because these people are all quitters. Well, except for the drugs and alcohol part, obviously).
Oh, the delicious irony of this scene. Mary tells us that she's about 80% sure she wants to go to sober living, and Jessica wants to go and so does Jaimee. But we heard last week that Jaimee doesn't think she needs to go, and Jessica is really on the fence about the whole thing. And we know how impressionable Mary is, so it's pretty obvious that 80% means absolutely bullshit. Poor Mary. Grow a pair. Metaphorically, please.
Will there be a camera crew there?
A little while later everyone is just sitting around, because there's not much else to do in rehab. Ricco says they should place bets on who actually stays in sober living, and Seth says he'll be staying. That's interesting because, also last week, he said he wasn't sure it was something he could commit to. Brigitte says she'd like to stay, like it's out of her control or something. She's in America while her kids are in another country, so I don't really think she could use that as an excuse. Sasha, the chief nurse, asks if they're betting so that pretty much puts the kibosh on that. Way to be a buzzkill Sasha.
Ricco tells us that Drew always says to put yourself before anyone else during your sobriety, but Ricco says that his family is first. Well, there's getting high, and then there's the family. But Ricco says that getting/staying sober is entirely for his family and is what's motivating him to go to sober living.
We then see a little bit of an extended cut of Seth's speech last week where he says he's not sure he's ready for sober living. So VH1 is doing a great job selectively piecing things together here. Later we see Jessica talking to Bob and Shelly and she asks how many bedrooms are in the sober living house. It's a two-bedroom apartment and there are two beds in each room, and if Mary, Jaimee and Jessica all go, there will be one extra room.
Bob thinks Chyna should go with them. Chyna blankly nods her head and says alright. She could not be more ambivalent about this whole thing. Also, I don't really think it's a good idea to keep those three together (even though they all may end up not going). But I guess the rehab people think it's more important that they have each other to lean on rather than put them with strangers. Bah.
I'd be in sober living if I just went home because I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM, PEOPLE!
Ugh, then we see an extended cut of Jaimee's speech last week where she said she wasn't sure about sober living. She goes to ask Seth a question about the place and whether or not they let you leave, because she's got all kinds of places to be. Seth says that the first two weeks will be rough and more similar to rehab while they develop trust. Jaimee says ok and walks away, and I really don't see any way that she goes. Actually I would be surprised to see just about anyone go besides Ricco.
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Comments (7)
This episode was about 50% filler, particulary the flashbacks of events we had seen 20 MINUTES AGO. And they played Mary telling Dr. Drew to let her finish...doctor, a total of 5 times. Other than that, I felt a bit uneasy when the show ended.
Seth is still in sober living apparently, and I do not think Mary will stay sober especially because she still performs feature shows at strip clubs which is a really risky environment for her.
I feel the most confident about Brigitte staying sober though, and I think Chyna choosing counseling was a good choice for her.
1 of 7 | Posted by Tigermilk | Posted on March 9, 2008 9:37 PM
Chyna actually looked pretty in that screenshot. She hasn't been looking as mannish as she used to.
2 of 7 | Posted by michyPR | Posted on March 10, 2008 3:02 AM
There's a reunion episode for this show??? I guess I shouldn't be surprised by that, since it's VH1. Poor Treading...
3 of 7 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on March 10, 2008 4:20 AM
About a month ago on TMZ, they had an article about Seth. Right in front of one of the TMZ papparazzi camera guys, a car ran a red light and crashed into the car that was carrying Seth and his bandmates. Everyone was fine, but the car wasn't operational. Seth actually asked the papparazzi if he could give him a ride back to his rehab house. Looks like he is still in sober living. Good for him.
4 of 7 | Posted by snootchy bootches | Posted on March 10, 2008 5:59 AM
I can't believe they let Jaimee in for smoking pot. It's not like she's a headliner that can really draw in the crowds, VH1. Personally, I think she agreed to do this show for some screen time, since no one really knows who she is. She's got a lot of nerve to be such a wench to everybody. Too bad Ricco didn't dump her in the drink instead.
I wonder how long Jessica ends up staying in sober living, since she ended up in jail about 3 months ago. Time will tell.
5 of 7 | Posted by TheGreatAndPowerfulShaz | Posted on March 10, 2008 2:31 PM
Around when the second or third ep of Rehab aired, I was listening to my local radio station on the way to work. Before they went to break, they teased a phone call from Seth and said they were going to ask him about being on the show.
When they came back from the break, they said they couldn't do the interview b.c Seth was "so incoherent" they had to end the call.
Sad -- I thought he might make it. But I've known addicts, and I've seen how hard it is to kick.
6 of 7 | Posted by bonita | Posted on March 10, 2008 5:13 PM
What will you be recapping next, treading? Thanks for all the entertaining snark :)
7 of 7 | Posted by chelle | Posted on March 11, 2008 5:24 PM