Brandi M. reminds Brandi C. about the things they learned, especially in lieu of the PSA debacle on last week's episode. Brandi C. responds..."Muummggghhfff Muufgmftt ." And then she proceeds to slobber all over Mr. Business degree's lapel. Ah. class. Brandi M. talks about how she's changed a lot on the show, and I like that...even though now she's being a little fucking preachy about it. All the skanks hop back aboard the skank mobile and they meander on home to their abode. But wait, don't forget Brandi C, who when drunk, doubles as a Veloca Raptor.
Watch out- they're smart enough to work door handles.
All of a sudden, Heather is also drunk as a skunk. Maybe she just caught wind of Brandi C's stink. Of course, bitchy, evil Lacey decides that she's going to go a-scheming and make some DRAMA. Lacey pulls our darling Brandi C away from her food, water and trashbag to recall a fond memory of when Heather screamed in Brandi C.'s face. Brandi C's face gets all crinkled and she answers something indecipherable that I think was ...."scrweemging at me yahou ex boyfrienffh facelift cupcake..." So they both go to yell in Heather's drunk, tranny face. Awesome idea.
So Lacey and Brandi C. go scream at Heather while the other girls...make faces?
Kirsti Jo, you can take the fat suit off now...
Kristi Jo looks sorta like Tim Curry in Rocky Horror Picture show, btw. Destiney starts screaming back at all the screaming (the girls haven't had the commandment on communication, apparently) Oh, then wanna know what? Wanna know what? Brandi C. spits what looks like dual business degree semen all over Destiney's face! Wohooo! Finally some spittle flinging!
Juzzum-a-go go.
Then Destiney asks politely again for the skank bitches to please fucking leave the motherfucking room.
Pwetty please?
Finally, Lacey decides to get out, and brings her drunk friend with her. And, in this picture, I'm not sure if the shit under Brandi C's belly button is pubic hair or a weird tattoo.
My vote is weird pubies...
Then Heather pukes a little bit and has an asthma attack. It's just like eighth grade, only with more thong and butt cleavage ( I went to private school). Then evil Lacey and Brandi C. make out!!!!!
Boobies n' Barf!
Just kidding just kidding just kidding. This is just a still of Brandi C. getting pawed at, evilly, by Lacey. Destiney starts crying because she has evil infected spit-sperm in her contact, and Heather gets pissed about the spittle and confronts Lacey. Lacey, of course, plays it cool...
...as an evil cucumber.
Then they squabble about who is an A list celebrity. Okay, folks, let's play this multiple choice:
Question: Who's an A list celebrity?
A. Inna
B. Heather's penis
C. Flipit
D. A & B
E. A can of string beans
Answer: C, Flipit! Wanna know why? Because he runs the site that makes these bitches celebrities. Heather's penis was a close second, though.
Then Heather calls her mom. Dude- now Heather looks like a homeless tranny in a phone booth designed for an eighth grade girl.
Momma! I'm out of skittles! (Wheeze)
Jessica goody two shoes brings Homeless Man-Heather some pizza, and then Lacey flies by on her broomstick and says "now you know how Brandi feels, bitch!"" Wow, to the point. Heather follows her and throws her pizza at Lacey!
Charm School: A Waste of Perfectly Good Pizza
Heather freaks out some more, wants to quit charm school, pukes in a bag, talks about math and science, pukes in a bag, climbs a fire pole, reads Pride and Prejudice, pukes in a bag and then freaks out some more. In the morning, Lacey does a little evil songwriting....
Kumbaya, Bret Michaels, Kumbaya....
...And she feels satisfied. God I hate that bitch. Brandi C. wakes up and don't remember shit. But- not to worry- Jessica two shoes fills her in and tells Brandi C. that Lacey manipulated the spit outta her mouth and into Destiney's eye. At least Brandi C. is horrified that she camelized good 'ol Destiney.
So Brandi C. sucks it up and apologizes to Destiney, in a rare moment of humanization in all of the Charm School episodes.
BO-RING!
I was sorta hoping Brandi C. would spit again on Destiney, or at least give her a little smooch.
And then came elimination....
but wait- not before another cry session in Sharon's office. Wahhh! Heather tells Sharon that she threw a plate o' pizza at Lacey. Well, against a wall. In heather's defense, it was a very bad wall. Bad wall! (wheeze barf wheeze)....
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Comments (5)
This show has become a sitcom parody of a reality show. Maybe it's because of the recurring cast of characters -- some of these girls have been on three shows this year already, something like that?
So they've all become fictional, and as in all fiction, it doesn't really matter what happens to any of them. Who stays, who goes, pff! They might as well spit on each other.
And yeah, some of those tattoos are really nasty. Like this pubic hair tattoo trend --don't these women realize that after the third kid, their abdominals will be exploded, their bellies are going to sag down to their knees, taking those tattoos with them? Ick.
And what's with this Riki guy and his arms? I mean, was this his (futile) attempt to somehow appear to be cool? Is he really going to look at that mess in 20 years and be pleased with himself?
Ick. Ick. Ick. That's my mantra while watching this show. Which of course I watch. Of course.
1 of 5 | Posted by itchy | Posted on December 2, 2008 10:25 PM
Itchy, I think it's about 20 years too late for Rikki to worry about his future.
2 of 5 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on December 3, 2008 5:08 AM
Of course I watch too. Isn't this train wreck a total and complete guilty pleasure?
3 of 5 | Posted by Clair | Posted on December 3, 2008 8:50 AM
Clair, I would agree with you, if Megan were still there... ever since she left (WAY too SOON!), the show has just been complete dullsville... unlike FOL Charm School, with each episode escalating to a most brilliant smack down of Bootz.
4 of 5 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on December 3, 2008 11:29 AM
If you love watching skanks in action, check out Rehab:Party at the Hard Rock, on Tru TV, Tuesdays 10p. I'm guessing this show won't be recapped because it is "actuality" and not "reality"? Anyway, it's fun to see these train wrecks in their natural habitat.
Brandi M. for the win!
5 of 5 | Posted by shantigal | Posted on December 3, 2008 11:56 AM