I am running out of hangover inspired headlines for these Newsgasm digests, but B-side should be back next week, so we'll just have to get through this together:

• The next time Simon Cowell hates on one of your favorite American Idol contestants, just remember what he looks like with his shirt off. Just make sure you have a paper bag close by. [Read More]
• Gerald Ford died! (That's an exclamation point of sorrow) But we remember a simpler time when he was alive and it was Chevy Chase making fun of him all the time. [Read More]
• Did we mention that Gerald Ford died at the senseless age of 93? Dana Carvey brings you the news. [Read More]
• Replace Mr. Rogers? Blasphemy! [Read More]
• GSN has a game where you can execute Saddam yourself online. In other news, Donald Rumsfeld just got a new laptop. [Read More]
• Does Carson Daly or Dick Clark throw the best New Year's bash? We weigh the options. [Read More]
• She's the one that we love. Woo hoo hoo honey. Olivia Newton John might make a cameo on the new Grease reality show on NBC. [Read More]
• And finally, for those of you that are looking to huddle up in your living room with some cider and a string of bad movies or sappy prime time soap operas, we have a list of New Year's marathons available to you through the wonders of cable television. [Read More]