He half heartedly tries to get Daisy's attention but it doesn't last very long and the two lovebirds head inside to suck face. She gets up to change into more trashy lingerie, sticks a condom down her cleavage, and they toast each other's luck for having people like you and me pay attention to their sorry asses.
And Peepers decides to camp out on her doorstep so he can catch her post-coitus and profess his undying non-love to her. The chair he picked for his pathetic vigil isn't too comfortable so he heads off to grab some pillows and a blanket. He passes Flex and TT and they rib him a little but he's a man on a mission. Maybe he doesn't understand boundaries. Maybe (definitely) he grew up inappropriately attatched to his momma. Either way, he looks pathetic.
He sprawls out on the floor and has to listen to their giggles and wiggles, 12's True Religion jeans rubbing against his wallet chain and the squeeky sound of silicone straining against a cheap bodice. God knows it bothered him when his parents went at it and heterosexual sex still gives him the willies so he calls it a night and heads back to his bunk. He curls up with his Curious George stuffed animal, his only friend now that TT's love is gone. I weep.
Not really, but I'm about to.
The next morning, 12 Pack is bursting with confidence since he got to give the dog a bone and (bonus) she never once made fun of his shrivelled up steroid balls! Yay, you! Now, get ready to have those shrivelled up balls crawl back up into your body cavity bacause Riki has a trick up his sleeve. And I do mean trick.
Ding Dong! There's someone at the door, and on this show anything involving phones or doorbells is a harbinger of doom. It turns out that Riki Fonzarelli has been getting emails from London. Wow, his park bench must be close to the library becuase I'm pretty sure that there are no electrical outlets or WiFi at L.A.'s Metro Parks. So, all of you that guessed London as our blast from Daisy's past get a gold star, or another chance to throw up right along with yours truly. Thankfully, there's a new product for that.
These emails that Riki has been receiving consist of London having a change of heart and professing that he still has feelings for Daisy. He left out the part where he spent all of the pawnshop money and he needs a new guitar to sell. He also ran out of couches to surf and food to eat but maybe, just maybe, if he treats Flex really, really well, he might make him some Ramen noodles.
What I'm hoping for is that he fucks this up and Flex beats him to within an inch of his life, but first Riki takes him up to Daisy's room. He knocks on the door and Daisy asks, "What's the password?" Poor, long suffering Riki doesn't understand what she said. He thought that she said, "What's up, has-been?" Too cute. Self depricating and funny? When is this guy not likeable? You're a stellar guy, Riki. I see it even if Daisy doesn't, as do a bunch of you. Too bad that hanging out with her is sapping you intelligence, as we will find out later.
He tells Daisy that he has someone who wants to speak to her and she's understandably confused. Talk? Put letters together to make words that form sentences? With grammar and syntax? Nooooo!!!!! And then in walks London.
Riki leaves them alone and Daisy is in a state of flustered shock. She actually looks pretty. I guess that her alkie super crush washes away the strange rubbery look her features take on when she's acting for the cameras. Or the botox is wearing off, don't care, whatever it is, it's an improvement.
They sit down to talk so let the bullshit begin! He stammers out some sort of apology amounting to him patting himself on the back for not being fake. He says that it stopped being a game for him when his feeeeelings got involved, that and copious amounts of Jose Cuervo. He seems........sober.
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Comments (10)
I think Daisy and London ought to go on a double date with Jillian and Ed.
1 of 10 | Posted by itchy | Posted on July 1, 2009 4:31 PM
Uuhhhhhh, wadda ya mean what are you going to do?!?! Find another show immediately dammit!!!!
Twunty, you crack me up every week. I love your take on these idiots.
I have to say I was sorry to see Mr Peepers go - it's like seeing a beloved pet die. Without the beloved part. I bet he's already built a shrine to TT in his basement.
LOVED the gif of her falling on her ass!! I could watch it over and over and over again. And I'm sure I will.
SWAK, PottyMouth
2 of 10 | Posted by PottyMouth | Posted on July 2, 2009 4:16 AM
Yes Twunty, you WILL find another show STAT to recap. What would we do without you? I agree with Potty. I had become more interested in following Peepers & TT's relationship than Dazey's. I'll miss the little monkey.
OK, London will end up winning, he will break her heart, bingo, bango, Dazey of Love II. That could be said about any one of these losers.
Who hasn't fallen for the hottie loser manipulator once or twice, maybe even thrice, ahem, but London? They're really asking a lot of us to believe that one.
Thanks Twunty, for another great one.
3 of 10 | Posted by shantigal | Posted on July 2, 2009 11:23 AM
I must say, this show has been much more entertaining than I expected. And the recaps are legen - wait for it - dary!
I'm glad that little wuss is gone, I couldn't stand to look at him any longer. I just feel a mix of pity and disdain for him. He needs a good psychiatrist, stat.
What does Daisy find hot about London? He's a nothing. In spite of myself, I kind of like Daisy - I think she's a nice person and she can look really pretty at times (I agree Twunty).
4 of 10 | Posted by spacevenus | Posted on July 2, 2009 11:28 AM
Bubbles from Charm School and Peepers should have a baby.
5 of 10 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on July 2, 2009 12:29 PM
Beebles? Puppers?
I'm really enjoying 12 Pack this season. Maybe it's because he reminds me of a Rock'em Sock'em Robot
And I keep wondering what drug he's been taking and whether there's any left over for me.
6 of 10 | Posted by itchy | Posted on July 2, 2009 1:20 PM
It has been a long time since I have laughed as hard as I did when you called Peepers an anorexic crip!!
And Slutty_Whore - your comment was priceless.
7 of 10 | Posted by ohionancy | Posted on July 2, 2009 2:05 PM
I think the difference between our hottie losers and hers, shantigal, is that ours were HOT.
We may criticize Jillian the Bachelorette for her bad taste in men (Wes), but she pales by comparison to this little gal. At least pick TT--he's a skinny, no-talent, but I think he is closer to being a decent guy.
If you're going to get your heart broken, it should be by 12-Pack or Flex! Preferably Flex, cuz he still has a package.
8 of 10 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on July 2, 2009 3:50 PM
Just wanted to say Twunty, great job, I know what a bitch it is getting through shows like this (remember "Double Shudder At Love"?) so kudos to you for doing a great job!
love, J-Mo :)
9 of 10 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on July 6, 2009 2:01 PM
I've got a good idea of what show you should recap next: Megan wants a millionaire. I almost pissed my pissed when I saw the comercial. I love to hate that ho and I hope they all knock her ass down a peg or two.
10 of 10 | Posted by cansnuts | Posted on July 9, 2009 9:01 AM