Supposedly, we are losing two guys this week, SUPPOSEDLY. Getting rid of three would be fine with me but then what would I do with myself next week?
Nasty.
The truth is that we're going to have to wait two weeks again because VH1 is airing a clip show next week since they didn't get as many episodes out of this trainwreck what with all the guys that took it upon themselves to skedaddle.
As we all know, one of the skedaddlers is back and he's in the kitchen getting ragged on by 12 and Flex. TT isn't saying a word, no doubt because he can't believe that he's made it this far and doen't want to mess it up. Or he's just drunk again, or it just sunk in that his little buddy is gone.
12 and Flex want JOSHUA LEE, REAL PERSON, to prove how badly he wants to be there by doing a shot of Tabasco, which he promptly does. What a man. Ha. I knew a guy in college that would down entire bottles of Dave's Insanity without blinking an eye or drinking water afterwards. So snort a line of Wasabi powder or something, then we'll talk, big guy.
It's drunks around the fire pit time again and Daisy's been hitting the Ripple already because she comes out meowing. I think I heard her do a bird call as well, some kind of Booby no doubt, the not-so-rare Pink Crested Yellow Weaved Booby of Sunset Strip, I think, and who will she shine her bright light of attention on tonight? It's TT!
But not that wasted. It's not like she actually makes out with the guy, she only allows him to touch her cheek with his Nicole Kidman pre-surgical enhancement sized lips. I doubt that she even felt it.
London is sitting right next to them, watching and waiting his turn like a good little prodigal douchebag, then letting her know that he needs, he wants, he must have some one-on-one time with his future sugar mama. They tumble onto the grass, mumbling their barely articulated feelings to one another, a merry-go-round of love proving and spit swapping.
TT is not going to be pushed aside so easily, oh no, he hast picked two beautiful flowers from yonder hillside for our lady faire, and lost his magic ring in the process! He bemoans his tragic situation to the other two knights and they promise to form a fellowship in the morn' and trace the path of his precious to the bitter end.
In other words, it's probably a five dollar freaking skull ring he bought off some street vendor in Venice Beach so get over it, you asshole.
It's safe to say that his stupid flower ploy didn't exactly move Daisy to stop massaging London's uvula nor does it keep her from asking London to eat TT's pathetic flora to "prove his love to her."
By the way, I think that I'm going to add that quote to the list of phrases that you will never ever hear come out of your Twunty's mouth. To say it is to admit defeat and I would have already been on the third guy after him by now, not that I'm a slut or anything so let's move on.
Flex says that he doesn't see any sparks flying around between the two of them and he's right in a way. How sexy is it to watch two people that are so drunk that all of Southern California is spinning around them, try to bob and weave their way to each other's mouth? About as sexy as watching Michael Jackson kiss Lisa Marie Presley, that's how.
TT observes the flower eating and stamen swapping and all 98 pounds of him are about to go off, and 98 pounds of angry hipster rocker is a really scary thing, I tell you! He smashes a guitar that he found hanging on the wall which is a good thing since it leaves less stuff for London to pawn later, and he throws eggs in the house, hitting one of the cameras and camera guys, I assume.
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Comments (12)
I just don't see what is attractive about London. His face is way too feminine for me.
I rewound the show a few times for the Kia fall. The show made it look like she was drunk and fell, but if you watch carefully, she is leaning to get something and then London bumps into her.
I totally agree about the shot of tabasco being no big deal. I know some Army Rangers who used to put tabasco in their eyes to help they stay awake on missions. Tell that douchebag to do that and I'll be impressed.
Anyway, thanks for another great recap!
1 of 12 | Posted by Snootchy Bootches | Posted on July 16, 2009 5:11 AM
Great recap. It's almost over! Hang in there.
The hot sauce didn't impress me either. My future wife Olivia Munn (from Attack of the Show) did something like ten shots of Tapatio, which is hotter than tabasco, one right after the other. London's a pussy.
I think I need to get my own show like this. TheMiki of love or whatever. Not to find love, because everyone knows that's not what these shows are for. I just know I have awful taste in women and tend to fall for the absolutely horrible pathological liars while all my friends tell me she's pure evil and to get the hell out while I still can. Maybe if I made my terrible decisions on TV and had Twunty recapping them I could figure out what's wrong with my selection process.
2 of 12 | Posted by themiki | Posted on July 16, 2009 6:16 AM
Ooh, I missed Flex's name calling when I actually watched the show. I kind of liked him for a while there, but now I'm for DavePack all the way.
3 of 12 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on July 16, 2009 12:06 PM
Snootchy Bootches, that's nothing. I WAS an Army Ranger, and on 48-hour sentry duty, I'd bring along a Pomeranian, slap it around, then let it bite my junk if I got tired.
We named the dog Snooze Alarm.
All the ex's were way less wax-museum creepifying than Daisy.
4 of 12 | Posted by NotWithoutMyTV | Posted on July 16, 2009 12:40 PM
I really can't see anyone but 12 Pack winning. No way I believe his ex's story about his shining goodness, and his sexual presentation is indeed suspect. BUT he's getting the 'good guy' edit for some reason, while the other two are getting the 'sleazy asshole' (London) and 'bigoted lunatic' (Flex) edits. He is the only logical choice at this point.
But on the other hand, the producers haven't minded showing Daisy as illogical in the extreme...so yeah, she's gonna pick London.
5 of 12 | Posted by spinal11 | Posted on July 16, 2009 12:48 PM
No, no, they're obviously grooming Davepack (excellent) for his own show.
So he'll be in the final two, get rejected, act all heartbroken, then get his own housefull of skanks.
And the world will continue to spin on its axis. Hooray!
I thought Gia was kind of cute. Well, better than Daisy. Well, okay, even Daisy Duck is better than Daisy.
6 of 12 | Posted by itchy | Posted on July 16, 2009 2:02 PM
The most entertaining part about the Kia fall is the guys' reactions: Rikki just sat there with a smug amused look on his face, Flex busted out laughing, and 12 sprung up to grab her-that pretty much says everything about who the guys are!!! haha
7 of 12 | Posted by Trister | Posted on July 16, 2009 9:20 PM
I think the bonus clips for this show are really essential for 'understanding' it.
For one thing, you can see that 12Pack (and Flex) aren't taking any of this seriously, they're just making a televions program.
The show definitely has a different feel to it from other similar shows -- the extra scenes give you the feeling that they've all become prisoners to the production process. None of them expects anything to happen from this, and they're all just acting when the camera's on.
On most of the other shows, the people seem to forget that the cameras are there.
8 of 12 | Posted by itchy | Posted on July 17, 2009 12:48 AM
Ok maybe someone can answer this for me. I've noticed on this and many shows in the "confessionals" they are always wearing the same clothes. Is this because confessionals are taped post-production? Do they have to wear the same clothes? Is it hard to not notice it? Because I notice it, and it leads me to believe they are shot in post, which also means they know the outcome of the show already. So why would anything surprise them??? Besides the fact that Daisy and all the guys seem to be reading off cue cards (if any of them can read)
9 of 12 | Posted by sheyanicole | Posted on July 17, 2009 6:33 AM
@sheyanicole....
Dude!!! I have always thought the same thing about those "interviews". I'm sure they are post and I believe the cast are probably shown clips and asked questions about how they felt about that particular incident. But then again if that's the case I see no good reason for them being all optimistic and sure of themselves in certain situations (which leads us all to know that things always go the opposite) unless the are being coached, just to keep us viewers in suspense.
I could give a crap if this show is fake but at least give us some out there stuff. I'm truly becoming desensitized to these reality based dating shows. I loved the Peepers/TT love story...but more should have been done. What about drug abuse?? Or domestic violence??? I mean, with all that testosterone in the house only TT was the one to pop his dried up chick in the mouf?
Give me something, VH1!
p.s. would totes watch I love Dave or 12 Pack,Drunk Love or Pack of Love or 12 Pack: Keg Stand of Love....
10 of 12 | Posted by uglycutie | Posted on July 17, 2009 2:56 PM
Yup, the confessionals are taped post-production using old footage, coaching from production and with less witty cast members, cue cards. The Bad Girls Club was funny because their extras would show cast members rehearsing their 'spontaneous' confessional lines.
11 of 12 | Posted by spinal11 | Posted on July 18, 2009 8:44 AM
I think Flex will win, atleast he should win now that 12 pack is out.
But did anyone else notice that London's "female friend" was on Paris Hilton's my BFF. I knew she looked familiar and then it hit me. I wonder if they even knew eachother before hand.
12 of 12 | Posted by MVelis | Posted on July 28, 2009 6:29 AM