This week on Damages, Glenn Close scares the crap out of everyone.
But in a much kinder and gentler way than usual.
We begin right where we left off, with Danny Purcell in the Car of Sadness and Secrets. Busty, of course, is riding shotgun. "Did you kill your wife?" Busty asks. I assume the show cut out the dialogue where they both awkwardly discuss how it's raining cats and dogs. You shouldn't jump right into accusations of spousal murder before warming up with a little weather small talk first - at least, that's how I was raised.
"I had nothing to do with this," Purcell says in a monotone. Busty asks if Christine Purcell found out about their affair, and we jump to a memory of Purcell and Christine arguing in their kitchen, both in their gala wear. I'm gonna take that as a "yes." But Purcell, reading my mind and spiting me, says "no." In Purcell's world, every day is Opposite Day. It helps me keep track of things, because I'm just going to go ahead and assume that he's lying about pretty much everything for the rest of the season.
"Someone leaked your toxicity report to Patty Hewes," Busty says. "I did," Purcell responds. Lie!! Oh wait, no, that's actually true. Damn.
"This is not what I had in mind when you suggested a 'quickie in the car.'"
Busty asks why and Purcell says there are certain things he can't tell her about for her own protection. Like his herpes outbreak. "You have got to tell me the truth," Busty presses. "Who is responsible for this?"
"Who do you think?" Purcell asks. As usual, his cryptic responses are utterly useless.
We cut to Tommy filling Patty in on Ultima National, the energy company that employs Busty, er, Claire Maddox. He points out a picture of Walter Kendrick, CEO. He looks like a nice grandfatherly figure to me - like the type of boss who keeps a bowl of Werther's on his desk and reads to the blind in his spare time. "Ultima National Resources is destroying the environment," Tommy says. That doesn't sound like Grandpa. "West Virginia. Acid rain from coal burning power plants." Grandpa??? "They've pushed mercury levels to 87 times the national average." Okay, we get it, Grandpa is Dr. Evil.
Tommy continues to expand on Ultima's evil agenda, and Patty gets a justice hard-on. She explains to Tommy that Purcell knows more about Ultima than he's letting on. She plans to get it out of him. This will not be pretty.
Tommy says he's on board, but wants Patty to come clean about her past with Purcell. "Is there something between you I need to know?" Patty thinks about that Skinemax special she shot with Purcell in the early 80s, but then remembers that she had all copies destroyed. Then when it found its way onto the internet, she had the internet destroyed as well. She blows off Tommy's question. (Much like she blew a certain lying scientist we all know and love...heyo!!)
But seriously, Tommy, did you really expect an answer?
After the credits we see Ellen in her hotel room, talking to Dee and Dum. They've picked up their suits from the dry cleaners, and are no longer the distracted slobs of the last episode. They ask about the screw-up with Tommy and she says that he was taken off the infant mortality case, right before the payoff was meant to occur. "I don't see how Patty could have known we were setting Tom up," Ellen says. That's because you're an idiot.
Ellen asks about the Purcell case, and Dum tells her they're "putting a pin in that," even though it's all Patty cares about right now. Strangely, Ellen starts putting on her shoes and adjusting her outfit. She didn't get dressed before her visit with the FBI? Dee tells her they need to lay low until they figure out why the Tommy plan didn't work, even though that was detailed in the last episode. These are our tax dollars at work, people. Ellen says her cover's fine and Patty doesn't suspect a thing. Again, I say thee idiot.
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