Looks like Charity, Alyssa, and Tony managed to make it to the barmitzvah with Lachey this time. He asks them about what's it like to watch the show after they've been kicked off, but they say some non scandalous, supportive bs about their teams. One thing we do know is that either Tony/Charity or Lacy is going to be pre-ty smug at the end of the night, since they can say kicking them off is the reason the team lost.
Smug City.
Team Carrie Ann gets ready to record their first single, "Come With It" and everyone on the team is stoked. The stoked might be turning into cocky, however, as Carrie Ann says that they're scattered in rehearsals because the voting is over, but that they should have some persepctive as they're debuting their new single. She then goes one by one talking about how great it was to work with them all.
The first week bradley lost all his confidence and had to struggle to find his way back, but whoever is feeding him this confidence may want to cut back the dosage. I think Bradley is taken in better with a little humility. She also says that mariela nd Elizabeth have become singer/dancers as opposed to just singers, and that Qis and Chris have come into their own shell. Bradley does his obnoxious eye roll thing and says if they're broken up it'll be devastating, but I'm hoping the momentum is still rolling in Team Bruno's way.
I can't take any more of this guy, even if it is fleeting.
Team Carrie Ann performs their song and it'snot quite as catchy as Team Bruno's. It looks more like a number from High School Musical 18 or whatever version is out nowadays. Carrie Ann is superproud and interrupts Lachey to go hug them, but Bruno points out Chris and says that he nailed it tonight. He responds by shaking his hands in the air like a baby, or like a girl who just won prom queen.
I'd like to thank Krissy who did my hair, and Kenny Mayne who went with me to the Clinique booth at the mall Macy's for a free makeup job!
It's time for the last three stars of Dancing With the Stars and we start with Jason Taylor, lineman for the Miami Dolphins. Kenny asks Lisa if he's the most handosme NFL player they've ever had, and she says the he is "by far the most goregeous" to which Kenny adds, "compared to those mongrels." Jerry Rice meanwhile plans to kick his ass after the show.
When Tiki Barber has an exclusive contract with NBC, you go to plan B
The next star is Shannon Elizabeth and if you can believe it American Pie was 9 years ago. Kenny Mayne goes over her stats and when he mentions that she's 34 years old, he says, "wow, she's getting up there." Oh you charming sellout! Nowadays, Elizabeth plays a lot of poker and cashes in on appearances from a 9 year old role. Hope this restarts your acting career, Shannon. Maybe you can get a role on a CW show.
One Tree Hill hired K-Fed, so you know their standards have to be low
The final star is Priscilla Presley!!!! Well for those true blue Rock and Roll enthusiasts, I'm sure this is the equivalent of priscilla taking a big dump on Elvis' grave. That being said, this show needs another Marie Osmond, and knowing Priscilla's history with painkillers, an on-air faint is totally within the realm of possibility.
"Pharmacy bills ain't cheap"
Lachey asks Bruno and Carrie Ann's thoughts on the new stars, and Bruno seems to be looking forward to the stable of men coming up. He asks if anyone noticed that all the contestants have "huge feet. I hope they can use it well, I'll tell you that." With that in mind, Team Bruno and Team Carrie Ann's stable of performers come out for a big all group dance number. The divas Lacey and Mariel start off solo, like Jennifer Hudson and Jennifer Holliday battling it out. The song is, appropriately, "One Night Only."
It's a nicely produced way to finish up the number, except for one distracting caveat. Zack and Bradley clash in the center of the stage to see who looks the gayest. Bradley, in the silver shirt and sleeveless jacket would win on almost any occassion, but Zack's gold lame ensemble has to be the gayest thing ever made.
Well, next to Bradley of course
« Lost: Love and Rockets | Main | Lipstick Jungle: Live Nude Boys »
Comments (5)
First of all, HayHor let me say, way to take one for the team in having to recap this show. Your recaps made it a lot more entertaining than it actually was. I must mention the fact that Lachey said "The winner of the FIRST Dance Wars is..." and that he also said see you next season. Now is this hopeful conjecture on his part or is it a done deal? I'm not sure I'll be watching Season 2. Guess it depends what else is on at the time. I was a little surprised Team Bruno won, but I agree that Kelsey is one hot little number. Some of the new "Dancing Stars" are pretty interesting choices. You are right about Adam Carolla, he definitely gets on my female nerves for some reason. So anyway, I was not really planning on watching That's Amore, because I am biologically of an age where the only thing I'm supposed to do with MTV is bitch about remembering the days when they actually played videos. And Remote Control, hey-o, that was a great show. But anyway, I'll still be reading your recaps.
1 of 5 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on February 20, 2008 2:51 AM
BTW, the Happy Feet caption was priceless! Drew was actually a good dancer on DWTS but he looked pretty damn awkward with some of the steps in that number.
2 of 5 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on February 20, 2008 4:41 AM
this may sound stupid but wouldn't marlee matlin have trouble dancing and keeping the beat if she cant hear the music?
please someone help me out here
3 of 5 | Posted by angelbayyb | Posted on February 20, 2008 9:32 AM
I think the plan is to use an intricate light-signal system. Kind of like Richard Dreyfuss' touching rendition of the Beatles "Beautiful Boy" in Mr. Holland's Opus. That way Marlee can use her overdeveloped 4 senses.
Actually, that's all made up. I'm sure they'll have some kind of system that will be a good 5 minutes of filler on the show as they explain it to us. But hey, if a shrewy, gimp divorcee can do it, why not a seemingly sweet, nonthreatening deaf person?!?
4 of 5 | Posted by HayHor | Posted on February 20, 2008 11:52 AM
HayHor, since Team Bruno won a recording contract, what name do you think they are going to record under? The Douche, The Mormon, The Hottie, and The Other Girl?
5 of 5 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on February 20, 2008 12:52 PM