Bruno on...
Mariel - "I've got to have Mariel [sounds like 'Mario']. The voice of an angel!"
Charity - "Charity is the tigress and the girl next door. How exciting is that?!"
Alyssa - "You'd be CRAzy [extra inflection/cracking of the voice on the "A"] not to want Alyssa on your team."
Elizabeth - "Voice, personality. I call her my mini Madonna." [sounds like "mi-NI ma-DO-na"
Kelsey - "I'd like to work with Kelsey...[whispers] the sex kitten."
Corina - "She's the Hollywood Babe, the Paris Hilton of the group." [voice went from chipper to grossed out by the name "Paris Hilton" all in one sentence]
Lacey - "If Carrie Ann tries to get Lacey, there'll be chairs flying out this studio and she'll be going with it!!!!"
Ultimately, Bruno gets first pick and selects Lacey because he wants a "diva" in the group and Kelsey because he needs a "very strong dancer, someone hot, sexy, solid." Carrie Ann picks Mariel because she's got "soul" and is the grounding of the group, and Elizabeth because while she's "not the best all-around," she's got some "fire" in her. This truly is a Disney channel pop group waiting to happen with Mariel, Elizabeth, Chris, and Bradley.
"Hi, we're the Disney channel's newest group and we have some awesome news! We're pregnant!"
Our last 3 guys and our last 3 girls are doing their last auditions for the final 4 spots. The 3 girls go up to Bruno and Carrie Ann and each sing a line from "Survivor." Charity kind of yells so that's already a bad start for her - it's gotta come down to her and Corina (who yelps during the song while getting red-faced). There's no way Alyssa is gonna be dropped, especially because she seems to be the only one who delivers in this final tryout. Let's take four swigs for Charity and Corina - one for each tone deaf ear.
Someone should really make a donation to Charity. Look at this poor thing.
Qis, Max and Philip are up and singing some Boyz II Men "End of the Road". Qis starts off ok, but MAXX kind of butchers it and gives the judges the crazy eye while singing - double f-up.
Two swigs now - one for each crazy eye
Philip, I regretfully say, sings well, but while looking at him doing this I'm not so unconvinced he's not a Carter. As in Aaron and Nick Cater. That would explain a lot.
Nickname -elect: Giant Douche Carter
Based on the last singing tryout, Bruno and Carrie Ann have made their decisions. Corina and Maxx are going home presumably cause Corina was too hoe-ish and distracted, and Maxx is just kind of weird and weird looking - right? Bruno went with Philip and Charity - two points I want to make about this. First of all, I hope this leads to some serious ego battles between Philip and Zach. I'm sure you, dear readers, agree with me. Secondly, Charity isn't better than Corina. Corina was just a dumb ho who didn't say the right things. You're on a reality show bitch, act humble/demure (didn't you learn anything from Kelly Clarkson). Oh well too late for her. Carrie Ann went ahead with Alyssa and Qis which is as perfectly boring as Carrie Ann. And there you have it - your dance War Teams from now until the end of this craptastic piece of reality television. You see week next! Too drunk - pout assing. Readers Bye.
"We'll be matching your BAC levels soon, HayHor!"
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Comments (3)
Love ya HayHor, but the song is "Don't Stop Til You Get ENOUGH". Actually, I think I like your title better though.
1 of 3 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on January 17, 2008 3:30 AM
One wonders who picked "The Beat Goes On". It's in such a low register...hard to sing it properly if you're not Cher.
2 of 3 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on January 17, 2008 3:43 AM
I always thought Michael Jackson was pervier than usual (at least for 1980's Michael Jackson) when he sang that song. I guess it all makes sense now. Thanks wintersux!
Also, yeah, the Beat Goes On takes a specail voice like Cher, or Bobby Goulet (god bless him).
3 of 3 | Posted by hayhor | Posted on January 17, 2008 6:33 AM