Len says that this is what he has been talking about all night. He thought it was great and said their timing worked with the music. Bruno says that Warren knows the Funk: "He eases his way in, builds up the rhythm and delivers a HUGE climax at the end!" There's disgusting Bruno. Sidenote, Jesus Christ what is that singer in green wearing? Scores for Warren and Kym: 8, 8, 9, for a total of 25. Sounds like the audience and I agree that those scores should have been waaay higher.
Everything looks healthy. Next check up is in six months.
Next up Cloris and Corky, who will Salsa. Last week they got their best scores yet, but still ended up in the bottom two. This week's rehearsal time waster, we see Cloris out meeting her adoring public. Corky thinks Cloris' acting skills helped them last week and asks her to bring that again this week to their Salsa.
In performance, Cloris once again knows all her steps! She's not half bad when she actually puts some effort in. I mean, she still moves like and 80 year old, but she's moving! It's actually a cute routine and though he fondles her chest as part of the choreography, the routine was not as vulgar as it has been in previous weeks.
I was worried when the number began like this.
Bruno comments that "the old girl can still turn a trick." Bruno is such an underminer.He compliments that she actually did a Salsa, but it looked like she'd had a pitcher of Margaritas before she performed. Carrie Ann says she loves Cloris because everyone in the audience loves her. Um, that's not really a good reason when you're a JUDGE. Len loves Cloris because she's the only person on this show older than he is. Scores for Cloris: 7, 7, 7, for a total of 21. Why is everyone getting 21's or 22's? Can the judges give anything besides a 7?
Did that little rat face just call me an old whore?
Up next are Maurice Green and Cheryl Burke. They had a hit from the judges last week, and it's manifesting itself in Cheryl as insecurity about doing the Salsa. Cheryl snobs that she teaches ballroom, not salsa, so she's on unfamiliar ground as well. She's having trouble teaching him because she herself isn't sure what's going on. They have mini-drama in rehearsal because she thinks he doesn't care when really he's just trying not to freak out because that would be counterproductive. It's such a lovers' quarrel. Are they doin' it?
When you finish the toilet paper, replace the roll! Do I have to write it on the bathroom wall?
In performance, I'm totally mesmerized by Cheryl's poufy skirt. They dance well, and Maurice gets into it, blowing a kiss to the judges. All that freaking out from Cheryl worked out because they look great. He shakes and shimmies and keeps up well with Cheryl and that's something considering it looks like he didn't have time to change out of his red satin pajamas.
He tooted a Cheryl!
Carrie Ann summons Maurice Green in a fake out of bad criticism, but of course, she just loved it and gives him a big hug. Is Carrie Ann wearing a Marchesa gown? Specifically, the one Ann Hathaway wore to the Oscars last year? Does this show have that kind of budget? You'd think they could some singers with better pitch then... Anyways, Len comments that apparently the judges comments are nothing compared to criticism from Cheryl! He says that if he could, he would give Maurice a 10 on energy alone. So Cheryl's ass-kicking worked! Scores from the judges: 9, 9, 9, for a total of 27, their best score by far!
Last up are the couples doing the Jitterbug. I wonder how, exactly, this differs from the Jive. I'm sure one of the judges will run it down for us. Or not!
Brooke Burke and Derek have been at the top of the leader board for the past four weeks in a row. Can anyone stop her already? Last week Len thought their dancing was a little too dirty, but they were still in the lead by a good six points. Derek doesn't want them to get comfortable, so he's pushing for a first place dance every week. Np pressure! He, like the other pros, is a little frustrated while teaching because he's never done it before in his life. He has to wikipedia how to do the Jitterbug. Ridiculous. Appropriate because he says they want to look like cartoons.
It worked.
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Comments (5)
Still not watching... but love reading your recaps.
Sounds like Cloris is to this show what Sanjaya was to American Idol (is there a webb site called vote4theoldest.com?)
1 of 5 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on October 24, 2008 11:32 AM
The best part of the re-cap show that aired before the results show was that they were able to repeat the performances, judges comments, and scores all in under an hour. What was missing? The backstage interviews, which just reiterated how useless Useless is.
2 of 5 | Posted by leenie | Posted on October 24, 2008 11:37 AM
Oh and also, I hate how they judge Cloris against herself instead of against the other dancers, it's annoying me to no end. I take this show wayyyy to seriously.
3 of 5 | Posted by leenie | Posted on October 24, 2008 12:56 PM
this show blows w/o Maks.
and Cheryl Burke saying she only gained 5 lbs is like Kim (real housewife atlanta) saying she is only 29.
4 of 5 | Posted by gitgo | Posted on October 25, 2008 7:33 PM
hahahaha omg this recap made me laugh so hard i peed.
awesome guys, way too awesome.
5 of 5 | Posted by AuJew | Posted on October 28, 2008 9:16 AM