Len called it a joyful thing to watch, except his feet. Len is just disgusted by feet tonight. Bruno says Warren releases contagious fun, so it's hard for him to dissect the technique because it hardly matters when everyone's having so much fun. And not in a Cloris Leachman uncomfortable fun way. Carrie Ann also comments on Warren's flat feet, but noticed that he hit all his moves regardless. She liked it. Scores for Warren: 9, 8, 9, for a total of 26 and the night's total of 54.
Everyone's got the trophy in their sights now that it's a week from the semifinals, so who goes home?
And now it's time for the results show recap!
I have to say, it's getting pretty interesting seeing how these people creatively waste an hour. Let's start with our favorite waste of space.
Look how cute little Cody is when he's not making a stupid face!
It might help that he's standing next to a fifty year old man.
Because there hasn't been enough rehashing yet, what with only a previous hour to relive the hour and a half that preceded it, the judges sit around a round table and rehash shit again.
Bruno: Whatchoo doin'?
Len: Nothin. What are you doing?
Bruno: Nothin'.
Carrie Anne: Why don't you guys ever talk to me?
(pause)
Bruno: Did you hear something?
Len: No. Did you?
Len wants to see Warren and Kim's tango again. That old bastard just wants to see if he can give the big boy a heart attack.
Jeeze, costume people, could you make that neckline a little tighter?
Dear Santa, please send me the souls of butterflies to much on for Christmas. Love, Martha.
Backstage, Useless asks Brooke how she's gonna come back from her lower than usual scores last night.
Lots and lots of eye makeup.
Then Cody gets to show off his two, count em, two women.
Boner check. Still nothing? Keep trying, little one.
Cody says that Julianne taught him everything he knows, and Julianne is quick to step in and clarify that he meant dancing, and not boning. Come on, girl, that's not in doubt. Now if Maks was his partner...
Useless asks Julianne if she'd like to thank Edyta for filling in, and Julianne thanks her, but it sounds kinda patronizing because she said "and I really mean that". When people say that they usually don't. Was it just me? I think Julianne wants Edyta dead. Discuss.
Back to the bench bitch. My appendix are gone, but I've still got fists.
Brad Paisley, country supastaaaah, is up next. He's singing a song called Tick. Brad looks straight into the camera with what I think he means as cfm eyes, but he looks like he's stifling a burp.
Blow it out your nostrils and pretend nothing happened.
The song is about meeting some chick in a bar that he wants to bang. Sample lyric "I wish I was your beer." Country music is nothing if not consistent, I'll give it that. This is all well and good until Lacey comes out dancing with her brother Benji. Then things just get downright creepy. They enter on the line "I wanna see the other half of your butterfly tattoo."
Hey the butterfly tattoo's on my ankle, jerk. I'm telling Mom. And the police.
Ah, put your fears to rest. No incest here. Benji makes Lacey look like GI Jane.
That was kinda gross. Please don't come back to my dressing room, k?
Next, a clip about why audience members came to the show.
Thanks to Brooke, I can put my ankles behind my head now. It's taking a little more practice to get my fist into my mouth, but dammit I'm working on it.
A guy tells Warren "YES. YOU. CAN!"
And then he shouts it to every black person he sees. White people are retards.
I came all this way to see Cody's tight little butt in person.
Then, these girls say that Cody's just a white boy dancing. Ouch.
And you two got dressed like hos to enter the gay man's paradise. Morons.
We're here to invite Bruno home with us. And possibly Maurice. And Tom. Is it hot in here?
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Comments (2)
I know I'm probably totally alone in my thinking this but I just don't think Brooke is that good. I kinda think she dances okay but she always looks a little like a deer in the headlights to me. I always feel like there is one competitor who the judges love no matter what and then some of the others they come down on even though they seem like they do a better job.
1 of 2 | Posted by Reiray | Posted on November 14, 2008 10:25 AM
Reiray, I completely agree, I'm not on the Brooke bandwagon as the judges seem to be. She is a good dancer, but she's really not that entertaining and I think she's had a lot more dance training than she's putting on.
My favorite is Warren not only because he's entertaining, but I just enjoy watching him more than everyone else.
I think the final two will come down between Warren and Brooke. We have Warren, the entertainer vs. Brooke, the consistent yet boring one. My money's on Warren.
2 of 2 | Posted by bigjr6633 | Posted on November 15, 2008 7:37 PM