Wayne Newton and Cheryl have been practicing a tango for this week. I'm immediately distracted by the strange marks drawn under Wayne's nose...reminiscent of the Friends episode where Ross and Rachel go to Las Vegas. Maybe when they say "whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas," they mean Sharpie artwork...but I'm thinking not even heavy-duty soap is gonna wash that sad little mustache off. Wayne takes Cheryl to his ranch, Casa De Shenandoah, as part of the prep-work for the dance created by Argentine cowboys. What a beautiful backdrop for their rehearsals. And it will be a nice place for Wayne to lick his wounds when he's sent home, either this week or next. He's a sweet and charming man, but let's be honest here: a dancer he's not. And he really needs to stop thrusting his index digit out, as all I can hear is some grandfather saying, "pull my finger."
Get a rope.
Their tango consists of Mr. Las Vegas standing while Cheryl dances around him. Not a lot to critique here. It was not so much smoking as just smoke and mirrors. Carrie Ann compliments his outfit. That's American Idol speak for nothin' good to say. Bruno describes the look as a cross between Errol Flynn and Captain Hook, with a touch of Steven Segal. He must mean the pony-tail I was desperately trying to ignore. Len, too, decides, to be gentle and concentrate on appearance and character, not the movements, or lack there of. It's hard to mean to a legend...especially when the legend is such a nice guy. But the judges can't hide their real opinion: 18 points, which considering the attempt is still generous.
Floyd Mayweather and his partner Karina are next. First they re-run the clip of Floyd as Gingy. I know that's what I called him last week and I shouldn't repeat myself, but it makes me laugh...and that's what's important. The two have been working on the jive...all fancy footwork and sharp, defined movements, which should come easily for the world's top boxer. During the performance, though, Floyd looks hemmed in, and I think the problem may be his sport develops different muscles in the legs than dance. He's so muscular he can't extend his leg fully, like what's needed for ballroom. It's that same strength that allows him to annihilate people in the ring, though, so I don't expect him to offer a trade.
If only I could plié, I'd never hit anyone again!
Ultimately, he looks uncomfortable, and the judges reflect that in their comments. Len suggests Floyd get some different shoes, ones more suited to dancing, but praises the athlete for putting in the effort. Carrie Ann gives him props for energy and attitude but mentions the lack of structure, and Bruno, for the third week in a row, ardently wishes Floyd would tap into his potential. Before the score, Tom Bergeron reminds us of the results show guests, then adds a kicker for Cavemen and Carpoolers, which are surprisingly still on the air. Final tally: 21. There it is! I knew we couldn't escape at least one score of the mediocre.
Jane Seymore has returned from England where she was for her mother's funeral, and is joined by Tony. The video, of course, reviews what Jane went through following her mother's stroke earlier this year, and the 92 year-old woman's death last week. Jane's recollections are heartfelt, and it's easy to relate to her pain. We're told she's channeling her emotions into this week's tango, and she and Tony are dedicating the dance to Jane's mom. Well....I can't mock that, but I can certainly take a swipe at that fact that it looked like the woman had stolen Jane Hathaway's hair. Or possiblyt Lza Minelli's. Bad wig. Very bad wig.
I know you're depressed, but do something about your hair. You're on TV.
Great tango, however, with all the sex-appeal the others were lacking. Is it wrong to say "nice use of grief?" Bruno first expresses the judge's collective condolences, then becomes effusive in his praise of her dance, calling her a passionate, dramatic siren. As opposed to those lackadaisical, nonchalant sirens. Len describes the two as haughty and proud. Carrie Ann is moved to tears, in a good way, by the expression of emotion as a beautiful dance. 27 total. Part of me wishes they had given her at least one perfect 10, if only for her mom.
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Comments (2)
I was bummed with Helio's score.
I was, again, one of the best on the floor, and he walked away with 24 points?
Did anyone else see him pull up after one of his leaps? I think he hurt his ankle again...add that to the scraped knee, and he totally deserved a higher score.
I hope he has a slower, less physical dance the next couple of weeks so he'll have time to heal.
1 of 2 | Posted by ThisShowRocks! | Posted on October 11, 2007 2:37 PM
Thank you for the beefcake.
Finally, you understand what we want.
2 of 2 | Posted by weasel dearest | Posted on October 12, 2007 12:58 PM