They are the first couple safe! Jerry Rice and Kenny Mayne join Len for Dance Center, which is like Sports Center, but with glitter. And fewer balls.
Texas Tech didn't have much of a chance, but they sang their hearts out and proudly waved spirit fingers in unison all the way to a win. Holla ballas, let's slap each other's butts now.
Flatley was a better judge than you. How can you show your face here?
That's why I had him set on fire. Is that a spot on my head? Do you see that?
The elections are tomorrow. Who you voting for?
Duh. I'm voting for the black guy. Palin!
You betcha!
Len, why are you so quiet all the sudden?
What? I didn't say anything.
The blood is trying very hard to reach his pee pee. Go, old boner! Go!
You're ignorant. Let's talk about the Looch. Hot or not?
She has frog legs and dry hair. May I suggest...
It could only help at this point.
Finally. We can all agree on something. On to Maurice.
Len? Hello? Stop thinking about boners.
And...he poops.
Lance. Wasn't he almost the first gay guy on the Russian moon? He and Laci could be sisters.
Or you could morph them into Ellen DeGeneres.
You killed Len's almost boner with that one. Moving on to Brooke. She's had nineteen babies and is still smokin. Attractive I mean. Smoking when you're pregnant is wrong.
Brooke in her third trimester.
Brooke getting a checkup.
Gross. Enough baby talk. Now let's talk about babes.
Jerry: Gay.
Kenny: Gay.
Len: (silence.)
Please stop. I'm comfortable enough with my sexuality to wear glitter on national TV, but you're seriously disgusting me right now. Did you just poop?
Dame Edna isn't answering that question.
Len: OK sorry. Let me make it up to you by showing you how to dance. I'll clean up and meet you in the rehearsal room.
Alright you know what? I quit. My ass is my property!
WTF? That segment was appalling. And now for a number about magic. Because this show really really needs to be an hour.
Cloris' thong? Coming up with that old thing's not magic. She probably threw it at him.
This looks like my living room right now.
That's nothing. Brooke can do this with a cantaloupe.
Wow. You can scratch your back. Good for you.
That smoke machine sucks. I can see you.
You know what this hour needs? Another Lionel Ritchie song! Dancing on the Ceiling! But not the version you know! This one's young! And fresh! And NEW!
We're making the same face right now.
The deaf chick loved it. I smell a comeback!
God, I'm exhausted. Is it time to go home yet?
Yes! I would like to thank the Academy, the producers, the writers, the costumers, the caterers, the dog walkers, the PAs, the maids, my agent, God, and you lovely audience. Thank you so much for this daytime emmy. Wait. What? YOU VOTED ME OFF? FUCK YOU PEOPLE! YOU'RE GONNA PAAAAYYYYY!!!!!
See you next week! xo
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Comments (3)
Recap scores: 10, 10,10!
The screengrabs are brill.
Now Looch can get back to her real job @ AMC. During her solo dance, I thought she looked like the Madame Tussaud version of herself. Maybe it was and Tony had her feet connected to the tops of his shoes.
1 of 3 | Posted by shantigal | Posted on November 10, 2008 8:33 AM
Didn't Kenny Mayne used to look more, well, normal??? What has happened to his face?? He looks like that picture of Madonna after she had dermabrasion and her cheeks and lips puffed up.
2 of 3 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on November 10, 2008 1:08 PM
Great recap!!
I think Kenny Mayne is all goofy looking on purpose to make fun.
3 of 3 | Posted by incognito | Posted on November 10, 2008 2:53 PM