Back in the green room there's a Steve Guttenberg love-fest going on in celebration of him making it to the next round. Adam Carolla - although I nailed his humor in the last recap - becomes by fucking hero by making fun of the eyebrows on the Jonas Brothers trannie. AWESOME!!! I can only hope that this sends the kid into a spiral before their next performance. Maybe he'll shave them off. At least then it'll be easier to pencil them in for his future drag shows.
Tom then goes on to giving a completely paid-for shout-out to Nate Berkus from "Oprah's Big Give". I'm surprised they didn't have Samantha wear a gown made from Nate Berkus' bed sheets.
After Samantha stumbles through yet another sentence that's written on a friggin' tele-prompter right in front of her, they announce that Jason and Edyta and Mario and Karina are all safe. No big shock there - they're the 2 strongest guys by far.
We then get to see a montage of interview clips from the contestants in regards to their feelings about "double-elimination". Ok - seriously - the producers are stretching this shit out way too far. It's bad enough we have to sit through an hour just to hear 2 names announced. These elimination shows could be done in under a minute. Thank God for Tivo or (if you just read the recaps) ME!
Monica says she wants to stay on the show because she loves all the "girly stuff".

Like when they try to paint over her hump.
And then there's a really sad clip in which Jason talks about moving his wife and kids to LA for the taping - followed by a clip of this:

Oh "Dancing with the Stars" - thou shalt be called "Extreme Home Wrecker".
I actually laughed out loud when the Gut said "I put everything in my life on hold." Like what Steve?! I'm guessing that "everything" is pretty much just shows that need to be "tivo'd". And you can still hold yourself and cry during the competition - so you're not missing much.
Mario calls it "cruel" that someone has to go home. WHAT?!? How far removed from reality is this reality show?! Come on people! Get a grip! Worse case scenario is you have to return to your regular lives. Oh. Ooooohh. Yeah - that's pretty shitty. Nevermind! FEAR FOR YOUR LIVES!!!
Back to Tom and Samantha - we find out that Adam and Julianne are the next safe couple. Now it's between Penn and Cristian. Len says Cristian is good to stay until the finals. Carrie calls Penn large - I think that says it all.
Tom finally announces that Penn is the guy going home!!! HOOOORAY!!!!! No surprise there. However Teller looks like he's going to off himself at the thought of returning to work with this guy. Penn says he's going to soldier on and perform in the parking lot next week. Awesome! For his next trick he can turn into a speed bump! At least Kym's toes can begin the healing process.
Next up we have the women's elimination round! During the clips Marlee refers to herself as the "deaf broad". LOVE HER!!!!!!! That is awesome. Now if only we can get MJW to refer to herself as "Chubbers".
Tom and Samantha then reveal that the first couple safe is Shannon and Derek. Then they go to season 5's Cameron Mathison's for a segment of fan interviews.

Cameron also proves that your dignity never returns after being on "Dancing with the Stars".
One of the fans comments that she loves Priscilla being on the show to "represent senior citizens" - hahahahah! Love it! However this lady goes on to do a little dance. At first I get a fork all ready to claw my eyes out - and then - what's this!? The lady can totally groove! She fucking pop locks!

PRI'S GOT COMPETITION! SAY WHAT?!?
This lady's got the hots for Jason Taylor:

Jonas Brothers take note. This is what one of you will look like in 10 years. It happened to Nick Carter - it'll happen to you.

Cameron then goes on to backhand some girl that questioned whether or not he's been working out.
Jaques Hyme's dancers then perform an aerial dance. Two people hang from the ceiling in a tangled up bed sheet. So much for doing it with the lights on being considered kinky. Then there's a spinning, flying ball that everyone's flying around on. I get totally tripped out when a couple starts flying around on invisible wires. I think there's wires involved. Otherwise they must have stumbled upon Guttenberg's meds.
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Comments (2)
Great commentary! Only comments are:
-Judging/Elimination is 50% judges' scores, and 50% viewer votes
-Did you mean Julianne Hough? Who is Shannon?
1 of 2 | Posted by oodle_noodle | Posted on March 31, 2008 6:24 PM
Oops, duh, I know who Shannon is.....
2 of 2 | Posted by oodle_noodle | Posted on March 31, 2008 6:28 PM