Later that same afternoon, another polka dot box arrives! "Jo, I'm really looking forward to our first date. Glad you finally got out of Orange County. Welcome to LA, where the sky's the limit. Look beautiful - that won't be hard for you. - David." Well, of course the "beautiful" comment strikes a chord with Jo. David's in so far. She pulls a Louis Vuitton scarf out of the box, so now David is in like Flynn. Keep it up David, and you've got this in the bag. When Jo arrives to meet David he ties the scarf around her eyes as a blindfold and takes her into a building. They go up on the roof and find... a helicopter! David tells Jo he's about to show her LA HIS way. Oh, he must be really important and special. Slade watches on the laptop and for once has no snide comment. Hmm, so helicopters weren't YOUR thing, Slade? David falls all over Jo, saying he's heard a little bit of her music and that he loves it. He would also love to take on the role of picking up her dirty laundry and washing her dishes - in other words, be her manager.
Later, back at Slade's house, the guys rehash David's date and trash talk each other. But the next morning Jo gets another call from Slade, who is just calling to throw his weight around. He tells her to have fun on her next date and then "accidentally" says, "I love you." Oh brother. Jo hangs up and whines to the brunette friend that she misses Slade. Oh honey, if you want that piece of crap you can have him. Please - get him off the street and spare the rest of us.
Date #4 - Nelson
And now for the final polka dot hat box of the evening. "Hey Jo, I can't wait to meet you. They've saved the best for last! Get ready for some fun in the sun, this date is gonna rock your world. Dress sporty but comfortable. See you soon! - Nelson." Sporty, of course. He's the personal trainer. Jo pours on some leggings and puts her hair in pigtails. And let's not forget the four pounds of makeup. She arrives at the beach looking like an underage tramp to go rock climbing with Nelson, which he says tells a lot about a person (the rock climbing, not the underage tramp thing). Nelson scales the rock first and as he goes Jo tells him his butt looks cute from where she is. Oh the class. She continues to compliment his body and I wonder if she's noticed those eyebrows, which are the most deserving of praise. When it's Jo's turn to climb Nelson tells her that her butt looks good, too, to which Slade responds at the laptop, "I'm so glad they're butt buddies." Aw, jealous that your sophisticated lady finds an outdoorsy type attractive?
"Did you get a good look at my butt from THIS angle?"
Jo gets to the top of the rock and the personal trainer approves. Then they move on to a squirt gun fight on the sand that quickly becomes a wet t-shirt contest. At least these people aren't predictable.
Later on, back at Slade's, the boys fret some more over whom Jo might choose. Yawn. At Jo's the three girls gather to go back over all the details of each date and see how each guy measures up to the Untouchable Slade. Double Yawn. I'm still trying to guess what any of these girls actually look like under all their makeup and I still have no idea. The makeup may have cerebral powers, though, because now the girls come up with another totally spontaneous idea. This one is to go to Slade's and crash whatever the guys are doing! Oh these silly girls. Will they ever stop? They successfully arrive at Slade's and then all sit around drinking and flirting until Jo decides to pull Slade into the bedroom and see how he's handling all this. He tells her it's kind of uncomfortable, but he's there to help her and he wants what's best. Yes, that speech again. Jo is totally confused about whom she will choose to stay in the house.
"We are bestest, bestest friends now."
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Comments (10)
Honey Gangsta, honey, you are so lucky, you don't know the HALF of the inanity of this pair of assholes. Jo's parents won the California Lottery, she is sooooo nouveau riche it's not even funny. You hit Slade on the head, he is a total douchebag AND the house they showed him owning in the O.C. got foreclosed on! (I guess the Amex Black Card that he so proudly displayed during the first season of RHWOOC wasn't good enough to stave off the creditors!) I would be willing to bet blood that the so-called "Slade's house" they are filming in is probably owned by Bravo and/or NBC Universal, not the legend himself. If you had seen them on the RHWOOC, I think two words would have clanged relentlessly in your mind like they did in mine... "pretentious climbers"...
I, too, am all a-flutter in hot anticipation of Jo's awesome rockin' album (when when WHEN will they satisfy the desires of the downtrodden American masses...? The economy is in the toilet and we can't afford to buy anything, we need a new CD by Jo De La Rosa to make us all feel better! I know that just listening to it will make us feel like ROCK STARS! Or maybe just a whole lot smarter, either one.)
And David was a smarmy asshole, but that's exactly what Jo likes, so it was no shock she kept the guy around who made the appearance of spending the most money on her. Que puta!
love, J-Mo :)
1 of 10 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on July 24, 2008 7:16 AM
David is David Weintraub...he was on that reality show, Sons of Hollywood with Randy Spelling and Sean Stewart. So I wouldn't be surprised if he, Jo, and Slade already knew each other...maybe he is a plant to stir up drama.
2 of 10 | Posted by pixyamiga | Posted on July 24, 2008 7:34 AM
Ahhhh, that explains a lot! Well, douchebags of a feather and all that...
Also, just so you know how much of a Mother Teresa figure Slade is, his 5 year old son Grayson has brain cancer, but instead of spending every last waking moment with his dying kid, Slade is off filming a reality TV show. What a martyr!
love, J-Mo :)
3 of 10 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on July 24, 2008 7:49 AM
Sadly...I do watch the Real Housewives, but always found Jo & Slade's relationship creepy. Anyway I tuned in for this crapfest the other night and barely made it thru. I was not going to watch it...but now that HG is recapping...I may have to reconsider...or just tune in for the recaps.
Also...Jo totally "lives" (not sure if that's her real place) in the complex where LC & Heidi lived in the first season of the Hills. When they said they lived in "the hills" but really didn't...
And that is really sad about Slade's son Grayson, I had not heard that story.
4 of 10 | Posted by LNNC92 | Posted on July 24, 2008 10:25 AM
"Oh honey, if you want that piece of crap you can have him. Please - get him off the street and spare the rest of us."
Amen to that. I live in OC, and the less of those guys the better!
5 of 10 | Posted by mle428 | Posted on July 24, 2008 10:41 AM
So glad to see you are recapping this crapfest! I'm guessing that Jo and Slade will end up back together after this... Also, Michael looked familiar to me - was he on another reality show?
6 of 10 | Posted by jules | Posted on July 24, 2008 11:38 AM
I haven't watched this show (saw the commercials approx. 3,489x during PR) nor Real Housewives ... but saw HG was recapping, so had to read.
I'm so glad I did - will relish the recaps and avoid the show at all costs! Thanks for taking one for the team, HG!
7 of 10 | Posted by chelle | Posted on July 24, 2008 6:45 PM
Who ARE these people? I mean, seriously, WHO? Okay, I read the Real Housewives of Orange County explanation, and I read J-Mo's extra bits of info, but... ??? **confused**
I know the TYPE that these people are, and having NEVER been impressed with their ability to wear makeup and preen, while simultaneously being complete idiots, most people I know (including myself) avoid them at all costs. So, why is it that anyone in Hollywood, or at the networks, thinks that the masses give a flying rat's butt about Jo and her Bratz-doll-wannabe cohorts?
All that eye makeup just makes me think they're all trying to be porn stars.
And the guys... ugh. **shudder** I'm not even going there. Especially when the lot of them spend more time grooming themselves than most women. **violent shudder**
Would it be possible to just lock people like this away in their own little fantasy world, and let nature take it's course, or let them kill each other off, or SOMETHING!? Because being continuously assaulted by their inane whims in the guise of television entertainment is SO last decade (and SO nauseating).
My sympathies to you, HG, for having to sit through this.
8 of 10 | Posted by kreleia | Posted on July 25, 2008 1:54 AM
The only good thing about this show (and the reason I watched about 75% of it) was Michael. He was so handsome yet real because he wasn't full of himself like the other putzes! Goes to show you what a moron Jo is because she DIDN'T pick him. I'll take him!
As for Dumb and Dumber, could never stand Jo. She tried so hard to be Jessica Simpson from her Newlywed days when she was on RHOOC. She always called Slade "baby" like JS did to Nick. She talked in a baby voice (and apparently continues to) and she played the ditz card all the time. When she showed up for the Season 2 reunion show (with blonde hair a la JS), she actually ADMITTED to idolizing Jessica Simpson.
I love HG's description of the makeup. But even the 4 lbs. of it couldn't hide her awful complexion! BLECK!
I'd rather watch a show that just featured the life of Vicky or Jeana's spoiled kids. The heck with Jo and Slade!
9 of 10 | Posted by LittTwinStar | Posted on July 25, 2008 9:33 AM
I'm pretty sure she's back with Slade. One of my friends went to high school with Jo, and she was at the reunion last week with Slade as her date.
Interesting...
10 of 10 | Posted by mle428 | Posted on July 25, 2008 12:58 PM