This week on Desperate Housewives: Andrea Bowen earns some easy coma money; Bree thinks about telling Susan about her affair with Karl; Gabby and Ana butt heads (whaaa?); and Katherine becomes completely insane.
The fight over a plumber continues. Cuz that happens like all the...never.
Mary Alice blahs again, but this time it's about McCluskey, so I'll forgive it. Apparently, McCluskey and her new boyfriend, Roy are doin' it, and doin' it, and doin' it well. Look, I love McCluskey, and everyone should have a healthy and fun sex life, but in the immortal words of Valerie Cherish, "I don't need to see that!" Seriously. The Comeback. Rent it, stick with it through the first 3 or so episodes, and love it.
Anyway, McCluskey and Sex Toy Roy are walking throughout the neighborhood, and McC says she loves Roy, but she needs him to say it too. It's such a nice day for a walk. La dee da, just another beautiful day on Wisteria Lane. The sun is shining, not a cloud in the sky. The birds are singing. Someone is watering her lawn. The grass is green. The faint laughter of children can be heard from afar. And there's someone passed out by their trash cans. If I was walking through Wisteria Lane and saw that, I'd be all, "Meh. Par for the course. I wonder whatever happened to that nice black lady who hid her retarded kid in the basement. Oh well. Guess I'll head on over to Lynette's for some iced tea and shame."
That passed-out someone? Is Julie Mayer. And no, she didn't overdo it on the jageritas last night -- she was chortled -- strangled, if you will -- by some mystery dude(ette). Roy finds her and calls 911 on his cell phone. Aw, old people with cell phones -- so cute! But don't try to text them, as it confuses and enrages them. McCluskey screams, either from fright or being pissed off that Roy didn't get to say "I love you." Or maybe she just realized Nicolette Sheridan isn't coming back. Credits! Bah bah dah dah dah, bah dah dah dah, bah dah, bah dah, bah daahhhhhh!
That kid ruined my bit!
The titles state, "ten minutes earlier" . . . and five years and two months into the future, I might add. Mary Alice is all, The day started off so nice. Doesn't it always, Mary Alice? Isn't that what you're always saying? Isn't it always something like, "The day started out perfectly in the suburbs, until someone had a secret, because who knows what lurks behind hidden doors. Secrets. Suburbs. Suburbs. Secrets."
Bob of Bob & Lee GayCouple is outside reading his morning paper. Um, why does Tuc Watkins have his shirt on, Cherry? Fail. We're supposed to believe that Bob is happy about his "favorite sports team," but I'm willing to bet that he's excited about an ad regarding a 3-day sale on wicker at Hobby Lobby. Gabby's other daughter, the one who never gets to say anything, whacks her doll against the porch. Mike and Susan are in bed, and Susan's putting on some make-up for a little morning sex. I guess they didn't go on a honeymoon. Ugh, they're acting all cute and lovey, and luckily little M.J. interrupts all this because he wants to play in their room. When Mike and Susan finally remember who he is, they let M.J. into bed with them. I wish I was in bed with Mike. But not Susan. She can leave and I'll just call her in an hour so she can come back in and make french toast for Mike and I. McCluskey screams, most likely because it's all just too cute for her and she can't stand it.
This kid is the strangler. Just remember I said that when it's revealed in episode 24.
Over at Gabby's, Leona Lewis is on the phone with her friend. Ah, wait, it's Ana. She's blabbing about some guy, and then Gabby gives Ana some guy advice, mainly that she should play men like fiddles. McCluskey screams, most likely because of Carlos's new haircut.
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Comments (10)
Oooh, I like your theory of who the strangler just might be....
1 of 10 | Posted by Clair | Posted on October 7, 2009 2:07 PM
Yeah, I just assumed it was gonna end up being Katherine and "Green Day" is just a red herring. If it's that obvious, I am once and for all divorcing this show.
2 of 10 | Posted by sanen85 | Posted on October 7, 2009 2:40 PM
Here's the thing though: If it ends up being Katherine, they'll have to take her off the show. I mean, I wouldn't exactly forgive my friend or neighbor for strangling my daughter, and I don't think the viewers could either. And I'm not ready to see Katherine go, especially this soon after Edie was killed.
I'm really disappointed in the way the writers have been portraying Katherine this season. Her bitchery and snipe and one-upman-ness towards Bree was one of the things that made season 4 so interesting, not to mention her dark secret. I was upset that she didn't have much to do last year, but I'm even more upset about how damn psycho she's being now.
Another possible suspect, though, is Ana. She's an expendable character, and she's already proven that she's into Green Day. But the strangling may have happened when she was at that club or something. I don't know.
3 of 10 | Posted by hypnotoad | Posted on October 7, 2009 8:12 PM
To me, the suspect could be the dad, as he thought she was beneath him . . . and I agree about Ana being about 10 times hotter than Julie . . . she's got it going on! I'm actually glad to see Gabby step up and try to parent her . . . I think a smassportion is in order . . . sorry, but I can't stand their story for days . . . snore . . . and more kids is just ugh--I liked it better when they were cheating, call me dirty, okay, that's right, now slap me hard . . .oo, sorry . . .
I thought last season, Kath couldn't pull off suddenly being all nice, this works better for me, I just hope she's more subtle and works it's hard for that snore of a plumber . .. . ach!
Loving Bree and Carl, yay, at last a pairing I can get behind, or between, or on top of, you name it . . .
Hypno, you rock, loved the recap!!!!
4 of 10 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on October 8, 2009 12:35 PM
So Julie didn't tell her Mom who she was dating? Those two are disgusting the way they each other everything!! May be pregnant by someone as she describes "Complicated"?
Who is thinking Zach will be making a visit to Wisteria Lane?
5 of 10 | Posted by Exile3600 | Posted on October 10, 2009 9:32 PM
With all due respect I am so tired of the Lynette emasculates Tom claims. I've never seen someone supposedly so henpecked get his way so often and I've never seen a bullying supposed shrew of a wife rearrange her own desires to suit her husband's whims. Frankly I can't give a rat's rear end (and let's be honest, neither does Tom) about window boxes, bird houses and hamburger vs chicken for dinner when his first choice is unavailable when he's going to college like he wanted to, opened the pizzeria like he wanted to, played in the garage band, like he wanted to, got the large family he wanted and got Lynette to give up her career and raise the kids for several years like he wanted.
6 of 10 | Posted by shenbrat | Posted on January 2, 2010 4:48 PM
With all due respect I am so tired of hearing about how Lynette supposedly emasculates Tom. I don't buy it. I've never seen a supposedly hen pecked hubby get his way so often and I've never seen the supposed bullying shrew of a wife cave on what she wants so often and rearrange what she wants so often to match her bullied hubby's whims. I can't give a rat's rear end about window boxes and bird houses (and let's be honest, either can Tom). Not when he got to go to college like he wanted opened the pizzeria he wanted, played in the guitar band like he wanted, got the large family like he wanted and got Lynette to stay home with them for several years like he wanted. Sure Lynette's in control-control of how and when to cave into Tom's whims.
7 of 10 | Posted by shenbrat | Posted on January 2, 2010 4:55 PM
Okay then . . . duly noted.
8 of 10 | Posted by Hypnotoad | Posted on January 2, 2010 8:21 PM
Sorry I was so spirited and that 2 posts showed (I thought the first one didn't take). It's not that I want to disrespect different opinions, but it just seems like the whole story isn't looked at when it comes to Lynette and Tom's control dynamic. I think folks see she has the stronger personality and she can come on like gangbusters, but forget that in the end she gets guilted and caves. It's a pattern that Tom benefits from.
9 of 10 | Posted by shenbrat | Posted on January 7, 2010 7:52 PM
Dude, it's no big deal!
Personally, I think both Lynette and Tom are passive-aggressive idiots, actually.
10 of 10 | Posted by hypnotoad | Posted on January 7, 2010 8:30 PM