This week on the 96th episode of Desperate Housewives, Lynette gives Anne the boot, Katherine reveals her secret to Susan, Bree overdoses on the Tylenol PM, Carlos may get his sight back, and Dave does a bad, bad thing.
That's what you get for having that picture in your house in the first place.
Gabby walks around feeling sad about losing her looks as Mary Alice voice-overs about it. Wow, this is something different for Gabby! Anyway, who needs to look pretty when your husband is blind? I would totally do the same thing. When she arrives at the hospital to see a slightly burned Carlos, the doctor spouts some B.S. about how Carlos has a bone fragment that they must have missed 5 years ago. I guess if they remove it, then Carlos could regain his sight. Yay! Not so much for Gabby, who instantly thinks of how this will affect her. She gots to get prettified and soon. Gabby, it's called a shake for breakfast, one for lunch, and then a sensible dinner! It's that easy! Credits.
Then you could dress like a house plant and still look hot!
Mary Alice blahs about how there was a fire and people were injured in it. Thanks, Captain Obvious. Dave walks around the hospital, his hair looking particularly beige under the florescent lights. A couple of detectives ask to interview him about the fire. They say they know it was arson, originating in the storage room, where a dead body was found, and the dead guy didn't start it. They found this out in less than a day? They call Dave a hero for saving Mike's life. Dave seems a bit depressed. Killing someone will do that to you, believe me.
Katherine brings cookies to Mike in the hospital, and Mike actually says, "Can I get a kiss from my cookie?" Barf. Katie doesn't want people to find out about them, especially Susan, since they're "good friends." She runs into Susan on the way out, and I'm really digging Susan's jacket. Susan tells Katie that she gave blood. Then she goes to visit Mike, and she tells him she gave blood too. Is this going to come into play later? Will Susan become woozy and accidentally pull the plug on some coma dude? Suzy-Q is eyeing Mike's cookies (by which I mean actual cookies). Didn't she get a free one with some juice after giving blood? She immediately spits out the bite of the cookie she just took because she hates macadamia nuts, which is ridick, cuz macadamia nuts are awesome. She persists in knowing who brought the cookies, and Mike lets it slip that "she" wants to tell Susan "in her own time." Sounds like Susan's got a mystery to solve!
Share this diet secret with Gabby and spare her some pain.
Meanwhile, Bree looks in on a sleeping Orson, who, thanks to a nose injury now snores louder than Tom Arnold when he passes out on the couch after drinking a case of Keystone. It's fixable, but it'll take a couple weeks to schedule the operation. Dave comes to see Mike, and Mike thanks him for saving his life. Dave blahs about how, since his brother died, he hasn't had a really good friend. At this point, I'm wondering if Dave's brother was actually on the show at one point. But I can't think of anyone. I think I'm making more out of this mystery than there is, and giving the writers for this season way more credit than they deserve. Dave wants Mike to be a really good buddy (for daily reach-around activities) and Mike agrees.
Tom's the least injured. He just gets stitches on his hand. Wuss. The detectives walk in and ask about Porter and the fight he had with Warren Schilling, the guy who kicks pregnant ladies in the stomach and beats up 16-year-old kids. Classy. Detective Baldy Balderson asks if Porter made a death threat against Warren (which he did), and Lynette lies and says that he didn't. Really? asks Detective Surly McWeirdeyes. Heck no, replies Lynette. Tom is all, you liar! Porter totally did, didn't he! Yeah, Tom, he did.
That's great. Is the band still together?
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Comments (8)
Why would it matter that Orson's doctor is Andrew's boyfriend? It definitely caught me off guard, but then again, I had forgotten Andrew was even gay since it hasn't been mentioned in like 3 seasons.
Also, there is no way in hell that model Gaby would have eaten all those ribs in public (without barfing them up in the bathroom 10 minutes later) OR that Carlos, being the asshole that he was at the beginning of this show, would have found that appealing.
Great last picture of Beige...I mean Dave.
1 of 8 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on December 4, 2008 9:16 PM
I don't really know how I feel about this episode.
The highlight, for me, was Orson's hysterical snoring and Bree's subsequent expression. And her pancake spiel.
And also, I don't know where you live, but in Canada, they have the McRib...
They brought it back awhile ago.
2 of 8 | Posted by georgiababe | Posted on December 5, 2008 1:16 AM
The McRib is seasonal here in the U.S. At least it has been in every place I've lived. I thought it would be here through the holiday season, but the McDonald's I went to downtown didn't have it on the menu anymore. Boo.
I liked the Bree/Orson storyline, and the Katherine/Susan interaction. I'm a bit confused about Anne's motives. Was it her intention this whole time just to get freaking bus fare and money from the Scavos so she could leave her husband? I'm assuming so, but it's not like she was poor. Surely she had some money saved. But it is disappointing that all the curves we've been thrown this season have been predictable.
3 of 8 | Posted by hypnotoad | Posted on December 5, 2008 5:00 AM
I agree, Andrew does have pretty low standards.
(I thought my standards were low but even I wouldn't do THAT guy. Though I want that statue on the window sill behind him.)
I kind of like Dave's lips.
4 of 8 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on December 5, 2008 7:44 AM
Speaking of continuity, this has been bugging me since I saw the scene. Bree slept on the couch, and was p.o.'d about how uncomfortable it was, but hello......the last time they were fighting, didn't Orson sleep in the guest room...in a bed that looked as luxurious as their master bed? argh
5 of 8 | Posted by qupert | Posted on December 5, 2008 8:30 AM
Good recap - but I'm going into depression - from McClusky deprevation.
The spouse abuse story line hit pretty close to home - reminding me how poorly our society can handle such situations. Unless the woman (or man) has their own resources, they are pretty much on their own - no one will offer meaningful help until after it's too late.
6 of 8 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on December 5, 2008 3:42 PM
qupert: I kind of thought maybe she was sleeping downstairs on the couch b/c the cguest room was too close to the Master BR and therefore she could still hear the snoring...but of course I am probably giving the writers too much credit for that one...
7 of 8 | Posted by LNNC92 | Posted on December 8, 2008 7:22 AM
Great review as always. Despite what McDonald's was saying last year the McRib is not gone forever. You can get them in Southwest MO and Southeast KS. I have had 2 and it was more than enough. Only got 2 because it was on sale.
8 of 8 | Posted by gsensel | Posted on December 8, 2008 7:29 PM