Testimonials

Dylan comes downstairs to find her mom pouting at the dining room table. Katherine informs Dylan that she has written down all the information she knows about Dylan's father, including his last known location, relative's addresses and current medications he is on. Before Katherine will give Dylan the information, she makes Dylan promise that if she finds her father, not to tell him where they are. Katherine tells Dylan that the last time she saw him was when she told him that she was leaving and was taking Dylan with her. He slapped Katherine around, slammed her face into a wall and made her perform Proud Mary right after her miscarriage. As he was choking her and threatening to kill her, Katherine could only think about what would happen to Dylan if her father killed her. Dylan says that she will ask her teacher for another assignment and gives her mother a big hug before leaving the room. Katherine unfolds the piece of paper allegedly containing the information about Dylan's father, and we see that it was completely blank.

The writers hand in next week's script.

While Orson is passed out on the couch from a long, hard day of being creepy, Bree sneaks out with Benjamin to attend the Gotleib's bris. While at the ritual mutilation, Bree corners the Mohel and asks him if he could perform a bris for her baby while he has his schissors out. She tells him that her name is Bree Hodge-Rabinowitz, and that her husband, a big, stubborn goy, won't allow their child to be nipped. Bree really lays on the Jew and promises that her child will be as devout a Jew as she is to coerce the Mohel to perform a quick pricklet nip in the bathroom.

I'm not going to even tell you how much I spent on this blankie. $200 I spent on this blankie! Oy.

Bree comes home to find Orson awake and informs him that she and Benjamin had a very busy day: picking up the dry cleaning, going to the bank, getting circumcised. Orson moderately rages the way WASPs do, but Bree says that it's her blood in the kid, so it's ultimately her decision how his penis will look. Orson is angry that she sees him as nothing but a nanny or creepy, older, male family-friend. He reminds Bree how much he did to help her keep up the fake pregnancy hoax, and he sees himself as the child's father as much as Bree is the mother. Bree begins to cry, or possibly leak, and apologizes for her duplicity. She has to remember that it's love that makes a family and not blood. Love, lying, blackmail, alcoholism, and attempted murder. She hands over the little bubuhla to Orson to hold before informing him that Benjamin's Hebrew name is Simka.

Carlos meets Gaby at the dock, and she tells him the story about how she barely escaped with her life when Victor went for the gun. Carlos asks if she saw the gun, and Gaby replies not exactly but she knows he was going for something sinister and deadly. Carlos and Gaby go onto the boat to look in Victor's bag and only find a sweater, but a very sinister and deadly looking sweater that he could have easily choked her with. Carlos and Gaby realize that they have to go back out to find Victor and save him from the Open Water.

Back at the Scavo's, Lynette is busy cleaning the kid's cage when her sisters, Lucy and the even bitchier one, pull up and dump their mom's luggage and their mom on the front lawn. The three sisters all go inside to argue about who will be saddled with their mother while Stella sits on the porch listening. Lydia is spouting therapy from her notecards while the other sister, Cindy, says that she can't have her mother at her house since her husband and her may reconcile any day now and he definitely won't come home if Stella is living there. The sisters all reminisce about the times their mom would get drunk at school functions and childhood parties ("my skirt twirled up!").

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Posted in Desperate Housewives by FozzieBare at 6:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)
Last Comment: juddfan on Nov 20, 2007 01:00 PM.