Testimonials

The next day, Susan and Mike, the most boring snoozer couple in the world, are enjoying a hearty breakfast complete with pancakes, fresh fruit and loads of Mrs. Buttersworth since Susan has quickly adapted to eating for two. Mike asks Susan if she wants to be fat, only exacerbating her already terminal eating disorder. I'm ecstatic when their boring conversation is interrupted by someone to liven up this dull....Oh dear lord it's that lantern-jaw stick in the mud Julie. What fresh hell is this? She tells her mom that the party she's going to at the Johnson's place doesn't start until 10 so she would like to stay out until 1 AM. Super mom Susan says sure, and reminds her daughter that sex gets you love, before Mike interrupts.

He says that he's worked on the plumbing after one of the Johnson boy's parties and snaked some pretty questionable items out of the toilets. Julie says that she doesn't drink, or poop, so it won't be a problem, and then Mike shares some of the wild moments from his misspent youth, including the time he renewed his subscription to the Sunday New York Times and successfully completed the crossword puzzle, in pen! Susan is caught in the middle of the back and forth and when she wakes up she sides with Mike saying that the party doesn't sound safe for a teenage girl. Julie storms out, well actually more like saunters out boringly, to the next room to finish her DNA model. Not for school, just for fun!

Dear God, he even puts himself to sleep.

Miss McCluskey, the patron saint of all things sexy, stops Dylan as she's passing and mentions how much she's grown up. McCluskey tells Dylan that she used to baby-sit her (to earn money for her modeling headshots) and mentions something about Dylan's dad. Dylan is visibly confused since she has no memory of her dad and her mom had always told her that her dad ran off before Dylan was born. The thick plottens.

Just a little something for the male and lesbian readers.

The chemo lunch is well under way as all the ladies buzz about and dote on Lynette. Salad, lasagna, and drinks have already been served and now it's Bree's time to shine as she serves up her world famous lemon meringue pie. The ladies all take a bite and announce that it's the best pie they've ever had and could just bury their face in that pie all day. Bree takes a taste and realizes that she's fallen victim to the oldest trick in the book: the pie switcharoo. Katherine declares she is guilty and switched them out when Bree was busy cleaning her gun and keeping Jews out of her country club. Katherine is a master of passive aggression and says she just wanted Bree to taste her pie and give some tips since everyone says she's the master baker on the block.

You can cut the tension in the air with a plastic surgeon's scalpel, so Susan decides to discuss something more pleasant and asks Lynette about her chemo. Lynette tells the ladies that she married a raging pussy and would like one of her friends to come with her to chemo instead of Tom from now on. Everyone, including Katherine, agrees to sit with her but Gaby remains oddly silent. The main reason I love Lynette is that she never backs down from a confrontation and this is no exception. Later Lynette confronts Gaby about her refusal to offer her services as chemo buddy. Lynette tells Gaby that she's the most fun and she needs that during chemo. Obviously Lynette doesn't think Susan's pratfalls are fun either. Gaby gives in and agrees to come to with Lynette to her next good old fashioned chemo party.

You com-a with me to chemo or I'll mess up-a you-a face!

Later that day, Bree is buzzing about her kitchen while angrily explaining Katherine's deception to her husband, Agent Dale Cooper. Bree is experimenting with all different kinds of ingredients in an effort to surpass or match Katherine's pie. Of course Bree prides herself on having the best pie in the neighborhood and this bridge and tunnel cross eyed bitch isn't going to usurp her power. Agent Cooper tried to convince Bree that she has to bite the bullet and ask Katherine for her recipe. Bree agrees since her cooking is the only thing that makes her special. Agent Cooper reminds her that she can also do that trick with a stack of quarters.

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Posted in Desperate Housewives by FozzieBare at 12:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (12)
Last Comment: blahblah on Oct 14, 2007 07:45 AM.