Did you know that when you're trying to lose weight, it's best to lose 10 lbs really quickly, and then make some excuses for your lost motivation while you guzzle booze and eat pizza? No, you hadn't heard that? That's because it's NOT TRUE. Try telling that to these chumps. This week on DietTribe, we watch the five fat friends fall down--literally (at Camp Pendleton) and metaphorically (can you say cupcakes, pizza, and margaritas?). Can Jessie keep them motivated, and will Therapist Stacy use pop psychology and talk about emotions? Maybe, and you bet!
Follow me!
First off, I still haven't figured out this wacky word play with "DietTribe". Diatribe = in archaic Greek/Latin, it means "to wear away". Hey, that almost fits! But somehow, I doubt the brain trusts at Lifetime thought it through that far. I think I need to settle down and cope with the fact that it just means "tribe", a band of people, on a "diet", trying to lose weight. DietTribe. Nothing more complicated than that. *sigh*
Also, apologies to two of our little buddies--your humble recapper fucked up your names last week. It's not my fault, though. Jessie? That's how a GIRL spells it. Also, they spell it "Lanessa" and they say it "Laneesa". I write Laneesa. Deal with it.
Phew, now that the paperwork's all finished, let's get to recapping!
We start this week at the gym, where Jessie's putting the mares through their paces. They're doing some step-ups, lateral shoulder raises, squats...the basic Body Pump/Total Body Conditioning/Club Strength/etc. class that every gym's got.
In a way that really should seem scripted but actually comes across quite naturally, Sideshow Tiffany asks Jessie about the ol' "muscle weighs more than fat" and "I don't want to get bulky" myths. Jessie busts the myths quite handily--they're doing low weights, high repetitions, muscle burns more calories at rest, yadda yadda. Again, it's the same stuff you read online and in magazines all the time, but it's nice to see it in context.
Gigantic Laneesa's struggling with these step-ups, and she reveals that she has a pin in her hip. Ouch. Jessie is appropriately concerned and seems to strike a good balance between being sympathetic and yet encouraging her to push past it. It's all a mindgame, and if you tell yourself that you can't do it, then you can't. That's a bastardization of the ol' Henry Ford quote I love so much.
Also, Jessie's hair is a mess in these interviews here--it's almost like when Seinfeld got his hair cut at the new barber.
A little sidebar here from Jessie about how much more important diet will become to this weight loss journey (ah, popped the cherry for this week!). I can vouch for this--you can work your ass off in the gym, but if you're shoveling sugar and fat into your pie-hole, you aren't going to lose the weight. In fact, I would bet money on the fact that these women could stop going to the gym TODAY and still meet their weight loss goals, if they'd just stick to the diet 100%. However, a lot of us know that sticking to a diet 100% of the time SUCKS and is hard, so...the workouts balance out that percentage of "oops" we have per week. It's called "life". Anyhoo.
One of the biggest things Jessie talks about here is alcohol. No drinking, bitches! Alcohol dehydrates you, it slows your metabolism, and it's high in sugar, which gets metabolized as fat. Big no-no in weight loss mode. I sense some foreshadowing...
Now we get to see a little more of what these women do every day. Frumpy Mary is a stay at home mom. Bland Rita and Laneesa work together at a costume shop. (Huh??! It's Hollywood--I guess it's in business year round, but to my East coast ass, this seems weird.) Tiffany has two jobs and shuttles the kids to sports...pretty much the same with Clowny Steph. I can already see it coming: "We're too busy to eat right!"
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Comments (5)
The Jessie/Seinfeld screencap comparison is too precious! HAHAHAHA!
Also, it is weird to me that Jessie spells his name with an "ie." Am I the only one?
1 of 5 | Posted by perdedorita | Posted on October 13, 2009 7:28 AM
I like that Jessie is aware that the weekend has passed!
Jesse, spell your name like a man. My name is Dave, but I don't spell it S-u-s-a-n.
2 of 5 | Posted by ScottHowardWolf | Posted on October 13, 2009 9:01 AM
I'm loving your recaps, Panda. I especially enjoyed the Seinfeld and Pearl Jam references.
Jessie the bodybuilder from "Big Brother" spells his name the same way. I think both of them are big and meaty enough to spell their names any way they want to.
This show is so much more sensible than "The Biggest Loser." No profanity-laced diatribes from the trainer (ironically), no idiotic contests trying to get them to break their diets, no humiliation. And yeah, these women are likable, and have lives--something we don't see with the BL people.
3 of 5 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on October 13, 2009 5:12 PM
The counseling! That is the other thing that is great about this show. They really need that on The Biggest Loser.
4 of 5 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on October 13, 2009 5:20 PM
Hey, thanks! I definitely like their take on the process--keeping them in their home environment, the support of friends doing the same program, a likeable trainer who's tough but fair, and counseling.
On BL, Jillian TRIES to counsel them, but that face just shrivels up any iota of sharing I'd feel!
These chicks really are growing on me, but I still can't get past Tiffany's hair. (You'll see!) :)
Again, thanks again!
5 of 5 | Posted by sexypanda | Posted on October 19, 2009 10:16 AM