Hola Gasmii! So I'm feeling really good about myself because I am superskinny as I'm just coming off a 48-hour fast. You know, the first twenty four were for Yom Kippur but I like to double up because God LOVES skinny girls. So forgive me since I'm a little light-headed. And maybe a bit drunk.
Speaking of things that make your head spin . . . who can I possible hate more? Ryan Seacrest? Or the squeaky munchkin and her neanderthal husband who own Skytop? Fortunately, I have plenty of hate to spread around so everyone's going to get a tiny piece of Tiny Elvis' mind this week.
Seacrest and Jeff are in Jeff's office reviewing bills and arguing over who is going to pay $50 for couch storage. There's a debate over why the thing was stored in the first place and who is responsible but Seacrest tells Jeff that they're not going to fight over fifty bucks and Jeff is just going to pay it.
Ooh, just look at his face. He's such a snot. Jeff says that even though his dad suggested that he talk to Seacrest immediately, and even though he has every reason to believe that Seacrest is a sneaky bastard, he wants to make sure he knows exactly what he's doing and wants to keep his emotions in check. Jenni says that even though it seems like Jeff is getting bent over just $50, it's really about something else. Jenni is so smart.
Seacrest says that he doesn't know why Jeff has been irritated lately and he's been trying to get it out of him. Yeah, right. All I see is poking and needling. Needling and poking. Before Seacrest leaves, Jeff asks if he has any other bills he would like Jeff to pay -- like Chloe's college tuition.
Jeff and Jenni return to Skytop to visit Squeaky and Neanderthal. He's complaining about some wires that are wearing a bucket as a hat and she's wearing camo pants. There's ugly everywhere.
Even though Jeff endured Taco Tuesday at Skytop in his pajamas, Squeaky and Neanderthal only hired him to do their outdoor lighting and sprinklers. Jeff does not appreciate this trial run and does not like being graded. Squeaky and Neanderthal complain that the ivy on their property is being trampled. Apparently, they would like the outdoor lighting to be installed via hovercraft. Even Jenni mocks their lack of intelligence and explains that the unspoken rule, the secret handshake, if you will, is "your house is going to get screwed up, dude."
Squeaky would like "people of Jeff's kind" to do the work and to be mindful and precise and operate from a place of excellence. Jeff laments that he can't tell clients what's on his mind. I commend him for not telling her to fuck off then and there. Jenni describes them as a bit too much like Jeff -- a little too much time on their hands, a dash of passive-aggressive and a splash of sarcasm.
Has Jeff mentioned that he doesn't like working for other people? Jeff and Jenni are in the office and Jenni calls Boney (his real estate agent) to ask about a listing. Jeff needs to get back to flipping regardless of his relationship with Seacrest so his plan is to finish up improvements at Valley Oak, sell it and use the funds to do another flip. Before he hangs up with her, Jeff asks Boney for her opinion of the current financial crisis -- because brokers are a good source of unbiased information when it comes to selling your house and buying another one.
Boney thinks that the market will level off for a few years and then there will be another major financial disaster. So -- of course -- you should sell Valley Oak right now and buy something else right now. Jeff tells her that Jenni just hung herself.
Jeff is preparing for an open house at Valley Oak and hired Chris to frame-in the flat screen in the master bedroom. This scene is completely boring and a waste of time except that I think I may have a crush on Chris.
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Comments (6)
The reason I think Jeff was so indirect with Seacrest is because of the relationship he and Jeff had. It seems to me that if Jeff cuts Seacrest loose, he really doesn't have many friends or romantic prospects, therefore, he keeps Seacrest around because having someone, no matter how big of an asshole they are, is easier to accept than to be alone. (Plus, they're wouldn't be a show!) Had it been anyone else, or someone who Jeff didn't respect or care for, he would've been as dismissive and catty as we've come to expect.
1 of 6 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on October 1, 2009 8:28 AM
Did anyone else notice that the can neanderthal is holding is part of the "art project" from before? I do believe we have some shady attention grabbers in the mix and it's all a ruse for air time and to drive poor Jeff over the edge.
2 of 6 | Posted by Reagirl | Posted on October 1, 2009 1:53 PM
I would not trust that Seacrest - his body language says "paybacks."
They had better go their separate ways.
3 of 6 | Posted by wasabipeas | Posted on October 1, 2009 2:48 PM
hahahaha, I cannot believe how anal the Neanderthal was. And his prancing wife, Lord have mercy! Looks like she is wearing vibrating butterfly 24x7. BTW, few days ago I was creeped out when I watched "I love the New Millenium" on VH1 and Neanderthal was on it... his name is Brad and last name ends with "wood"....
4 of 6 | Posted by bedzia | Posted on October 1, 2009 6:56 PM
bedzia, that's who he is!! Brad Sherwood! I knew I'd seen his face before. He's a comic. Allegedly. And apparently an OCD-afflicted man. You know you're carrying around a big bag of crazy if you make Jeff look totally reasonable by comparison.
I don't know what to say about Ryan. Either this is all a put-on for the tv show or he really is a nasty little piece of work.
5 of 6 | Posted by Memememe | Posted on October 3, 2009 10:02 PM
On the other hand:
http: // tinyurl. com /yekz2g9
Ryan's side of the story.
6 of 6 | Posted by Memememe | Posted on October 3, 2009 10:07 PM