Then it was time for a quick trip to the candy store. In spite of the "No sampling" signs around the store, Paula stuffed her face with about ten different pieces of candy. "When you bring a fat girl to a candy store, wait'll you see how big her smile gets." Um, no offense, but I'd be more concerned with how big her ass gets, but that's just me.

Damn, y'all.

Double Damn, y'all.

Soap is for sissies

How romantic!

Ernest Borgnine meets Santa meets buttermilk on his cereal

Do y'all think Paula puts butter in her tea?

Ketchup is more of a vegetable than this thing
After three wardrobe changes due to her general sloppiness and several instances of her sons mimicking her unsanitary finger licking practices (ugh, these people own a restaurant?), it was time to eat.
What did I learn? Well, I learned the difference between "Bawwl" ("boil") and, "Balww" ("ball"), that Paula laughs like Richard Simmons, and that drinking butter from a deep fried turkey carcass is simply devine, y'all!
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Comments (15)
wow, i almost threw up my thanksgiving dinner because i'm laughing so hard.
i never watch this show, but damn y'all, i cant believe she even has a show about deep frying a turkey stuffed with butter!
1 of 15 | Posted by jash | Posted on November 24, 2005 4:38 PM
I LOVE oyster dressing!!! My friend's mom always made it just for me when I lived in South Carolina. I'm a much better dinner guest than a cook.
2 of 15 | Posted by Dana | Posted on November 24, 2005 6:26 PM
I'm surprised there were no crumbled crackers in any of these dishes, or cream of mushroom soup -- those seem to be two of her other staples. At least she got the marshmallows in.
3 of 15 | Posted by holyterror | Posted on November 24, 2005 8:14 PM
Paula looks like that retarded kid on South Park in that top screencap.
4 of 15 | Posted by JustUsMoms | Posted on November 24, 2005 8:28 PM
Her husband's moustache is yellow! Must be a pound of butter stuck in there!
5 of 15 | Posted by Ken | Posted on November 25, 2005 4:59 AM
Now, y'all can beat up on Rachael Ray all you want, but I LOSE IT when people say bad things about my beloved Paula Deen! LOL
6 of 15 | Posted by Brian | Posted on November 25, 2005 10:14 AM
sg-dub- I died when I saw your comment that your CT friends say that you are from the south. My friends from MA, told me the same thing but I quickly gave them a history and geography lesson about the Mason-Dixon Line.
But I must say us Pennsylvanians need to unite and remain strong...even if you are from the wrong side of the state! :)
7 of 15 | Posted by Wendy | Posted on November 25, 2005 11:26 AM
several instances of her sons mimicking her unsanitary finger licking practices (ugh, these people own a restaurant?)
I thought I was the only one grossed out by Paula's licking her fingers and then touching the rest of the food with it. Yuck, yuck, yuck. I hate to think what goes on behind the scenes of the restaurant. It would be interesting to know what kind of rating it gets from the health department.
8 of 15 | Posted by Aries | Posted on November 26, 2005 8:36 AM
I usually love most recaps on TVgasm, but this one was too brutal.
Paula's dishes are not healthy at all, but I don't think her hygiene is bad at all.
9 of 15 | Posted by joevanni | Posted on November 26, 2005 2:06 PM
"... stuffed with a hummingbird."
Oh, man. We laughed so hard at that!
10 of 15 | Posted by Donna Martin Graduates! | Posted on November 27, 2005 1:46 PM
i wonder if she'll just get lazy and include butter as a "dairy" serving next year
11 of 15 | Posted by Ris | Posted on November 27, 2005 7:16 PM
My family and I enjoyed a wonderful meal at The Lady and Sons (their restaurant) in Savannah on Thanksgiving Day. The food was outstanding and a buffet so we were filled! They take reservations on holidays so we waited all of 0 minutes!
12 of 15 | Posted by Jen | Posted on November 28, 2005 5:01 AM
I loved this special. We put on a copy @ 9AM on a sunday morning and broke out a bottle of belgian ale and about a dozen busch beers for the three of us. The trick is to drink every time somebody says "Y'all (the phrase "all yall" gets four sips)," Paula kisses her husband, or she uses a stick of butter. Basically, you'll be hammered within the hour and will have a lot of great drinking, er, cooking ideas by the time you're done
13 of 15 | Posted by cresty mccresterson | Posted on November 28, 2005 1:02 PM
As crazy as they look...we had a Turducken for thanksgiving and it was DELICIOUS. Try it y'all!
14 of 15 | Posted by daniel | Posted on November 28, 2005 3:47 PM
Sometimes we get lazy and just eat the Turd.
15 of 15 | Posted by Lizardqueen | Posted on November 29, 2005 6:13 AM