Dude, wait, Thanksgiving's over? Damn you, tryptophan coma!
Or: I meant to write this recap before I went out of town for Thanksgiving, but it just wasn't in the cards. Also not in the cards: a stress-free Thanksgiving. Our oven decided to crap out halfway through the turkey cooking, so my sister and I were woken up at the crack of dawn and ordered to rush the bird over to my grandmother's house to cook it the rest of the way in her oven. So we slapped a siren on the roof, threw on some paramedic uniforms, carefully loaded the precious cargo into the Turkey Ambulance, and screamed across town. Good news: the patient was saved, and was delicious.
But not as delicious as Friday Night Lights!
"The recruiting circus is coming to town, folks!" screams Slammin' Sammy Mead. Thanks Sammy! Smash is working out in his room, gazing dreamily at posters of Porsches and other various cock extensions, while his mother is being bombarded by calls from college recruiters. Sister Smash brings the phone to his room, where he graces us with this little nugget: "The Smash train is pulling out of the station, you better hang on or you'll lose a seat!" Great, Smash has Bruce Vilanch writing for him now.
A small montage now begins, one filled with our cheerful little Dillonites waking up to a brand new day. Julie sulks in bed while her mother and aunt (dammit!) try to lure her out. Matt bumps into Carlotta just as she's getting out of the shower and almost orgasms right there in the hallway.
Fievel Goes North
Jackie graces the Riggins household with her MILFy presence, but this time she's with Billy. Tim takes one look at the two of them and starts packing his bags. He storms out of the house, amidst vague protests from the star-crossed lovers. Billy, you're a dumbass. Tim screeches away in his truck, finally arriving at...well, it must be Jason's house! Wait, no. Guess it's Tyra's. Okay then. Weird. He says he needs a place to stay, so she shoots back, "Forty-eight hours, Tim, that's all you got." Which is incidentally exactly how long it'll take for Tim to piss off every single member of the Collette family and possibly even put his own ass through a coffee table.
Tami, running down the halls of Dillon High, is suddenly accosted by none other than John from Cincinnati! She practically tells him to go finish his homework, when he introduces himself as Noah Barnet, the new English teacher and advisor for the school paper. Tami, shocked that someone so young and so Shane West-ish could possibly be teaching in her school, apologizes and promises him the keys. To her...activity room.
In the locker room, Coach forbids his boys from accepting any free gifts from recruiters, including cell phones, concert tickets, meals, rides home, Wiis, or Tickle Me Elmos. Doing so might endanger their State eligibility, and, even more frighteningly, would threaten their ability to yell WE GOING TO STATE every five seconds.
Smash runs into a recruiter from Miami Southern, who is then run into by some saucy young girl who gives him a big hug. Turns out she is the sister of Owen Davenport, a Panther who graduated when Smash was a sophomore and is now playing for Miami Southern himself. Smash sort of flirts with her, and she sort of flirts back, and, um, okay. Do they know each other already? Are they actually just flirting or are they talking about football? Don't worry, this confusion will remain for the rest of the episode.
Meanwhile, Coach tells Santiago to go to the guidance counselor's office and make sure he's all squared away academically, so that he can play on the team. "And be nice to her, she's my wife," he barks. So you know what that means, Santiago. Hands off the breast pumps.
Landry is telling Tyra all about how his father turned the wagon into a "charcoal briquette" but Tyra is just soooo over this plotline. Tami arrives to save the day, pulling Tyra away from Landry so that she can beg her to head up the entertainment portion of this mysterious event known as Pantherama. She ropes Lyla into it too, and when they both start making excuses, Tami, the scheming little mink that she is, calls them out on it. Then she scrunches up her face, and it's all over. No one can refuse the Tami Scrunch.
Fun Fact: Tyra pulls in some extra cash on weekends by doubling as a giraffe at the zoo.
« America's Most Smartest Model: Run, Russia, Run! | Main | The Hills: Don't Turn Around Now, You're Not Welcome Anymore »
Comments (4)
Mama Smash is pissed! Even I was ducking for cover!
I am loving the Santiago/Buddy storyline. I can't wait to see where this goes.
And as far as the Julie and the teacher - I've seen some outrage on the web about it, but I don't think it'll go anywhere. It seems as though the writers are flirting with it to get people talking.
In the end though, I can see Tami talking to the teacher...pointing out how it's inappropriate for him to befriend his students. It's probably his first teaching job, so he doesn't see some of the more subtle boundaries, if you will.
That's my thought anyway.
Oh, and I have to be honest...I wasn't missing Jason this week.
1 of 4 | Posted by ThisShowRocks! | Posted on November 28, 2007 7:45 AM
Another fine recap - despite your turkey emergencies!
I found most of the plots at least interesting. I hope ThisShowRocks is right about Julie's teacher.
I like Jason, but can see how it becomes complicated to involve him.
I really like Carlotta's character, but I can see bad things happening for her once the inevitable happens.
Whatever happened to Matt's dad? He must have the longest deployment to Iraq ever.
2 of 4 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on November 28, 2007 9:50 AM
Thanks for the excellent recap, SP! Buddy Garrity with his George Washington hair and the screencap of him and Coach will have me laughing for a long time to come.
I hope the storyline with Julie and Noah doesn't really go anywhere. We already have enough "adults having sex with underage kids" on this show between Tim and the MILF and Matt and Carlotta. Though I would be amused to see what Coach and Tami would do to him.
I love Santiago. When he said that was his first real bed, my heart swelled like the Grinch's. I look forward to a lot of comic relief (plus occasional real bonding) with him and Buddy Garrity.
I'm siding with Smash over Mama Williams, as much as I adore Mama Williams. Smash can always go back to college if/when his football career ends. If he's really not interested in academics (and he doesn't seem to be), he won't get much out of college, anyway.
Sorry, SP, I didn't miss Jason in this episode, either. I don't like what they've done with his character this season.
3 of 4 | Posted by domino | Posted on November 28, 2007 4:44 PM
Buddy's first mistake will def involve alcohol.
I too am feeling Santiago now!
Julie and teach....disturbing but TOTALLY realistic. Except for the fact that both her parents faculty at her school...I would think she would want to distance herself from school...
Yay for Smash storyline!Interesting too..
Awww, Jason Street wasn't in the fridge...but there's always next week!
4 of 4 | Posted by Sweetleaf911 | Posted on December 1, 2007 10:15 PM