Happy Cristmakwanza Gasmii! Hope you all are enjoying a break from school, work, and any other activities that are part of your daily grind. I, for one, am writing this recap from in front of the hearth at my local Starbucks instead of from under the harsh lighting of my less-local office. (Gotta love working from home!)
Apparently our friends at Girls Next Door were also feeling the holiday slackerness too, because this week's episode is more of a slideshow con voiceover than an episode with any real plot.
You better hope the ghost of boobs past doesn't stop by or your flat chest will get thrown out on the street.
So the whole premise of this quasi-episode is that Hollz, Bridg, and Kenny are creating a Girls Next Door scrapbook for mass consumption and decide to look through all of Hef's old scrapbooks to get ideas. Turns out Hef is a HUGE scrapbooker, which makes him a super loser in my book. I stand firm by my scrapbooker-equals-loser rule because in all of my 23 years I have never found it to be untrue. The girl in the cube next to me is a scrapbooker. She also met her husband on MySpace and gets into heated arguments about who didn't remove the lint from the dryer lint trap in her duplex. Case and point.
Anyway, we start off with Holly going into Bridg's room so they can show each other what they found to include in the GND scrapbook. Kendra comes in, surprisingly sans make up and less-surprisingly sans any items for the scrapbook. She says she's too unorganized, and Hollz and Bridg look like they weren't expecting any better.
OK we've all known for years that Kendra is a super slacker, but really?? If you think about it her only jobs are 1) Breathing 2) Lying still under Hef once a month and 3) Doing minimal prep work for her reality show. She seriously couldn't dig out a photo or two to bring into this pre-planned scrapbook meeting?! Thank god she's pretty.
Next Hef comes in and, after Holly explains what they're all doing, tells the girls that he's the "number one scrapbooker of all time" and invites them into his scrapbook room. (Scrapbook ROOM?! Double loser.)
I brought you some antibacterial hand cream. You'll need it.
As Hef leads his young concubines down long hallways completely covered in photos from his glory days, I start to feel sad and a little sickened. Hef's life is literally flashing before his eyes. He must have started scrapbooking with the intent of looking back on his life one day and admiring all he's done, except this episode exposes the one flaw in his plan -- he has no one to look back on it with. Sure, the three girls are physically there, but it's pretty clear they're each counting the minutes til they can run back to their wrinkle-less lovers.
My Hef pity party soon ends, however, as we start to learn what a creepo womanizer he really was. Things start off innocently enough with pics of Hef and his family on their farm in Nebraska circa 1863. Seriously though, his baby photos look more like charcoal sketches than anything that came out of a camera. Kendra is especially amused by these ancient relics.
K: Who would have thought that you would be Hugh Hefner?! That's crazy!
Know what else is crazy, Ken? Your perception of time, space, and celebrity.
Buffalo Bill got shot at my third birthday party in the saloon.
Next we see all of the comic books Hef made when he was younger, and turns out he was a pretty good artist. We also learn about his high school sweetheart, Betty, who does her own separate testimonial. She's a cute old lady that is probably secretly skeeved out by what her old bf has become. Hef cast Betty in the starring role of that old horror film he made when he was younger, but he was heartbroken when she invited someone else to a hayride instead of him.
Kendra butts in, asking what a hayride is. Now I grew up around Boston (aka not farmland) but even we had haunted hay rides on Halloween. Do they not do that in San Diego? Have you never seen a hayride on TV? Or are you just running behind on hitting your daily word quota? Yeah, thought so.
After pretend-listening to Hef's explanation, Kendra gets to the crux of the issue.
K: Did you fuck?
Hef: We necked. These were very innocent times.
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Comments (9)
I thought it seemed like a "good-bye" ep too.
So Ang, are we the only 2 watching????
1 of 9 | Posted by Quean CeCe | Posted on December 27, 2008 3:51 PM
Didn't Hef's daughter run the Playboy Empire for awhile? Is it the same daughter?
I think it's kind of cute that Hef is a scrapbooker. Does he use those fancy scissors and the stickers and stuff? If only the content of his books weren't so icky.
2 of 9 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on December 27, 2008 6:30 PM
Christie Hefner has been CEO of Playboy since the 80s, but recently announced that she's leaving in January.
I also remember hearing once that Hef pretty much cut her out of his will, preferring to leave everything to his sons, but I don't know if that's true.
3 of 9 | Posted by blanketessa | Posted on December 28, 2008 2:07 PM
According to Wiki, Hef has a son from his marriage to Mildred, as well as their daughter, Christie. Did I miss it when they mentioned him? Also, the only thing Wiki has on Christie, other than her tenure at Playboy, is the fact that she established a First Amendment award in honour of her father.
Looks like there are 5 of us watching!
4 of 9 | Posted by natural redhead | Posted on December 28, 2008 2:52 PM
this felt like a good bye episode and I have to admit I will be a bit sad when the gnd are no more. they made for some good television. although these latest episodes are no where near as entertaining as the first couple of seasons. I wished that this show had been recapped since the beginning. the recaps have made the most of the show, but in the beginning seasons it was show that actually had plenty of happenings that would have been worth recapping. thanks for laughs and making the show entertaining again.
5 of 9 | Posted by reckless_Saturn_11 | Posted on December 29, 2008 6:32 AM
Wow, impressive detective work guys!
That's messed up if Hef really wrote Christie out of his will. He owes her for all the crap she probably got in high school!!
Remember when Hollz was pushing for an engagement ring? Thinks he had her eye on a piece of the Hefster's will??
6 of 9 | Posted by anglophista | Posted on December 29, 2008 9:27 AM
I think they're stalling because there was a backlash regarding the twins. Does anyone like them?! I'm guessing not. Crappy episodes = time to solve the twin debacle.
7 of 9 | Posted by efk2020 | Posted on December 29, 2008 2:46 PM
Hi there.I watch too... Did anyone catch Holly and Criss Angel on Larry King last night? It was PAINFULLY awkward. She seemed like she had never been in front of a camera before.
8 of 9 | Posted by tillee | Posted on December 30, 2008 8:23 AM
Tillee - I second that! I wasn't sure if it was just because I was so used to seeing her in a different environment or if it was my imagination but PAINFULLY awkward is exactly what it was!
9 of 9 | Posted by Kara | Posted on December 30, 2008 11:46 AM