Testimonials

"Oh God," Blair says to Serena on the phone (because apparently you can just make phone calls all day in jail), "You're not gonna come out of there with a mullet and a girlfriend, are you?"

No seriously. There's a scrapbook.

Dorota is back! She tells Blair that her prom dress was ruined at the dry cleaners, but a new and improved dress mysteriously showed up from Paris this morning, and it looks exactly like the dress sketched in B's scrapbook. Don't you love when life works out exactly as you scrapbooked?

There's been more mysterious prom mishaps and Nate lists them off for Chuck--the dress, a lost corsage, canceled hotel room etc. He thinks Chuck is up to no good, but C denies it.

Back at the reunion of the crazy mamas, Lily tries again to get her mother out of her life. She goes so far as to call her mother "toxic." Hello?! All moms are toxic. Get in line, Lils. Flashback to teen Lily Rhodes looking for her sister, Carol. She walks into the diner where she works, but Carol isn't there. Owen "Douche Bag Face" is there however and he knows where the sister will be tonight. But first Lily has to change into something more hip. Luckily, everyone at the diner has a full-size locker and Carol keeps all her clothes there.

Then the 80s/Goldilocks montage begins:

Lily is still unsure about her outfit, but DBF approves.

Just before the montage, Dan finds out that Serena is still in jail, which leads to him wanting to take her to prom, I guess. He walks into Jenny's room to ask for clothes while she poses seductively in fish nets and heels for no reason.

Lily goes back to the jail to drop the charges against Serena (again?) but Serena is gone.

Back to the 80s! Gwen Stefani and company perform in a band called "Snowed Out." Get it? Snowed out? Get it? Say it real fast but don't look at the words like you're playing Mad Gab. Oh Gossip Girl, you're so clever.

I love how this scene is so typical of all the teen 80s movies we've ever seen where the street kid takes the snooty rich girl to some happenin' hole in the wall place where the walls are covered in gum and graffiti and it looks smelly. Just when you think guys can't get any douchier, this guy shows up.

He's DBF's friend AND is sort of dating Carol, who finally shows up in dramatic fashion, babbling about some issue that needs to get resolved. The sisters reunite then rush out to the Impala, and we're all sad they didn't say DeLorean instead.

Finally we are back in 2009 at The Most Boring Prom Ever. There's even a big band playing. I was lucky enough to attend my old high school's prom last Saturday as a chaperone, and I gotta say it was way more fun than this one. Why aren't the kids humping on the dance floor? Where's the principal checking all the dark corners to make sure kids aren't making babies? Where are the stoned hippies running from those dark corners while pulling their clothes back on? Puts the Gossip Girl prom to shame. I am sorely disappointed. Oh, and Blair and Nate got nominated for king and queen, despite how bitchy everyone thinks she is.

The headpiece girls rig the ballot box so that Blair loses. Luckily, Chuck is ALWAYS LURKING AT JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT. He heard the whole thing! He is the best lurker I have ever seen. Please God, let him get his own show where he just lurks around solving crimes in his lurking way. Lurkety lurk lurk!

Dan got Grandma Crazy to get Serena out of jail, brought her a dress, then got them a taxi to the prom. Serena get's dressed in the back of a cab while Driver McPervy sneaks a peek.

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Posted in Gossip Girl by NatalieD at 6:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)
Last Comment: imac00lkid on May 18, 2009 02:26 AM.