This week on Gossip Girl there are accidental marriages, biting ballerinas, and a giant elephant in the room named Gabriel.
It starts with a dream. Blair is a poor British (I think) gal trying to sell flowers to patrons in an upscale restaurant to make money for Yale. She approaches one couple only to find...herself! Rich, snooty Blair is having dinner with Nate at the yuppy restaurant, and she's quick to tell poor Blair how disgusting she is.
Rich Blair: You think you're going to Yale, fool? Wake up!
Poor Blair: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Thank God she wakes up from the dream. I can't handle a world with two Blairs. As she looks over at her nightstand she sees the invitation to Nate's cousin's wedding. A grinchy smile spreads across her face.
Later in the kitchen, Blair bores that teacher from Clueless her stepfather with old photos of her and Nate. Cyrus is preparing for the Passover Seder that night, which Blair is not attending. She has more important things to do like attend Tripp Vanderbilt's wedding rehearsal. She has a sneaking suspicion that the bride-to-be is going help her get into some Super Elite Committee that will send her social status sky rocketing. Her mother, Eleanor, tells her to think about her future. Cyrus says he can get her into NYU.
Blair: NYU is for partial lesbians and Toni Morrison fans. I'm going to be Jacki O.
Blair's Mom: God, I've created a monster.
Serena finally arrives home from her impromptu trip to Spain with Poppy and Gabriel (Poppy's boyfriend). Chuck pries and Serena tells him she did a lot of reading and swimming. He suspects she did more. In fact he saw Poppy at a bar last week. How could she be in two places at once? Chuck is also getting his groove on with a variety of ladies--baristas, synchronized swimmers, ballerinas.
"So you found a way to get over Blair," says Serena.
And Chuck replies, "I'm a 17-year-old billionaire with tremendous stamina."
Okay, as much as I hate Chuck, that line is pretty awesome. Maybe he's growing on me. Like a barnacle or an ingrown hair.
Blair and Nate smooch on the church steps then make small talk before Nate finally tells her the big news. Here we go. Here's Blair's big surprise!
Nate: I got into Columbia.
Blair: Yay.
Nate: I just wanted to try and get into a college without my grandfather's help. Blah blah blah grandpa blah blah blah Yale blah blah blah family stuff blabitty blah.
Blair: Cool.
He's honestly torn between Yale and Columbia. Oh, here comes Tripp's bride, Maureen. She breaks the news that the Fancy Important Committee didn't accept Blair because she's too new on the scene. They chose one of Maureen's bridesmaids instead. FYI Grandpa Vanderbilt picked the bridesmaids. Blair is crushed. Don't worry, Maureen assures her. "When it comes to these things, it takes a while to start to matter."
Another great line! Ha! I can't believe she'd actually say that to her face. If I ever own a company, I'm gonna write "it takes a while to start to matter" in the employee handbook. Maureen and Chuck are now neck and neck for best line in the episode.
Back at the poor kids home, Jenny and her science partner, Wes, are working on the same science project we all did in the first grade where you put some plants in a dark closet and others in the sunlight. Guess which one looks healthier? Wes leaves and Jenny confesses to Dan that she is trying to get him to like her. I've only seen a few seconds of him, but he seems to have zero personality. Good luck with that, Jenny. Rufus walks into the room, defeated.
Ruf: No one wants art. I'm broke.
Dan: Please let me help pay for Yale. I'm sure I'll find a temporary job in this terrible economy where I'll be able to save up enough money for Yale next year. Can I, Pops? Can I?
Ruf: No. I'm going with Lily to buy a lamp. My life is wonderful.
Rufus leaves and Jenny mentions to Dan that Wes' mom owns a catering company. This would be a great way to get Wes to like her. Plus, after months of working as a waiter, Dan will have saved up enough money to buy a book for his Intro to Journalism class. Win-win!
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Comments (3)
I was hoping the inevitable experimental girl on girl storyline was going to heat up when Blair was laying between Serena's legs. No dice. Do the hairstylists hate Serena/Blake because her hair was looking pretty awful?
1 of 3 | Posted by newcastlefan | Posted on April 27, 2009 5:49 AM
The nightmare was a knock-off of "My Fair Lady". It even had the same crappy cockney accents. All of Blaire's dreams/nightmares are set like Audrey Hepburn movies. Anyway great recap!
2 of 3 | Posted by kittkatt357 | Posted on April 27, 2009 12:02 PM
Oh and I hate Serena can the next storyline be about Georgina Killing here and having extensive plastic surgery to take over her life? I noticed on the previews that Georgie was back.
3 of 3 | Posted by kitkatt357 | Posted on April 27, 2009 12:04 PM